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I'm not allowed male friends or any friends at all.

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Anonymous User (Age:25 to 29)     When: 4 months ago
Views: 142     Category: Relationships

is it OK that my man spends all of his time around other women ,using them (in his own words) for his benefit .we haven't had sex in over a year and he hasn't even been that way towards me ,I'm convinced he's having sex with someone else,he says its just that he isn't interested in sex anymore ,he only cares about money.when I complain about him spending time with other women regardless of the circumstances he says I'm pushing him away.but I'm not allowed male friends or any friends at all that he doesn't agree with,not even my family members are allowed around me and the children without him kicking up a stink.what his problem.do I believe he really is being faithful or is he trying to isolate me and feeding me lies


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    From Guys  
5
From Girls  
5
 

What Guys Said

DrJones
1948  
DrJones      When: A month ago
He's trying to isolate you. That's why he's trying to separate you from *all* your male friends *and* your family. Dump him immediately. Call the cops when he comes after you.

That's not a typo. I meant "when," not if. Get out right now.
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Menomacal
65  
Menomacal      When: 4 months ago
Leave him. You deserve so much more.
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BrettH
3058  
BrettH      When: 4 months ago
i would really love to know why you are still with this guy.. I'm assuming you are married to him. witch in that case sad to say but probably best to get out of that relationship. he's gonna just be more controlling as time goes on so why are you putting up with it?
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jacquesvol
11497  
jacquesvol      When: 4 months ago
Are you living in Afghanistan, Iran or Saudi Arabia perhaps?
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InquisitiveMale
2452  
InquisitiveMale      When: 4 months ago
I'm not even going to read the article. The title is everything I need to know.

Its ether okay for both of you, or it's not okay for both of you.
There are no appropriate double standards.

MY opinion, not yours.
Cheers.
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What Girls Said

A-Soldiers-Wife07
3491  
A-Soldiers-Wife07      When: 4 months ago
I got one question:

Why are you even still with this guy?
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serm416
993  
serm416      When: 4 months ago
De ja vue...I just wrote to another women right above you how also has a loser for a boyfriend.

Does any of what you wrote seem a little one sided? It's all about him and what he wants. Where is YOUR self respect. :LEAVE and find a boyfriend who WANTS to have sex with you because you are the sexiest, most beautiful and interesting creature man ever made!

Get it? You deserve a full relationship and right now you just have some guy you hang out with who is extremely selfish and is USING you...for what ever you provide. He's not just using other women, he's using you to. Answer this for me...its this REALLY what you wanted in a relationship...because if the answer is no...(and trust me it should be) then you already know you need to be strong and snatch your life back...no matter how much you may think you love him. Don't focus on that - focus on what you're dream relationship should look like and realize that you are wasting your time loving someone who clearly isn't in love with you...

And as for the last portion of you essay...that is an abusive relationship and you appear to be in danger. Pack you bags and go home to your family. IMMEDIATLEY - or go to a domestic violence shelter. Isolating someone is just ONE sign of abuse. Realize he's controlling all aspects of the relationship and no where is it equal for you - which you have every right to have.

Let us know how it goes please. I'm worried about you and your children.
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meplusabeemer
3360  
meplusabeemer      When: 4 months ago
So, he gets to do whatever he wants and you're expected not to see other guys and be his "convenience." Where's the equality and respect? Aren't those two vital factors in a relationship among other things?

I agree with you that he is probably getting whatever he can from other girls, including sex. Of course he won't admit this. In addition, this also explains his lack of intimacy with you.

I am not sure what the "allure" is of this arrangement or this man. I think that you are worthy of a man who will only want to be with you and will treat you well. I think he needs to go.

This is my opinion but the decision is yours. Good luck.
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Anonymous User
N/A  
Anonymous User      When: 4 months ago
he's cheating on you and trying to isolate you so you will only have him to fall back on and be dependent on him. don't be stupid (not saying you are) but use common sense and not listen to the bs he tells you. he is lying point blank. the situation is not right at all. if its okay for one partner to do it then the other partner should be able to do it too. if he has a problem with you having male friends then he shouldnt have female friends.

honestly you need to get out of this situation because he is setting you up to be dependant on him, that's how a lot of abusive relationships start out.
1. he withholds sex from you. honey he is a man, he spends time with other women but hasn't gave it to you in a year? I hate to be harsh but he's giving it to someone.
2. he spends time with other women. oh hell no how do you even put up with that?
3. you are not allowed to have male friends but he can spend time with other women. you need to check him on his bullsh*t instead of being so passive. that is wrong and you shouldnt stand for it.
4. you are not allowed to have friends that he doesn't agree with. girl stop this man is not your father. stop letting him control you like that
5. you're not allowed to have family members around. often abusers will isolate their victim because they know they are doing wrong and don't want you to have a support system. your family loves you, you need to have them around you in your corner. stop listening to this fool and get back with your family, your gonna need them.
6. get out of the relationship. if you stay with him and continue putting up with this situation I can't feel sorry for you. you need to get out and not expect him to change, the man clearly treats you like garbage what is the benefit of being with him?
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Starling
1521  
Starling      When: 4 months ago
I'm confused, You guys are together but haven't had sex in over a year?
and what exactly is he "using" them for, if you only suspect he's sleeping with them?
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