I have been best friends with a guy for about 1. 5 years now. I am separated from my husband for over a year (live in different cities) and he (my friend) is single and has very old-fashioned values. His business recently failed and he's trying to get on his feet again. He doesn't have an income or a car now and this bothers him tremendously. He has many sleepless nights as a result. Also, his dating profile says he will only date a woman that is single, divorced or widowed. More about that later.
We spend several hours/day together. I am the first person he calls in the morning and the last person at night. He has never refused to do something for me and when I'm out of town he says he misses me "and I never miss ANYONE". I've told him that I love him and he said "you do? I love you too. I'm not sure how it happened, but it did. "
We have often laid in the same bed together and he snuggles me and I him. We often travel to other cities together and sleep in the same hotel bed. He's kissed me on the lips several times. Nothing more than a soft peck. But he says we just have an "intense friendship" and I'm like his little sister. Recently he was talking about another female friend and said she wanted to kiss him on the lips. I said "just give her a sister-kiss on the lips" and he quickly said "there's no such thing! ".
At one point we had a 45 minute conversation where I asked him why we shouldn't be more than friends. He said he didn't want to be in a relationship because he has nothing to offer. I told him I don't care that he doesn't have any money or a car. Toward the end of the conversation he said "I hear you when you say that you don't care about that, but I CARE ABOUT THAT! ". And I think because I didn't leave it at that, he then said "it would be creepy dating you because you're like my friend Kevin. " I think he said that to end the conversation because what could I say to something like that? When I asked him why he's on a dating website, he said it's just for entertainment. Not to find a mate.
When we're drinking, that's when he really opens up and says things out of the blue like "just finish up your divorce already" and "i've never felt this way about anyone and I'm 35 years old! ". Then the next day he says "all bets are off when we're drinking. It doesn't count. " I believe that people let their guard down when drinking and he says that isn't true. That people have no sense of reality when they're drinking.
He's always flirting with me, acting goofy around me and constantly touching me or pinching my tummy or slapping my butt. When we hug, we hug way longer than I do with any other friend. In fact, I don't even hug other male friends and he seems reluctant to hug other women around me. The other day, I went to an event where he was volunteering and I saw his eyes light up. He kept smiling and fidgeting.
He seems to act jealous when I go out on a date with someone. He'll ask all sorts of questions - repeatedly.
I can't answer that one, but I can say that I am going through something similar. since I'm a guy I feel that maybe he does want something more than a regular friendship. however he does not want to rush anything or feel he is the cause of you making a decision that he feels he forced on you. my problem was that I was trying to force answers and I was being a douche. I told my friend that I didn't want to talk anymore until she got her shit straight
Wow, you two seem to be more than friends but both of you are in denial about it. I would definitely resolve the marriage thing before trying to see what's up with him or any other man for that matter.
He wants you but he has a lot of issues he needs to work out first (like a stable life). From the outside looking in, I would think you two were a couple,.