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Should I just leave him alone?

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Anonymous User (Age:36 to 45)     When: 5 months ago
Views: 138     Category: Break-Up
I tried to contact my ex that broke up with me. He is dating a girl he spends all his time with. He only wants to be friends now, but we dated for years. We chat on email but only about being friends and me being happy. Do you think I should just not contact him anymore and see if this bothers him? Or is he just over me that fast? We broke up 2 months ago and did everything together. I want him back. Is it hopeless?

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smiley
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smiley (Age:30 to 35)      When: 5 months ago
Don't contact him for a while. This does 2 things, first it will make it easier for you to move on if you don't hear nice things from him. Second, it could create a "fear of loss" if you are no longer around to make him feel wanted, plus you won't irritate him and drive him away. Many people don't like the idea of friendship after a relationship, but I get along very well with most of my ex'es. If he contacts you, try not to talk about your relationship, let him know that you care about him, but never cry or beg him to come back.. That almost never works. good luck.
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What Girls Said

poison-ivy
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poison-ivy (Age:18 to 24)      When: 5 months ago
Don't contact him. give him a chance 2 feel how he'll miss you so badly. but..if he's not..then there's no point 4 you 2 wait 4 him. get over it. I know you can do it. you go gal!!!! I through the same situation also..slowly I can get over him. if he don't need u..then you don't need him. find yourself out.
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kiamia
626  
kiamia (Age:18 to 24)      When: 5 months ago
Oh I know so well how you feel, I had the same thing going on, I never really got how the guy can move on so fast! And this is something that really hurts. BUT I GOT OVER HIM!

I tell you what to do - concentrate on something else, go somewhere and do something, keep yourself busy, that is the only way how to fight with the temptation to contact him.

Remember, try to live one day at a time, don't think about tomorrow (other than that it will be easier each day). Try to win the little battle and do not contact him today. Tomorrow do the same.
I wish you the best luck!
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kiamia
626  
kiamia (Age:18 to 24)      When: 5 months ago
I think it is great idea not to contact him anymore, but I also know it is not as easy to do as say. At the moment it seems very difficult to imagine your life without him in it, but I agree with Pallas, it is time for you to concentrate on yourself.

I don't think he is over you, but if you keep contacting him he will never realise that because he is just so used to having you around.

So try not to contact him and when he does contact you try to be as easy-going as possible, showing him that you have also moved on with your life like he has.
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Question Asker I think he is over me. He is with her all the time now. I have not contacted him at all this morning and he hasn't emailed or anything. He doesn't care that I am hurting so much. How can he being sleeping and doing everything with her already? - 5 months ago

Pallas
118  
Pallas (Age:25 to 29)      When: 5 months ago
Break-ups are so so hard. He's already started dating someone, and I'm not saying it's hopeless, but you should also put yourself out there and start dating other guys. Also, lean on your loved ones - your friends and family - so that you won't keep thinking about him. The hardest thing about breakups is restructuring your life around yourself when you're so used to being with the other person. It's like you don't know what to do with yourself or you don't think that you'll find someone who understands you in the same way. But you will! Try to contact him a little less at a time. It'll get easier.
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