How can you forget an 8 year relationship just like that? My ex doesn't care. He has told me he has experienced the pain! After approx 3 months he has a new girlfriend. I can't believe it. Have any of you been treated like this and what was the outcome. Please help cause I feel really really sh*tty x
The best thing you can do is forget about him. Don't let his "recovery time" affect you. If he moves on that quick then he's not worth your time to even think about him. You're better than him 120% kk? Do your best to move on, he's just a dick, not all guys are like this. Put yourself around friends go out and have fun but be safe lol. Don't let anyone take advantage of you etc.. because your in a sensitive state. Stick with friends first and enjoy being single for a bit. And lastly, Keep that dickhead out of your life. If you have his number, delete it. Pictures? Rip them up or burn them. Take him completely out of your life. Don't weven talk to him. Itll make moving on easier and you'll get a satisfaction out of removing the trash from your life :) Hope I helped.
It happens often and to most people. Only thing that is surprising is that it happened after 8 years. I am sure the warning signs were appearing sometime before the break-up but either you did not see it or ignored it.
Also, he seems to be an uncommunicative person. He never told you what was bothering him, whether some thing with you, inside his mind or friends or whatever. He just his kept it bottled up and started thinking negatively and one day just broke off.
Think of it this way: his weird behavior shows that if he had stuck around, he would have caused more problems.
You never forget a long relationship, but some can get over it very quickly, especially if their feelings were fading over time. Dont validate your worth on how long it takes for your ex to get over you, because it will never be long enough. Be happy for the times you had, but understand that that is over now, and you must move on as well. The pain will fade over time, so do what you can to not dwell on this.
Its so hard though. I just can't believe its ended up like this. - 4 months ago
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It may be hard but it may be for the best - 4 months ago
Question Asker
For him maybe but at the moment I feel like it's never going to get better for me. He seems really happy with his new girlfriend and has moved on so quickly and I'm still in a mess. - 4 months ago
Treated like what? Am I misunderstanding your query? I am getting that you are feeling ill used because you broke up 3 months ago and he already has a new girl friend. If that is the case, I am amazed that you would feel he has an obligation to turn celibate and mope around for some period of time before he is allowed to get on with life. Ten minutes after the break up he was a free agent and free to engage in what ever opportunity presented itself. Why should he care about the past? The past is over and done. I must be misunderstanding your situation. It is just too incredible that you would imagine all obligations do not end at the point of break up.
It's the fact that he has rubbed my face in it! After 8 years I just thought I meant more. I was asking people who have gone through a similar experience. I know he's a free agent and can do what he wants I just wanted to know if you are able to forget an 8 year relationship so soon!!!!! - 4 months ago
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Rubbed your face in it? How did he do that? I don't think you included any information on that in the posting. I am sure he has not forgotten the eight years, he just chose to put them out of his mind and focus on the coming years. Seams perfectly normal too me. - 4 months ago
She NEVER said that he was still obligated to her in any way, shape or form. She just doesn't understand the fact that he didn't take any time to grieve over the break-up. He should care about the past unless, in his mind, it was ending before it actually did, in that case he shouldve talked to her about it.. - 4 months ago
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Catt, one of the couple decided to end the relationship. Since she is grieving, logically I conclude that he decided it was done. There would be no reason to then for the guy to not quickly get back to a normal life. He would not be grieving over his own decision and its doubtful he would grieve if it had been her decision. It is 3 months ago, why is anybody still grieving? I could see being sad for maybe a week, but come on that is life, get over it allready. - 4 months ago
Question Asker
A week!!!! you obviously haven't had a seriuos relationship. I was with him 8 years and your telling me it would take a week to get over that long, JOG ON MATE!!!!! - 4 months ago
Answerer
"jog on mate" ? What is the world does that mean? My wife of 33 years is begining to think our relationship is serious. I seem to recall a number of relationships before her. Some the girl ended, some I ended, so I think I have experienced serious relationship. While you are depressed, sad, and seeking help, your ex is happily going on with his life, enjoying each day and looking too the future. If there is an emotional problem in one of you, it is not in him. - 4 months ago
Question Asker
