Do guys or girls ever get over their first love?

Question

xxibgd · Accepted Answer

If you mean get over as in forget them?
then Never.
Even the most forgetful man won't forget something that he cherished... and lost.
You hang onto that stuff. For every knock against guys and their lack of clarity in the moment, they have lucid, Rain Man abilities to look into the rear view mirror of hindsight.

Guys remember things like:

The first baseball card they shouldn't have traded away.
The GI joe, Star Wars, and any other action figures that disappeared at the hands of the donation box or the vacuum cleaner.
The comic books they left in their fort in the backyard the night it rained.
The decisions to quit the swim team, football team, drama team, and jazz band prematurely.
The notes, looks, conversations, hugs, and exchanges that were actually opportunities.. That were overthought, underperformed, and missed altogether.
The glory days that could have been if it weren't for an injury, a bad call by the referee, or the coach that sat them on the bench.
They remember battery acid in the stomach feeling of mustering the courage to finally tell the girl how he feels about her.
He remembers the triumph, the drama, and the heartbreak of committing himself to his feelings for her. He plays each move and countermove over and over in his mind.

She was the chess match he neary won. But like a great competitor, he uses his poor moves, strategical errors, and missed opportunities as a playbook to prevent such mistakes from happening again.

The love he finds later in life is the victory that was made possible by remembering all of the previous defeats.

Yes, he remembers everything.

sincerely
Not a loving black man

Hunterboyz · Accepted Answer

Get over?

You'd have to define what you mean by "get over".

I have to say no.

As bad as you want to be over them, its almost impossible to get over that person.

You keep telling yourself that you don't love them, but you know its a lie.

Thats all apart of you trying to convince yourself so you can move on.

Deep down though, you miss that person like crazy, but you know it probably wouldn't work now.

The fact you're interest are in this Q&A should let you know that you never get over them.

This is a dedication to all of the 1st loves in world...We will always have a special part in our hearts for you.

Sincerely,

A Loving Black Man

HUNNYBUNNY1 · Accepted Answer

No they don't, my first love was in high school. We ended up parting ways after high school. I dated guys but could never keep a relationship going because I always thought about him. I went on and got married and had a child but for some reason I could not give my whole heart to my husband. We ended. 3 yrs later I ran into my high school sweetheart and it was like we never left each other. Now we are getting married in June. If they do you wrong, you will always have a spot in your heart for them but you will find somebody who will come sweep you off your feet and make you forget about them. But all honesty they will always have a part of you. I hope that answers your question.

daisy622 · Accepted Answer

Depends, like my first "love" was not as strong as the next love of my life, It took me a little under a year to get over my first love... and it's been over a year and I'm still trying to get over my second love... I guess you could argue that my first love wasn't love like my second was, but I believe there are different kinds of love and you will always care about the person but eventually you will fall out of love with that person.

mybets · Accepted Answer

No I do not feel you ever forget your first love. Your first true crush, and or first real kiss. I was 10 he was 11. He had to move when he was 14. My first love gone. But as time has passed after 30 + years of no contact, with the help of facebook, we found each other again and are living together like we have never parted. True soul mates. Thank you God for bringing him back to me.

Aristotles · Answer

No you never get over them. If you sealed your soul and body with them. They are your first love and you are married, and so is all others you deal this with but they are afterwards. A part of you always lives in them and a part of them in you. The pain and suffering and all will pass but not that what you shared. In a perfect world all first loves will be together for ever and never separate. Unfortunately we have false views on what sex, marriage and love is and mess around with it not accepting the consequences but thinking it something to play with. I agree in total with "hunterboyz".

utopus · Answer

Not really. That doesn't mean we'd like to get back together, but there is always a special place for them.

NotSoBad · Answer

Again I mean it depends on what you mean by "get over"  I spent 6 years almost everyday with her. In the end she broke up with me and I hated her for it. Afterwards I realized who she really was and how she really treated me. I don't see her as the same person anymore but, more like a person that changed over time. I will always miss that girl I first met. As for the girl at the end well. . . My life is now much better without her.

cerealpirate · Answer

well ... I just got out of a 5 month relationship that I swear to the good lord was the one ...

I fell so hard that her leaving me was the most painful thing I have ever been through and I can say it will take many months - years to get over her. I can honestly say I was "In Love" for the first time. so yes time does and in my case will one day heal a broken heart but will we ever get bast our first "Love" only time can tell ... for me at least. good luck

kateem · Answer

Yeah..You move on, but I don't think you ever fully get over them. I mean it's your 1st love, first time you ever really experienced love with the opposite sex, so it'll forever be a milestone in your life.

teri819798 · Answer

It all depends on the person. I know some people who are stupid enough to do rebound romances not long after breaking up with their first love. I know a girl that did and because of it she ended up marrying and divorcing the dude as well as having his two kids.

DeanW · Answer

I agree with utopus and Genesis5.  As time passes you meet others, but there's always a special place for that one and a feeling that has faded but never lost its essence.

EmilytheNukeE · Answer

I don't know that, for me, it's a 'get over'. I definitely got past the feelings. But the fear of a significant other's family, the gut feeling that says a guy's attention is wandering? That stuff I never lost.

Baby-Gurl · Answer

No one really completely gets over their first love because that's the first relationship in which you've had and expressed strong feelings.

missamanda27 · Answer

The song "Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad" by Meatloaf is one of the saddest and truest songs. You really have to pay attention to the feeling in the song and the lyrics or you won't understand, but that song sums up getting over your first love better than anyone else could explain.

allen-jamee · Answer

Hey, I can so tell that tale. NO WAY! I can never see myself getting over my first love. But the difference is that I will always love him. But I won't have the same love for him. I see him so different now but I would still do anything for him. Why? He was my first love. Don't get over him hun. You'll go nuts trying to make yourself forget him or her. Just move on and know that you will never forget that One.

ChandrasekharGoswami · Answer

I would say it depends on a bunch of factors. In my case I recalled our memories for the first few months. However, I could move over the time and did not feel any vacant or feeling for her. Again it's depend on person to person. Some guy may overcome this in a short period of time and some may need more time to recover. The depth of your relationship, your personality trait, your surroundings and the way you broke up- these are the key to determine the duration of your sad time!

Zillidan · Answer

Usually they do, at least for my stand point unless you keep getting upset about it over and over again then yea you could still be upset with it.

dreamgirl · Answer

You still have a special place for them in your heart even if you have moved on as they were your first love.

lady-v916 · Answer

Yea, most of the time you get over them. But you still have some feelings for him.

Do guys or girls ever get over their first love?

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