I got my second chance in college with this girl after letting her slip away in highschool because of shyness (lost contact for about a year, then reestablished it once I found out she was going to my school).
I first start with a group thing which turned out well. A few weeks later me and her go out to dinner alone, the whole thing lasted about 3 hours and it turned out great, and we parted with a hug. Considering how well the first two meets went, I worked the nerve up to call and ask her out on a real date. dinner and movie (old fashioned I guess) and she replied pretty quickly with "okay" in a pretty good tone. the word "okay" kind of bothered me but not that much. The time comes and she cancels on me due to a sudden family issue, which I'm okay with. Considering the time of the semester, things got busy so I suggested to her instead of a movie and dinner, which we can do later when not so busy, we should do a coffee date for now. just to hang out and talk which she said sounded nice. Tho it took me nearly a month to set this coffee date up as some weeks wouldn't work and she canceled on me twice because of a sudden commitment but didn't explain much. I started to think she was one of those girls too nice to come out and say they didn't want to go out, so I seeked some advice from a friend which led me to call her and say "would you like to go to coffee or dinner this week with me or would you like for me to stop asking you?" but in a nice, unmean way. She explained that her canceling multiple times does look bad but she had a busy schedule and that she did want to go with me, which gave me good insight to why it happened and let me find out she wasn't just tryin to dodge me. We eventually go out and talk for about an hour over coffee because she had to go after that for a commitment, and I thought it went pretty well. Near the end of the semester I pretty much tried to reschedule that movie/dinner date after finals and what not and she responded with "I think we can make something work." It's been a month into summer now and we still haven't done anything, I've had multiple contact attempts unreturned (ones asking if she wanted to get together) and so decided to back off for a bit (and waited for her to finish summer classes so she could catch up on her major as she changed it, plus she lives 45 minutes away from me) and just chat whenever I could get her. What's giving me mixed signals is the fact that I always had to initiate the conversation and plans (even in between the meets) and always took several weeks to work out each meet (so all 3 meets took place over a span of two months or so), sometimes she seems interested and other times she doesn't. The summer classes are coming to and end and was planning on calling and asking her to get together, and wondering if this would be a waste of time. What do you think?
Oh wow. This is a hard question to answer because you are right, she is giving you mixed signals but if this girl was really interested in you, she would give it to you straight and want to make the effort. But In my opinion she probably is not interested in you and just doesn't want to be upfront about the situation. But on the other hand, she is quite busy and may just not have the time to be in a relationship. I can see you really like her, but would you really want to be in a relationship with her when obviously she can not commit and make the time for you? I think you should give her the time she needs to figure out what she wants. and if she really wants to be with you she would make an effort to be with you. It is hard to do, but I really think you should move on from this girl and try finding someone who has the time to want to be in a relationship. Good luck!
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