I asked for a little help not to be answered with things I already know. I just struggle with fact that I meant nothing to him and wanted some feedback from people who could actually help me understand. Being a bloke yourself how can they move on so quickly? Do they ever think of their ex? Miss them? and jog on means actually want it says. I know your in a funny weird kind of way are trying to help by telling me to move on and god I have tried but I can't. - 4 months ago
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I have told you plainly, yes it is normal for you to be totally out of his mind by now. The relationship with you is in the past, its done and forgotton. I find your innability to get over this abnormal and perhaps you should concider seeking professional help to deal with it. Oddly, you seem more bothered that he is happy, than that you are misserable. That should be telling you something is wrong with your feelings. jog on mate, run slowly on your spouse? - 4 months ago
No, I don't think that she would be bothered if he waas happy at a later time. How much did she mean to him if he just up and moved on? My point is there must have been issues for him to be able to forget about it soo easily. If he truly loved her and cared for her, his grieving wouldve been longer too. - 4 months ago
Thanks hun for that bit of support. I know I don't own him I was just asking how someone can move on so quickly after so long. He cut contact from day one plus he's now changed his mobile number. He has been the horrible selfish one not me however he has made it feel like it's all my doing and by changing his mobile number he has probably gone around saying I'm mad to his family and friends. It's me experiencing all this pain and him he has had nothing. - 4 months ago
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I understand what your saying, I was with a guy for 3 1/2 years that found someone a week later. I was in tears while he was hanging out with her every night, it killed me. He came back a month later, but I eventually realized that people who really love/loved you, don't move on that fast. I don't care what anyone says, you could be the biggest b##ch and he should still be upset that its over, upset enough to need time to heal. Mine talked of marriage, buying a house together and left again..bs - 4 months ago
Question Asker
Yeh I was with him 8 years and at only christmas we were talking about moving out etc and I always thought we would be together forever. It's killing me knowing that he will never come back and is with some1 else. I know he will never come back it's been to long for that. It's not the fact that I would take him back its the fact that he has never once tried - no contact at all from him. He didn't even text me on my birthday a week after we split. It's the feeling of utter rejection!! - 4 months ago
Question Asker
Its hurts so much that he has never ever tried. I just feel worthless. We were taling about mioving out at christmas etc and now he's with some1 else. - 4 months ago
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Yeh it makes you wonder if they were just saying what you wanted to hear or if they realized somewhere in between that's not what he really wanted. Yes, it makes you feel like you were just something good for the moment. I think sometimes they wanna let go and don't know how, so they just wait and when they do, they don't look back. That's why I told you to write me. I don't like airing my laundry on here but I'm trying to help...You need someone that thinks about you and shows it more. - 4 months ago
Of course he didn't forget you! You can't just erase or forget 8 years of your life. He may have moved on, but that doesn't mean he's going to be with that girl for 8 years. It doesn't mean they're going to get married or spend forever together. If you love him, or you did love him, you should want to see him happy. And that sounds like what he's trying to do, trying to find some happiness. I am sure both of you will have many more relationships to come, you have to let go eventually.
Yeh, someone always tells you something. I told all of my friends I don't wanna know if they see or speak with my ex and that they know nothing about me. Then I found out one of my friends was hanging with his group on the weekends. I don't talk to her...avoid any painful situations and tell people you don't wanna know,. I know its hard, but you have to think about you from now on...Thats what he's doing, and has been all along. That's why its easier for him 2 move on. Think about it..hes me me me - 4 months ago
Question Asker
Yeh I've told both my family and friends that if you ever see him I don't want to know what he's been up to etc. I happened to go on Facebook one day and there he was with his new girlfriend and once again your back at square one. He looked so happy with her though which hurt even more. I don't want to know anything but it just keeps happening. - 4 months ago
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That's why you don't get on Facebook! I'm kind of going through the same thing. I was with a guy for 5 years and just like that, he's gone and moved on. He even took her to on vacation with him and they hadn't even been dating a month. Made me sick. It especially made me sick when she kept asking to be my friend on Facebook. I think she just wanted to keep tabs on me and it rub it in my face that they were together and happy. Stay away from Facebook, you'll realize how stupid the whole thing is. - 4 months ago
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