I was with my ex for five years. At the time of our relationship we were deeply in love. I ended up breaking it off with him because we had different life goals even though I knew I still loved him.We have been broken up for two years now. We haven't seen or talked to each other face to face since things ended. We are both in relationships now but I always hear through others that he asks how I'm doing. I would love for the chance to just be able to catch up with him.I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable by just popping up out of nowhere wanting to chit-chat. It just doesn't sit right with me not being able to just bust it up with him after sharing some much time together.I would love to remain his friend.Is it sane to consider a friendship with someone you use to be in love with?
Some people can be friends just fine, others can't. It's been my experience that in the long run it'll cause headaches between you & your current beau and him and his current gal. Out of respect for whoever I'm seeing I generally make a clean break from my ex's. You sure he's asking because he's interested or is he just asking a mutual friend to be polite?
I believe he asking as a friend which is what I want. - 4 months ago
Answerer
Then give it a shot, what have you got to lose? - 4 months ago
Question Asker
Well..I don't want to make a fool of myself if he just wants to keep a "clean break" - 4 months ago
Answerer
Were his goals the only thing keeping you apart then? Because people's goals do change, what happens if his goals are similar to yours now? What would your boyfriend think about all of this? - 4 months ago
Question Asker
I honestly don't know what I would do If are goals are similar now. I don't think I could be in a relationship with him again. I think I would rather have him in my life as a friend only. - 4 months ago
Answerer
Sounds like you're just gonna have to chance looking foolish and put yourself out there, be up front about wanting friendship only. Consider what you'll tell your current boyfriend. - 4 months ago
Hun it's not crazy at all. But by wanting to remain friends with him: 1. You may jeopardize your current relationship; esp if the guy atm loves you, he is very very likely to get jealous at your ex-bf very soon, even if he doesn't show it. It's a male thing. 2. It means you still have feelings for him.
The only way you can really be "pure" friends with him is seeing him with others around, like your boyfriend or his girlfriend around. This may sound weird but it's a really sure way of keeping the conversation between you two "sane" and plus, if you can really be friends again, there is nothing to hide :)
You guys shared a past so a part of you will always remain with him, no matter how tiny it may be. But wanting to be friends with him I assume you want to make something wonderful out of this. So clear yourself of any "guilty-conscience" feeling about your ex-bf, and I'm sure things will turn out fine :)
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(Age:25 to 29)
When: 4 months ago
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