Pelase help! I want my ex back!

depends on how you left it and if he really wants to get back with you he will let you know but for now just give him space and don't try to think about it too much cause it will affect everything else that you do and then you will look like the one whose screwed up.

It depends why did he break up with you.
If he is not in love with you, then maybe you need to change that aspect of yourself that he fell out of love with. Or you can move on.
I noticed you are also too clingy. You think about your own needs too much. If he knows that you want him desperately because you are looking for him everyday, then he will lose attraction and you are not winning.

If you want to win him back... you need to stop asking him questions and shut up honestly. Guys don't like girls who ask questions and not have the answers to anything.
They want a girl who KNOWS what's going on.. who has SOME control.. SOME power..
He doesn't want you relying on him too much.
Cause he knows that if he leaves you, then you will be left with nothing. Which will make you look smaller than him. Which is a turn-off.

Golden Rule: The guy and the girl in the relationship should be about equal. One shouldn't want the other one desperately, and the other one doesn't even know what he wants. That's a relationship that will fail, unfortunately more for the desperate one.

Hey Cutie
I'm reminded if you love someone.
You let'em go and if they come back to than it's meant to be

Let go cause if you truly love him like you say, you can move on without him. Breakups are never fun for anyone. Just pick your head up and be happy that he was in your life and now that chapter has ended and another one will begin when your done with your pain. Sorry but you have to let go, for your own sake.

Too much to read o.o

Good luck!

are you and your ex back together? I went through what you have gone through. it'sabout not being available. its about just giving him time and space, and hanging out wuith friends and family..take time for you! he will come abck around if you let him realize what he is missing

i think personally give each other sppace I kno 4yrs is a long time wit a person. just give him nd yourself space to rethink everything try nd distract yourself so ur not so wrappd up in da depression try settin a night out wit da girls. You guys can stay friends up to you 2 just dnt keep bringin up da past relationship if he chooses 1day that he wants you bak den he will bring up da conversation all I can say try nd meet new people nd get out more so ur not thinkin bout him as often. You should advice him da same too. Good luck I really hope you guys come to sum mutual agreement.

You sound whiney... If he wants space give him REAL SPACE... not 2 days, or 2 minutes, or 5 seconds... Give him 3-4 months to be on his own... and to decide that he misses you...

What I think about this is you should just move on but if your really in love with this dude then ill tell you a way that always works for me.
But you have to do exactly what I say
PLAY HARD TO GET!
but not just hard but really hard!
You have to make him think that your moving on like "i can't wait for you forever"
Then you have to make your self look good! don't put on any weight by eating all those chocolate and icecream while crying over him, and every time you see him tell him your doing better and even thinking about going on those blind dates your friends are trying to set you up with.

Make him think your happy to be single even tho your dieing deep inside that your not with him.
Give him a lot of space not like see him once a day but more like once a week or even once every two weeks! make him think your busy doing other things and not thinking about him

Your an independent woman and you can find any guy with the snap of your fingers!
First learn to appreciate yourself!

Right now he doesn't even know what he wants only time will tell. But the first step is to kick his drug habit. Then you can listen to what he has to say. When he does find out that you told his parents, he will blame you and say he hates you. When he gets the drugs out of his system, he'll apologize to you and tell you how grateful he is for saving his life.

Sometimes people relapse and spend years trying to get it together. Just be ready to move on if he doesn't have consistant sobriety for more than 9 months over a 2 year period. Be prepared to go on with your life without him. You may not want to think this way, but you should learn from listening instead of experience in this case. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Be careful and go to the meetings I suggested so that you can get a better perspective of what you are dealing with.

Sophie, you should go to link! If you insist on staying with him then you need to listen to some other people who are in your position. You should experience life to its fullest and I'm not going to try to deny you the drama of being in a relationship with someone who is addicted to drugs. Sometimes experience is the best teacher. Either it's something that you invite into your life without the wisdom and experience of really knowing what you are inviting in or you make a different choice for yourself and "Run like hell".

So, I'm giving you some more wisdom that you may not want to hear:
1. You are in control of your life and make your decisions and therefore control your future.
2. You are thereby responsible for your own happiness as well as your own misery.
3. You are only able to control your life not anyone elses. You may be able to provide insight if the person is willing to accept it. (The same as I am discussing your issues with you)
4. No matter how much you love him, he has to love himself more. You cannot love someone so much that they will change for you.
5. Sometimes, the more you try to help someone the less you really help. They become so dependant on you that when you get tired and leave they go overboard. (Addiction Only)
6. It's 2009 and there is a self help group for everything but whatever you need help with (in your case you need a group that supports people who have partners and family members with drug addiction)
7. Your guy can't love you until he loves himself. He doesn't love himself because he's in love with drugs and alcohol. So, until he kicks the habit his words are Bull-Shit!
8. When he's high on cocaine he's going to be mean as hell and obnoxious. When he comes down he's going to profess his love and apologize.
9. It never gets better, it gets worse... So I hope you know what you are getting into.
10. When he gets mood swings, it will cause you stress and you will have your own mood swings in reaction to his mood swings. Hence the number of messages you are posting. You are confused because your dealing with a drug addict...You're supposed to be confused, it's part of drug addiction to confuse the people that stay in the relationship with the addict.
11. If you really want to know what's going through his mind, join a CA, AA or other Anonymous Drug addict group as an addict. Listen to the people say over and over again the things that they did to people they love and how shameful they are for their actions. Listen to all of the scandalous things they did and how many times it took them to get it straight. When you've done that, think about your X-boyfriend and whether he is worth it. Then go to the Al-Anon group and listen to the families and etc talk about what they've experienced w/their addicts.

