Is he using me?

There are those that are addicted to love and those that are addicted to falling out of love, on that note though cheating on your previous Boyfriend was wrong I would have to say first off leave the Boyfriend you have as of now , people cheat for a reason, one or the other, sometimes both are anything but happy, second with regards to this other guy I will say this , its possible that there may have been something between you to, now I personally think that's a rather large age gap but love knows no age for it is timeless the thing is when you left ur current boyfriend which I think you should, will this other older guy leave his gf, if not then you felt more then what he did sorry if he does then there you go, he felt something similar now that doesn't mean fall madly for him off the bat both of you cheated meaning its a slippery slope and great great great trust must be built but sometimes that certain someone walk by and no matte how much you try and fight it you jut fall in love with someone else doesn't mean you don't love the person before just means you found a new appealing level of love, good luck.

he is not your boy friend. you're his mistress/bit on the side/whore.
to call him a boy friend is obserd and a tool you are using to fool your self.
(sorry if I've got it wrong but your message isn't clear if your calling him your boyfirend, or you do have a boyfriend your cheating on.)

But to answer your question.
Is he using he?

Difficult to say because I think he has been open and honest wih you about what he wants, Has he said he wants to leave he's partner? Even if he has after 4 years it would be clear he has no intention of leaving her.

What do you want out of this realtionship? Is he prepared to give that to you?

General advice, Leave him, youve wasted 4 years on him.

What made you actually end up cheating on your boyfriend in the first place? Is your boyfriend a good boyfriend? Does he give you attention and affection? Does he give you good sex? Is there something missing in your relationship that caused you to cheat?

The both of you seek this thrill of "getting away with it." Your guy's relationship is built around lies and sneakyness because your life right now sucks so much ašs that in order to excite it, you cheat (much like compulsive thieves). Both of you are horrible people who are too afraid to own up to your current life's situation. Rather then dealing with it, you hide and have a pretend relationship without any of the hard work.

You haven't left your boyfriend because you're scared to. You're scared to be alone and what's on the other side of the door when you do leave him (i'm not referring to the two weeks you spend at a friends house either). Got a kid with em? Well obvious he's gonna have to spend every other weekend with one of ya.

"I kno I have done wrong, now I'm trying to figure out the path that is best for me."
- Are you kidding me?

You are asking yourself right now "does this guy who cheated on his significant other with me who is also cheating on someone myself really like me? I mean, he showed me all this attention but when his girlfriend caught him, he stopped? Is he less of a dirtbag than I am to actually take responsibility for other peoples emotions? I don't understand, I thought the world revolved around me and my vagina? Please help me, I'm not a bad person."

Leave your boyfriend, don't talk to that guy and please don't date anyone who values mongamous relationships.

*this has to be fake, no one is this senseless.

you are both asking for an attention that both of your partners could give. if they do,maybe you want to experience something new.

you guys are never meant to be together in the first place.

Maybe you were never anything but a little diversion in the first place. Sure sounds like it.
Why didn't you see that? Couldn't you tell he would never break up with is girl friend?

It's Karma, next time don't be a cheater.

It's possible that maybe this guy actually has a really good reason that he's not communicating with you. Maybe his girlfriend stole his phone or something like that. and what your doing isn't right. maybe he realized that and wanted to stop but ws just too afraid to tell you. but face it. he's either ignoring you or his girlfriend is just trying to keep him away from you. but don't assume one thing and go after him for it. just take a break and relax for a while, and maybe after a while hell call or text you back.

first, yous houdlnt have cheated
second, he shouldnt have cheated
third, why would you date/ (whatever you guys are doing) a cheater
fourth what you guys are doing is wrong
and fifth he's 11 years older then you:|

Maybe he just decided to be faithful to his girlfriend. I mean you say you have reasons why you stayed with your boyfriend and I’m sure there are reasons why he stayed with his girlfriend. I mean you really have to take a look at the whole picture…. And not just think about yourself. You were obviously a mistress, and you knew that. You knew that his girlfriend didn’t know anything and apparently you were or are still okay with that. Don’t expect anything to go much further then that.

But the real question here is. were you using him?

why would you fol around with a guy who has a girlfriend? bacuse that means he doesn't care enough to break up with her for you? that doesn't make any sense why you would want to be used like that becuase he obviously (yes) to answer your question is loosing interest in you

I think you have to look at the situation in a more realistic approach. Both of you are already involved with someone else, therefore, it is what it is.a diversion. Guys will say what you want to hear most of the time. If the he stopped flirting via text or phone because she was watching? geez.he needs to man up don't ya think? If he were into you, it wouldn't matter!
Older men are flatter by younger women and vice versa but a fling is a fling, not a relationship!
As for the both of you, cheating isn't a good thing. If your presently involved with someone and your not feeling it, its time to walk and respect yourself. Cheating only leaves you feeling worse about yourself and is the easy way out. Good luck and to thy own self be true!