I've been friends with this guy for about 3 months. When I was in Miami for Thanksgiving we talked everyday. When I came back we hung out at his place often. Watching movies and talking. When my boyfriend would come over to my place he would get jealous and invite someone over to his place and try to make me jealous. Which I wasn't. He texted me while I was out shopping and said he was falling in love with me and he knew it was wrong because I have a boyfriend. We texted often throughout the day. We hung out a lot. He's like a smoker and a drinker and I have never done those things in my life so I used to try to help him stop hurting himself. Well I told him my boyfriend and I are about to get pre-engaged and I texted him to let him know I missed his company. He texted back and said don't say that because your getting married. The next day he was supposed to go running with me. I texted him and he never texted or called back. I called him later that night and told him that he disgusted me as a person. He had stopped calling me, txting me and would front around his friends and not even speak. Last night I decided to end the friendship altogether because he didn't treat me as a friend anymore. He sounded said but I didn't care. My question is: What is going on?
Update: He also knew that I had a boyfriend. Yet he kept trying to pursue me. He even made moves on me. I did not lead him on in any way to think that we would be more than friends.
4 months ago
Wow. Do you really not see how all the questions you've asked fit together and make sense? Do you seriously not understand that you created each one of these problems yourself?
Anyways, I can see from your critiques of the others that you only want input from those who agree with you. Generally speaking though, if you want a good relationship with a guy, don't talk to another guy every day, go to his place to watch movies, and have an emotional thing with him. The only boyfriends who won't be pissed off by that are the ones who don't care or who are cheating themselves.
You totally lead the second guy on and then blamed him for being human. Bad karma.
The problem is you. You have a boyfriend but yet you are pursuing another man. This guy is looking for a relationship and you are either
A. Playing head games leading him on and making your current boyfriend jealous. B. Sick of your current boyfriend and looking for something new.
You are obviously interested in this other guy. He is the bad guy that you want to change. You say it yourself in your question. "He's like a smoker and a drinker and I have never done those things in my life so I used to try to help him stop hurting himself. "
First off you have to make up your mind on who you really want to be with. Telling this other guy that you are getting "pre-engaged" was said to make him jealous. You also have no right to be upset if your current boyfriend is hanging out with another girl based on what you say you have been doing. I wouldn't be surprised if your current boyfriend left you. This new guys is smart he is doing exactly what any normal person should. He is seeing a problem and he is applying his solution. (cutting off contact with you)
He knew that I had a boyfriend the day he came down and asked me to take his number. I was outside waiting on my boyfriend because it was our anniversary and he took the initiative. The first day we talked I let him know I was only looking for a friend. - 4 months ago
He really did like you and deep down in side you liked him, you can have a crush on someone else and have a boyfriend or husband. He stop dealing with you because you told him you were getting married in his mind no more friendship with you. He like you so much he is willing to let you go so you can be happy. Don 't get mad at him this is his way of dealing with loosing you. Thank god he did not start any mess with your boyfriend.
You said no to him. It is the same thing as rejecting him Love happens in the strangest ways. Becoming friends with you the thought of liking more than a friend did not trigger yet. It was a slow process. So meanwhile you are thinking he is just a friend he is actually falling in love with you. He was hoping that maybe he had a chance with you if he told you how he felt. Again it is hard to be with a friend that you have feelings for so that is why he is backing out because it hurts him.
He told you that he was falling for you but you said you had a boyfriend. You rejected him. Its hard for him to be friends with you because he is in love with you. So he backed off, he wants to forget about you.
I did not reject anyone. When he met me I had a boyfriend. I told him I wasn't looking for anything more than a friendship. I didn't lead him on to think it was more to it than that. I was honest with him from day 1. - 4 months ago
Answerer
Things happen. What can you do? He got to know well. He sees girlfriend material not a friend. That is his thought. So he is being honest with you now. So just let it go. - 4 months ago
Well he pretty much said it. He was falling for you and you have a boyfriend. You can't have both so he let you go. Ending the friendship was the best thing. I don't think telling him he disgusted you as a person wasn't right, he just felt hurt. That is why he did not respond. If he was a good friend you could have shown him a little more compassion. He is the one that lost out in this. Maybe later down the road you guys can be friends again. He was just hurt.
He disgusted me because he kept making unwanted moves on me. I didn't want both. I am madly in love with my boyfriend and he knew all I wanted was just a friend. Which is what he claimed to want to be. I was honest from day 1. - 4 months ago
Look he really did like you and knowing that your getting married really brought his hopes down would you like it if that happened to you I don't think so am just trying to tell you that what you told him really f***ed him up that why he's being like that to you
I'm not getting married. Pre-engagement is a commitment. I never got his hopes up as if I was going to date him. He knew I had a boyfriend the whole time. Him making moves on me is effed up. I was honest from day 1. - 4 months ago
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