I know you may not even read this or think I'm being mean but I'm not. You are not dealing w/a guy who is in his right mind. He is not in control of himself!KRL

Sweety, if he's on drugs then you can't reason with him. Talking to someone on cocaine is like talking to a window. You can see what's on the otherside, but you can't get through it! Move on, it's really not worth your time to deal with at such a young age. If he wants help, he will get it with or without your help. You can do bad by yourself. Don't waste your time or let him drag you down with him. You're sending updates like every 10 minutes ... did you mean to do that or are you cranking?

ok after reading all this I really think you should just move on... you don't need someone like him to keep bringing you down... your depressed.. why be with someone that will just depress you more because he can't make up his mind on if he likes you or not.. or you have to deside if the drugs/ drinking are affecting his thoughts... just let it all go

Update 3: Say it, do it, show it, prove it! If a guy is sincere with his words, he will demonstrate it through his actions. This is a lesson that you should learn while you are young so that when you are 25 your are not on GirlsAskGuys.com asking the same questions or have any confusion. If you are really that confused, ask your father how men act when they sincerely care about a girl. This is a piece of cake "EASY".

Update 4: If a man really 'likes you' you don't have to do anything to find out. And don't listen to Xakrael; he is just wrong. Don't talk to the guy as he advised, JUST WAIT to see if the guy approaches you. But again, the guy is not your boyfriend anymore. You told him that you were getting him something and that was your choice. He probably just got you the rose because he felt guilty for not getting you something. I was waiting for the other part to come out. So, now the picture is clearer! He felt obligated. Girls do that stuff all the time and then cause their own confusion. Don't go buying stuff for guys that are not your boyfriends. Every girl should listen up! It's an attention getting act and you end up spending too much time questioning his actions and what they mean. Again, it didn't mean anything to him. As a matter of fact, it meant less than what I thought before because he was trying to make himself feel better by getting you something. It wasn't even sincere.

Next time if you do choose to give to someone, then don't tell them. Just give it and don't read anything into the gift. A rose is just a rose! It doesn't mean that he misses you, or wants you back or anything at all. KRL

LOL I'm not a Sour Puss, LOL I just have a lot of guy friends and male family members that are real men who have given me insight early on. I am not a child and have been through the same things that some of you young girls are going through. I can see game coming a mile away as well as sincerity also. When I hear of young people getting all excited over a guy who clearly does not care it upsets me because I know how fragile your hearts are at your age. Now I'm not saying don't trust, I'm saying don't be so gullible and foolish. If you start out like that, it either becomes a pattern or you will start mistreating good people. So be careful with your heart and don't read into things that guys do. They are so simple and don't ask for much. It's your life and your future, the choices that you make and patterns that you set today will affect your choices and patterns when you are an adult. Just think about it and I'll try not to comment on this anymore. Good Luck!

Yep... considerably! It can damn near drive a guy crazy knowing that you won't return messages, answer his calls, text messages etc. It's the curiosity thing and then slight embarrassment for constantly contacting you. When I wouldn't accept my X's calls he started calling me from other peoples phones and screaming through my window.

You just have to be strong enough to not contact him for a while... meaning weeks or months not days. Think long term and meet other people and let his friends see you out with other people. He will have to call, cause it's just too much to handle. Time is your best friend.

your kinda stalking him... lay back and let him think about things ... if he says there is nothing to talk about then there is nothing to talk about right now... and why where you in his van looking at receipt hun? that makes you look like the crazy ex ( not saying that you are) you guys were not together so it should not have made and difference and you should have NEVER laid a hand on him for that... you could have been arrested for that if he really wanted to do that... slapping him will not make things better for you... give him his space and the time he wants.. when he is ready he will talk

i completely agree with KRL answer. don't chase him. don't call him. let him miss you. let him realize what he has lossed. he can't do that when you keep talking to him and visiting him. move on. this works trust me.

I know this is going to sound backwards, but if you simply leave him alone and don't contact him or his family in any way, then he will come back. Guys like to pursue women, not get pursued. But are you sure you want him back because going out with another woman doesn't seem like his intentions are to get you back!

If he does come back it will be because of his ego, not because he loves you. The friends thing never works, it's just an easy way to just have sex with you without committment. He gets the best of both worlds in that case, so don't have sex with him!

The 'you never know one day we could get back together' thing is bull-shit and said to keep you hanging around. Don't hold your breath for that day to come. Move on with your dating life and meet some new guys or at least hang out with your friends. If you want him back you can't let him know that you are sitting around waiting for him. Guys like girls that can move on because they know they are special. Good luck! I know this is probably not the answer that you want to hear but it is what you need to hear if you want him back. A girl who just sits around waiting for that guy is percieved as a loser cause she can't get anyone else and is weak. You will want to appear strong and able to move on if you want him back; cause no one wants a loser! KRL