My ex girlfriend called me on the phone tonight. we hung up like two minutes ago and I feel like shit.
We were extremely close and it was a long relationship that I broke off because I think my heart wasnt in it all the way and forever didn't feel right to me yet.
anyway she called and we talked which isn't weird because we still talk. but after a while we get to talking about our relationship and what happened. She started crying and I acted so cold, but I couldn't help it. She says she still loves me and she's hurting so bad and I just don't understand how I can be so emotionless. I feel terrible that I broke her heart but I'm not heart broken myself. why?
how do I let her know she's special without lying and saying I want to be with her too?
and why do I not care so much that we aren't together anymore when she's such a mess?
Be yourself. if you think that you still want to be with her then why not go for it. Everybody deserves to have a second chance. But! You still have to be sure of what you really feel. Actually, I can say that you just still want to be again with the girl because you just feel guilty for you made her cry and you feel that she is miserable without you. Well, it's just my opinion but it's a good thing you still consider how she feels.
Maybe you just feel in your heart that you made the right decision. That's what it sounds like to me. I think you feel bad cause you care about her and don't want to be mean and hurt her, but when it comes to BEING with her, you just don't feel like it's right. I would just tell her that you care for her and you're sorry that she is hurting.but be honest.don't let her feel led on.believe me, that's the worst thing you can do. Honestly, you may want to consider cutting ties for a little while. You being around is probably really hard for her to heal and move on. You never know.maybe with some time apart, you may grow to miss her.but if not she'll have time to heal. Good luck!
It's no big deal that your not that upset about it expecially if you didn't have very strong feeling for her the one way you can say you care is to say " I care about you and you know that just because were not together doesn't mean I don't care" you can also throw in a sorry about breaking her heart if you want to. but you ned to make sure you don't lead her on.
Hey man, I've been there. Now is the time to decide weather or not it is worth it. I broke up with my ex, and about 3 weeks later, I realized I had given up everything that mattered most to me. I was stressed about my job, my lack of personal time, and felt like I was spread so thin that I had no time to enjoy my life. I made a mistake. Right now she's destroyed, but in a few weeks after that goes away, she's gonna be over you. I want my girlfriend back desperately right now, and after I apologized and have spent a month trying to fix it, still nothing. She said she had to "force herself to move on, and that she dosn't think we can ever love like we did." In my case it was the best thing to break up for a bit because it made me realize what matters most. I felt cold and indifferent about the situation at first. I'll tell you this right now. You gotta decide if you can go the rest of your life without her. If she's the kind of girl who will never leave you, will always put you before herself (you have to be willing to do this for her too). Me and my ex are both Christians, and we share the same morals, principals, and attitudes about doing the right thing. If this is the case, I'd urge you to really think it through. I look back and realize how good I had it. I'm 24 and it's getting about time for me to settle down. It took me giving it all up to realize I'm ready, and God willing, I hope I can get her back. I suggest sitting down and just talking. Just put in your mind that maybe you are wrong and be willing to see who's fault any of the problems are. Point out any problems you both have and make a promise and effort to work on them together. Don't be afraid to swallow your pride. Anyone can love anybody, it's just how far you're willing to go to make it work out. It sounds like she's a really awesome girl who does love you. My best friends said those same words to me and I was too stubborn to listen to them. I suggest staying and trying to make it work. Take it a day at a time and tackle each little problem one by one. Instead of saying "I don't know if I can put my heart into it." look at is as if "I'm going to do my best to put my heart into it. I don't know if I thought there was something better out there for me or what, but looking back, I was a fool. I beg ya not to make the same mistake. You just need to tell her what you're going through and ask her to meet you half-way and help you. You gotta do the same, but the end result will be worth it! I'll be praying everything works out for you!
I think you should tell her, she's really special and beautiful, but you don't feel like she's the one for you. Tell her that there's someone for her but its not u. Don't tell her you love her as a friend, during this hard time you should avoid using that famous phrase because in your case it will only make matters worse. I think after you have a serious talk, you should stop talking for a little while because this could help her get over you sooner. Since she still is attracted to you, talking to her will only add to her feeling of hope. Hope to getting back together, when In reality you don't want to get back together.
So I think you should try everything that I just said.
James100 is crazy. Don't settle for something you have no desire in. If you don't want to be with her, then don't. There is absolutely no reason for you to stay in a relationship that you don't feel anymore.
You don't care so much because you broke it off when she still wanted, and wants, to be with you. I've been in her situation, as most of us have or will be, and it hurts.
Just tell her she's special, but make it clear that you don't want to be with her.
A favorite quote of mine is this one: "Why go round the mountain, when love's only next door?"
Be nice to this lady. Give it another try. Love is not about how you feel about a certain person, but what you do to fill them with happiness and joy. Show profound love and kindness to this lady. Refuse to break her heart. Be selfless and geneours of mind and heart. Then will your own heart be filled with tender loving feelings.
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