Regaining self confidence and self esteem.

When your moving about try to control your actions; a lot of actors kind of take their time in controlling their movements so they look smooth on camera. Now I just try to relax. Kind of like the actor; when you see a girl and you think about approaching her (even asking for help in a grocery store) just take a second to relax and calm your breathing. Like when I was shy I used to do this to get over that "flushed" feeling, you know, sweety palms, kinda quick pulse. If the same happens to you, then try to control your breathing and take it from there (same theory as in martial arts, and I guess with dating it helped me start to take control of my actions after I got over my nerves). Then just relax and smile. Not a huge smile, just an easy one. And then like what do you notice about her that you can bring up for a conversation. What's she wearing or carrying? Is she working? Does she have an accent? Where is she from? Is she listening to music, ask about that. And that's just questions. Jokes are good, too. Humor is something that can give you all types of outlets for a conversation, it just depends on what your joke is about. how many times have you gone "haha that's funny but you know what! that reminds me!" ... Too much I bet. Learning the little things about a girl from what you notice and what you are going to say will make or break your conversation. But once you start talking, pay attention to what she is saying and be ready to slip in a funny remark to make her smile, or a common story to relate to her; in trying to see if there is any chemistry, something like that. The more you put yourself in positions to see how women react to how you present youself, the more you will build help your self esteem towards talking to a women you just met; when you learn what to say and what not to say by trial and error. Start by just keeping an easy smile as you do your errands and talk to the girl who is working, wherever you are doing your errands. If you are shopping for clothes, you can ask a girl for her opinion between a few shirts or something and go from there. Just keep it friendly to keep your mistakes low until you feel more, and more confident in approaching and starting a small conversation that ends up in you asking the woman if she wants to hang out; or get a cup of coffee or a drink somewhere, and then take it from their and the over the next couple of times see how you can make the setting more of a date; see if she go for a movie or a diner or whatever, use your imagination as to how you think she is going to have a good time. Take it in a more step-like process than a huge leap if you have too, relax and smile, then your confidence will show a lot more. Hope I helped. And good luck!

This is gonna sound kinda harsh....but before I say anything in grade school I was picked on...in high school I started picking on people.

Grow a set of balls. You're not made of glass. If someone makes fun of you...hit em, kick em...go f***ing ballistic. Who cares? You know what.. I've been hospitalized because I was beaten so badly.. but I didn't care.. I stood up and did my best. Shit happens dude.. Bruises only last so long.. Living a life of regret is forever. Quit thinking about what you should do and just do it.

And that said-just treat a girl properly. Not too sweet and all that crap but be honest, don't lie and just talk to and listen to her. Make sure you ask about her.. Not just rattle on nervously about yourself or some stupid thing you just came up with. Ask her about her....show you care to hear what she has to say. Because that's all you can do. And just hope it gets you where you wanted(though you'll learn very quickly girls can be mischievous little shits-sorry ladies....)

ps-and if you have the ability I do to turn any situation into something funny....make sure you use that quality sparingly. yes a good little laugh here and there is good but too much and they'll think you're always kidding around.

these are all just things I've learned from my relationships and breakups. Listening to your girl is the most important thing. Even if its about nail colors, hair dye or anything.. listening is the ticket.

When you say dating, are you talking about just asking a girl out, or the whole approach?

And do you try talking to women on a just friendly basis; like at a school, mall or grocery store? Or do you just keep to yourself as you pass by like, just running your errands and that's it?