I'm 50 and my wife is a couple of years older, but we've only been married a couple of years. Two years ago, she was interested whenever I was. A year ago, she started to lose interest. Now, I have trouble knowing when she's interested. Worse, she doesn't make any time for us alone. She's always been close with her daughter, but it got worse a year ago New Year's, when her daughter became pregnant with her first child. We had made plans to celebrate our first anniversary by staying at a motel with a Hawaiian-themed room. Three days before New Year's Eve, she called me and said she had to work at her part-time job for someone else who wanted off. She couldn't understand why I was upset, even though we had been planning this for three months. Our grandson was born in August, and now, all she makes time for is him. Don't get me wrong, I love him and enjoy seeing him a lot also. But we haven't had a date night since last spring. She's also started complaining when I do nice things for her, like getting the car door or offering to carry groceries for her. When I bring up doing something, she's always got something planned with her daughter and grandson. Last night, I was running the sound at my church for Maundy Thursday service, while she had a seminar for work. I came straight home after the service and waited for her. Finally at about 10 pm (seminars usually get over between 8:30 and 9), I called her cell phone and got no answer. When she arrived home at about 10:25, I commented that it must have been a long seminar. She laughed and said she had gone to her daughter's to play Wii. She didn't let me know, so I could join them. We hardly spend any time together as it is, because we both work full-time and she works two jobs. She works with her daughter, then spends as much of her free time as possible with her, to the exclusion of anything else except our grandson. I guess I'm really asking if I'm just being too sensitive or whether there's something wrong with our relationship. She won't talk about any personal issues, especially if they involve feelings. At times, she lets me know she loves and appreciates me, but it feels like I have to initiate EVERYTHING. Sometimes, she even gets mad at me for bringing it up. HELP!
I'm just a young guy, but my parents are in their 60s and have been grandparents since I was 13 by my two sisters who are considerably older than me. So I can tell you some changes I noticed in my mother, who is probably in a similar position as your wife (she worked full time as did my father). First, when the first grandkid came along, she totally changed. We spent a ridiculous amount of time around my sister's family (who lived quite a ways away, but we were at her place at least once a week). For other reasons I ended up moving out when I was 16 (under good terms with my parents, not because of anything bad) and at that point I was pretty much out of my mom's life. We'd e-mail about once a month but ultimately she didn't really seem to care anymore. On a higher level I knew she still loved me, as did I love her, but there was almost no action to show such a thing. Her life, for a while, became her grandkid's life. I imagine this had quite the effect on my father as well, since she wasn't just "targeting" me with her infatuation with the grandchildren. It was like she had her own kid again or something.
Here's some good news though, my mom eventually got used to it and went back to "normal". It took a few years, probably 5 or 6 to get down to only seeing the kids once a month or so. But the fact was, she simply (emotionally) could not keep up the pace of seeing them so frequently, tensions grew between my sister and my mom over the frequency once my sister was comfortable with caring for the kid (obviously at first I'm sure my mom gave plenty of mothering advice). I'm sure every woman is different, but if nothing else know it's possible for her to change, but you might have to wait it out a while.
Ok, this is my first time on this. I'm 40 my wife 30. My wife and I have together for about 6 years, married for 4. We're great friends but like every...
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My husband and I have been married for 10 years, and I am really ready to give up on having a sex life. I am 33 y/o, but I feel 80 y/o because my...
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
My first ideal date could simply be out to dinner and then a movie or it could just be going over his place and watching a movie or doing something. I don't really care what we do as long as we have fun. either way id wear something nice. probably a black mini skirt and a tight white tanktop with lace and with a shirt over it and definitely cute black shoes. and the date would end with a kiss.
Afterwards..what will your date know about you?
After the date he would know that I'm nice, fun to be around, sweet, funny, confident, and cute.
And the picture I know I was at work, waitressing.
(Age:18 to 24)
When: 3 months ago
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