What do you think?

Anyone who works in family law in the United States knows that women often fabricate these tales of abuse, often with the encouragement of their dishonest attorneys, to get a more favorable divorce or palimony settlement.

Women in the United States are generally a manipulative and mendacious lot as all of us who have spent any time here know.

They are also just as physically abusive as the men, any police office will tell you that as well--except for some of the women officers who will lie for their sisters.

True, they are much weaker on the average so they don't cause as much DAMAGE by their abuse, but only our feminists take that as some sort of justification.

We all know this.

Obviously I don't know anything about the above example and of course the woman could be telling the unvarnished truth, but CLEARLY no intelligent person in the US would take any action based on unsupported accusations given the above facts.

There are 3 sides to every story. There's what happened to one person, what happened to the other person and the truth. The truth usually is in between what the people say. I can see where you are coming from with what you said. The manner in which it was delivered was a bit harsh. The best way to approach it is from a place that isn't so accusing. I find responses that point to my experiences or even a broad audience is better than saying "you didn't.you did" etc etc.

I agree with your point, but I think it was poorly executed (no offense).

People post questions on this site every day, and there's no way for us to know whether or not they're telling the truth. Regardless, it's not up to the rest of us to play jury. If sweetangel2008 actually reports her husband for abuse, he will get to state his side, but she only asked for advice, not a verdict.

I also think it's normal for someone in her situation to point out her husband's flaws. She had an affair--she feels guilty. Explaining what her husband does to mistreat her is her way of rationalizing her own actions. Honestly, I don't necessarily think she posted her question because she wanted advice, I think she wanted someone to condone her behavior.

Should people be allowed to plead their case before they're labeled guilty? Yes, of course. But the alleged victim deserves the same respect, and your response to sweetangel2008 was full of accusations.

All-in-all, this is the internet--there's no such thing as a battle won.

I think that the husband does deserve a chance to have his say! But most of the questions on the site only tell one side of the story, and as we all know, women tend to band together when there is an abusive man in the picture!
its pretty hard to get them listen to a man accused to domestic violence! And its true, he is immediately condemned, and I agree with you its wrong, but I do think that nothing makes violence right! Even if its just hearsay!
I must stand with the women on this one!
sorry! :-(

I get your point. My brother used to go through hell with his crazy ex, and when I mean crazy I mean like dangerously crazy. She would always try to provoke my brother so he can physically hurt her, so she can take him to court. My brother came crying to me once because he was about to hit her, he was so pissed at her and at himself for thinking that way. She is a really cruel woman and she had a way of convincing people that she was right and he was wrong! I know my brother very well, and I know for a fact that he will not hurt anybody! He moved out of his own apartment and stayed with me just to stay away from that devil, because we knew she was trouble and and being around her might make him do something he will regret.

I remember one time she started arguing with him for a stupid reason, I was there by the way, and she went ballistic throwing stuff at him breaking things. She just went mad. I swear to God I wanted to HIT HER so bad! My brother just stood there.

Thank God they are not together any longer! So, I do agree that men should also present their side of the story. There are also abusive women out there!

No, I'm Satan's dark army. You can't have that title. lol!

First of all, sweetangel2008 is just saying that she has a problem with her husband. We don't know who sweetangel2008 is, or her husband, and we don't care. She could be my boss or next door neighbor, but she is just like the rest of us, asking for an answer. true, a guy should have his say, but he's not going to be on this site (I don't think so) so it doesn't really matter if the guy is going to argue his side on this site right now. If she does drop him, then it would go to divorce court, and there they can decide how to settle it. She didn't go into detail of how abusive he is, or what he does, so that does make us curious. Your comment is not that disturbing, but if you knew her well, then more info on her side would be needed.

Not against you dude.

Hi, in this case I disagree with you, because:

This is an anonymous internet forum.
It doesn't bring the woman any benefit accusing her husband of something that has not happened.
So why should she lie then?
Also, the husband does not have to face any negative consequences, since no one knows who he is.

In RL, you'd definitely be right though.

This is ridiculous. Both these girls and you, jbone, have blown this out of proportion.

Firstly, those women are failing to see your point, and you're failing to see theirs.


If someone on an anonymous internet forum asks for advice about something, like spousal abuse, do you REALLY F****** think we can just WALTZ UP and ASK the husband? DO YOU HONESTLY THINK that's how an advice forum works? What possible knowledge do you have of abusive situations? If a husband really is abusing his wife, THE LAST THING HE NEEDS TO KNOW is that his wife is seeking help. I shouldn't have to explain to you what might happen if he found out. This is an internet help forum site, and giving that woman advice on how to combat an abusive relationship wouldn't harm anyone. If the husband isn't abusive then she'd have no use for the advice, and if he is, then she does have a use for the advice.


So what if they demonize the husband on here, it won't hurt him. If he isn't an abuser, he's fine. If he is, that woman now has advice she can use. That prospect of "Oh that man deserves to make a case" is utterly foolish of you to think OVER AN INTERNET HELP FORUM.

The idea is to protect her, and all you'd be doing is saying, "Hey husband, your wife is trying to escape, better beat her harder". Do you think in real life women go to their husbands and say, "I've gone to the police over your abuse." No, not often, because most of the RUN AWAY.

The man will ALWAYS have his side of the story IN COURT, and that is only where it matters.

Remember, it DOES NOT matter if that woman was telling the truth. Why? NO ONE KNOWS WHO THE HUSBAND IS. Why? Advice on abuse only works IF YOU'RE BEING ABUSED. Why? Because if she wasn't being abused, IT WOULDN'T MATTER.

I suggest you watch Sleeping With the Enemy. It has Julia Roberts in it.

The abuser will have his chance to defend himself, when the abused is safe and away from the abuser's grasp. Ah man.

Its not a good hill to die on. I used to work in a battered women's organization and there was that presumption of guilt. The reason for this this is when the accusation finally comes up, it is generally because it has some basis in reality. The difference is, of course, that is really easy to trump up a story on the net while showing bruises is a little more problematic if you don't have them.
I spent a lot of time under the gaze of people who seemed to think it was only my wife's professed intention to kill my in my sleep that kept my inherent desire to beat and savage women under control.

Yeah, it's a silly position to advance but it is a fight you won't win.