We're friends with benefits, but in beginning we were just good friends, we'd kiss and make out, nothing intimate. But now when I gave up my virginity to him, he stopped kissing me, but still takes advantage of hugging me, touching my hair, smelling my perfume and underwear lol and complementing how pretty I am, even when we're around his friends (both males and females) asking about my family sometimes, sharing same interests. I know he was going to ask me out sometime ago, but I didn't give him a chance, by not answering the phone and not calling him back. He would then ask me how's my boyfriend doing? like it wouldn't be obvious I'm single and waiting for him to ask me out. This situation is killing me. Should I let him know I'm feeling used or still give him more time to deepen his interest in me?
Update: I feel he's putting me through either we commit to each other or we have sex with no emotions. Because he always does the same thing, DO YOU WANNA HANG OUT? like making me feel used on purpose.
6 months ago
Stop playing games and say "I don't have a boyfriend. I have not tried to get a boyfriend, and have spurned other boys' advances, because I'm waiting for you."
It's not like he's trying to let you down or anything, if he wants to be an ass and play games like he wants you, indulge his games in the face and see if he wants you back. See if he bites.
If he is a good person and he was lacking confidence, then this will make things proceed. If he's an ass who is teasing your vulnerable feelings, this will serious things up. This is seriously affecting you, you deserve to know what is going on, and shouldn't feel guilty to turn things into serious mode okay?
He's very confident in school and work stuff, he has had many girlfriends and when we met he said I was different from the girls he's met. well he's 23 while I'm 18. But he's cool when in friends circle, but generally has that serious and melancholy appearance which sometimes drives me nuts, I start feeling he's being daddy lol & that cold distance we get when not seeing each other is his testing if I'll miss him. - 6 months ago
Look, you don't have to explain to him your passionate feelings for him. Just roll with it, have a good time and if things feel right then go for whatever it is you want to do / say to him.
The more you over think things, the more complicated things will get. Slow down playa.
Well he's unpredictable person. Just can't figure him out and he's very private and security and trust is what he needs to be involved in relationship I guess. thx - 6 months ago
i don't think you should really feel used, looks like he is trying to be nice, maybe you should kinda joke around with him on the whole boyfriend thing, and you do all this stuff but you aren't dating, id say whatever, ask him out yourself, ya its kinda weird 4 the girl to do it, but what ever go for it, good luck!
Well I'm feeling so, because we meet only once a month. I get depressed thinking he lost interest in me, but I know he's working a lot and when we meet I forget how I felt while we didn't hang out. - 6 months ago
Answerer
Ya, I know what you mean, but how bout trying to ask him over more, make him more interested in u, make him know you like him, and make him know you know he's likes u, and if you can remember how you fell last time you were on a date or what ever wit him, try and remember that feeling all the time! - 6 months ago
ok, if you're feeling this way then you need to get out of this FWB situation. you shouldn't have to feel like you're used. if he's doing this on purpose then that's just callous and petty, and if I might add, rather piggish too. you aren't in a relationship with him so you shouldn't feel like you should hang on his every word, even then he shouldn't be treating you like this. but unfortunately, he is.
like I said before, either you calmly talk to him about it or just drop him like a hot potato.
i think you should sit down and talk to him if it's bothering you so much. he seems like a nice fellow so I don't see that discussing your feelings with him should be a problem and if it does just give him a good smack and leave. lol ok, but on a more serious note, talk to him about it. by sitting here and contemplating on what do and thinking about he's thinking will only cause you to jump into conclusions which unfortunately we females tend to do quite often. you might be pleasantly surprised at what he has to say.
Thanks I guess that's what's left to do for me, because I can't waste my nerves on him anymore and time is too expensive just like for him it is. It's been 8 months we know each other and 2 months ago of sex. I guess either he wants me as girlfriend or asta la vista babe. lol - 6 months ago
Answerer
EXACTLY!!! I'm so glad you've realized this. Kuddos to you!! and remember that whatever happens, it's a lesson learned and don't be too hard on yourself. Cheers! :) - 6 months ago
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