I have a girl I really like. We went out once and it seemed like we really hit it off. She said a friend of hers asked her why she was talking to me when she had a BF. She told me she told her friend the guy wasn't her boyfriend.
We met at work, but she quit right after we went out to work at another job that pays more (she works two jobs). So I didn't talk to her until four days after the date to tell her I had a good time. When I asked her out again, she said she had something going on with school and that would be everyday, and didn't know her schedule yet. I asked her if she was saying she wasn't available, she said no, but that she would let me know. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and called back a few days later. She says she still didn't know her schedule. I asked her if I should call anymore (it sounded like a blow off), because I didn't want to bother anybody (I also don't like to waste time with someone not interested). She said I could still call, but that she might be available on wednesday but wasn't sure. It sounded to me like she was dating the guy her sister was talking about (my schedule is just as busy as hers, and I think if you really want to, you can make time to see someone) and was blowing me off but keeping me around. I called two minutes later (she didn't pick up) and left a message saying I felt like she was blowing me off, and probably was dating the guy her sister was talking about, and that I was out of there.
I wasn't sure, so I called back a week later. She confronts me about the message and says everything she said was the truth, and that it showed her I have no patience. I apologized and told her my side of things. She said she wasn't sure, so I told her I would let her think about things and call back later in a week or two.
Now girls, did I do the right thing? Is she telling the truth or just putting me on hold? Was it a weird patience test? How should I handle things, should I date others in the meantime (I really like her, or I would not have called back the second time)?
Well lets just say that you should go after somebody else and not keep wanting to go out with her to see if things really hit it off!!!! It sounds like to me that she might have a busy schedule with school and she's not lieing to you and she also might have a boyfriend and she probably doesn't want to tell you because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings to bad or at all!!! So I really think that you should leave it go and go find a different girl and get to no her!!! This other girl maybe you guys are better off as friends and nothing more just the way it sounds.
If she calls you at all and asks how you are I really think that you should tell her how you did feel about her and well you kinda moved on and you just want to be really close friends!! So my advice is to just move on and find somebody else but still keep in contact with her as friends!!!
Yep I agree with April 100%...she's right it works both ways even if your schedule is packed you would still find the time for that's person...like April said call in 2 weeks, nothing happens between the 2 of you just move on...Good Luck!!!
You probably should have asked her in person instead of leaving a message, but that doesn't make you a bad person. Assume she's telling you the truth unless you find out for yourself otherwise.
I can't say I'm totally sure about this. But the mention of the other guy made me think: Maybe he's a friend that she's also interested in, but it isn't going anywhere. So she's telling the truth saying she doesn't have a boyfriend and she's been busy, but maybe she's not moving forward with you because she's hoping something else will pan out. Ya know? She's not lying but I think if you feel like she isn't conveying the entire truth to you she may not be.
I say proceed with caution. Don't call her in a week. Give it two weeks. Then call her and make it casual. Tell her you want her to meet you for coffee or someplace for a bite to eat. Try to make the next contact with her in person so you can read her body language. That may give you a better feel for what's going on.
I think along the same lines as you... if she's interested she can find the time. I know I used to work a full time job and two waitressing jobs and I still found time for friends and boys- especially ones I was interested in. If she puts you off again I say let it go. Either she really is too busy which means she's probably too busy for a relationship or she's waiting for you to give up.
Thanks for the answer, I appreciate it. I have another question for you though, why would a girl wait for someone to give up? why not just tell them you are not interested? - 9 months ago
Answerer
Sometimes people find it easier to ignore the issue instead of telling it how it is. She may not be wanting you to give up. That's why I say meet her in person if possible to get a better feel for what's going on. - 9 months ago
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