Me and my boyfriend of a year and half recently separated and were just taking a step back to fix the things about ourselves to make it work because the past 4 months have been rough. My problem is he has done some things in the past that have made it hard for me to 100% trust him.
But I want to again. I do not know how to learn to re-trust him if I we have to solve our own issues separately. And I am very insecure when it comes to him having girls for friends and I do not know how to be secure with it! It's making things worse! SOME ONE HELP ME!!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
Men by their hormonal nature are polygamous. Unfortunately that is the truth. And baby boomer years made things easier for them. So the women who succeed in keeping their men with them deserve lot of praise.
Provided you both have the same work hours, the rest of the hours are entirely under your control to keep the other girls at bay. If your working hours are different, change yours to the same as his.
You should plan your leisure hours in such a way that both of you share the activities together. But don't give him the impression that he is under constant surveillance even for short, solo outings. It is not very easy for a man not to succumb to the charms of a loving woman, unless he is abnormal.
Always give some allowance to the possibility of blaming each other once in a while, backtracking to the incidents that led to the estrangement. That is human nature. Change the subject quickly by a loving gesture like a kiss to remind him all that is history. As trust build ups both of you will forget it.
All this if you are in for a long-term relationship. If it is a short-term rapprochement, it is not worth the bother.
You are doing the right thing as taking the step back, and you have to look at it as what is out-weighing you guys good vs. bad, and see can you gain from him.
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What pickup lines do you use to start a conversation with someone you are attracted to?
- Excuse me Miss, I was watching you from over there and I have to say that I just love your smile. It makes me happy just to just sit and watch you smiling. Could you please do that again?
(she hopefully smiles and gives up a sweet happy laugh)
- Oh dear, you just made my day - both a lovely smile and a lovely laughter! Thanks for making my day, Miss.
How do they typically respond?
Well, to be honest I haven't tried it yet since I almost never go out nowadays, but I wouldn't hesitate it I was to be in this situation. The way I do it, I would not be pushy or anything. After my last comment I would probably leave her for now, but try to bump in to her again later that evening, smile and ask for that lovely laugh again. And then maybe, we can start to have a conversation.