What is chemistry between two people?

Question

Not the branch of science. I know plenty about that :D

But chemistry between two people? What does it feel like? How do you know you have that? And does chemistry only happen with people who like each other?

I'm wondering if I have chemistry with this guy. We get along great. he's friendly and kind. I'm usually shy and socially awkward but some how he was able to bring me out of my shell and get me talking. I even feel comfortable with him. He's not very attractive but for some reason I feel drawn to him. I feel happy when I'm with him. Its weird but sometimes we say the same thing at the same time. Or we finish each others' sentences like if we knew what we were going to say next. We have some things in common but not others. I like him so I think about him a lot. And whenever I think about asking him something, the following time I see him, he'll mention it without me asking. He even asks me what I want him to ask me. basically, everything just flows.

I don't talk to a lot of people, especially guys so I don't know if this is normal. I barely realized I like him so its not like I force these things. And I don't know if he likes me. I want to think so, but idk.

Anyway, what's your opinion of chemistry?

Dragonblood21 · Accepted Answer

There can be a few different levels of "chemistry"

Chemistry is really just your brain just saying "yes" to the question of, is this person attracting me? Many people have certain qualities they find attractive, and when a person possesses those qualities, you are drawn to them. If they are drawn to you as well, through your qualities, people then refer to this as chemistry between two people. That's all there is to it.

So that being said, there are levels that you can feel drawn to someone. Physical appearance, personality, and interests all give different levels of attraction, depending on what is most important to you. I find that the person you begin falling for needs to have a combination of one of those two. To further explain myself:

When a person is physically attractive, lust is the emotion felt here. This feeling of lust can be switched to the next person that is either equally as attractive, or more attractive.

When a person is attractive from personality, they can grab your attention when the didn't have it before. Some people can go entirely off personality, but it may be difficult for the attraction to stick. Since physically they don't turn you on, and interest wise you don't mix, it can cause you to want to friend this person, more than view them romantically.

When a person is attractive by common interests, this is gives you ground to stand on, and lets conversation go easily between you and the other individual. Though, if you don't get along with them at all, sharing interests is likely not going to matter.

When a person has a mix of all three, you almost certainly will fall for them. This is when "chemistry" is at it's strongest.

markml · Accepted Answer

Broad question.

Chemistry is all about potential. Kind of the same as the science subject, where you talk about "potential energy" formed by chemical bonds.

Chemistry doesn't define what's going to happen, but it's how you perceive what could happen.

It's also influenced by how much of an optimist or pessimist you are at any given moment. If you're being an optimist, you will see potential in a lot of places and in a lot of people. If you're not, you won't.

secretlyshy · Accepted Answer

It's like a guy who finishes your sentences, or a woman who’s so easy to talk to. You feel like you can be totally natural around them. People who share chemistry are able to be completely comfortable around each other and when there is chemistry, you just know. When two people have chemistry and they talk to each other, they almost feel like they’re talking to themselves (not literally talking to themselves but in the sense that they have so much in common, they are like the same person).

Chemistry is like when people talk about how they know they are in love. It's one of those things that doesn't need to be said, because you both just know. It's a bond between two people.

Personally, I think chemistry isn't only reserved for people who like each other. I think chemistry is more like the way you interact with one another and how you feel when you are around them. I think a lot of times, however, friendship chemistry turns into love chemistry, because when you think about it, all the qualities you look for in a best friend are also the qualities you look for in a partner. That's why it's so common for people to say "I'm happy because I married my best friend." or "I'm so lucky to be in a relationship with my best friend".

To me is sound like you and this boy definitely have chemistry and I think you should totally pursue it. He sounds like he;s a good match for you. Hope this helped some :)

alonely · Accepted Answer

Your description of what you guys have sounds exactly how I was going to answer your question when the conversation is effortless, meaningful even when you are talking about the most trivial things, that's part of chemistry. You feel right being around him. It feels like all of a sudden there's another part of you that you didn't realize existed. It feels easier than a regular friendship-more right. You coming out of your shell with him is a manifestation of your comfort with him, another indication that there is that "chemistry." You may feel like there is no one else in this world who understands you better than he does-not even yourself. You may be able to hear a story here and know exactly what he means, either from personal experience or the heightened empathy that shows up with the chemistry. That being drawn to him and being happy exemplify it. Feel lucky. You found it by accident. I did too. Not everyone gets off that easy.

If you've found something this good, go for it. If this eels different from other fruitless crushes, if it feels so strong to you, chances are he's felt it, too. If not, then you let it go with a "no hard feelings" to him, a pint of ice cream, a scar on your heart that makes you stronger for next time, and a best friend who will get you like no one else does.

Good luck, darling. You're lucky no matter how this turns out.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I think we all agree that you answered your own question.

what you have is great chemistry. the only thing I'll add is that good chemistry has many forms. One of my best friends is a guy who I feel all those things with except attraction. We clicked so well that people wonder why we never got married, but we just don't have "physical attraction" kind of chemistry. I also have a current situation, where we have loads of chemistry and attraction. Both can be described how you described your situation with this guy.

I think you already know whether or not it's platonic friendship or more in your case.

stubbsy · Answer

chemistry within a relationship is when two personalities get on, like cheese and onion or salt and vinegar, they get on, where as water and oil do not, oil refuses to mix with water by floating on top, this is how you define chemistry, if two people get on well without really knowing why, this is a good chemistry, also you can have bad chemistry but still get on, ie where you always argue together, but remain good friends,x

Girl1991 · Answer

You just answered your own question. Kudos.  Now you just have to find out if he likes you and go on an official date.

Anonymous · Answer

That's truly chemistry with the guy you're having at the moment.

Chemistry comes alive when there's a deep connection and bonding between people that they can get comfortable and trusting of each other.

Yes, he does like you a lot.

Toffeepea · Answer

Chemistry is when the conversation just flows like water. Slience is never alkward. And you both accept each other without judgement. Honey chemistry? You got it!

Anonymous · Answer

chemistry is when two people just go well together, they get butterflies and can't stand to be apart.

neversurejulianne · Answer

to me, good chemistry is when you feel like it's nice and "easy" to be yourself with someone. Great  chemistry is when you've been talking for hours and you can barely remember what you where talking about :)

Anonymous · Answer

Chemistry is a special bond between two people which brings them close to each other and make them feel happy forever...

Anonymous · Answer

I learned in health class that chemistry was when certain hormones get released in your brain.

What is chemistry between two people?

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