Well I work with this guy... and we kinda have a friend with benefits relationship, but we don't sleep with other people. We never stay the night together, we don't talk on the phone maybe once a month, he works out of state/country often and we text each other maybe once or twice a week. I see him probably once every time he comes home from a job. We are very open about our relationship but he tells me he misses me all the time and sweet comments like that. He is coming back to the office and will no longer be traveling, I know we will see each other once a week like before but its been over a year and I feel like there might be more there. We are very passionate and have a great relationship/friendship and I don't want to control him and I don't mind if we even have a title but I would like to know where he stands... what do I do? There are times when he doesn't response to my messages or ends up having to cancel plans because things come up but then he turns around and does great things for me and explains that he's trying to work everything in the small amount of time he is home... help me...what do I say, what do I do?
I think if you are not sure what to do then things are best left the way they are. If you were going to have a title as you put it, it would just happen. I wouldn't approach him about it quite yet. If he keeps calling, etc, then it sounds like it works as is for him. If he is a busy guy, maybe he doesn't want a commitment to worry about. Sometimes open relationships are fun and teach you a lot.
I agree with you, that is how I felt about the situation. I don't mind the way things are but sometimes you just get curious. Thanks for the feedback. - 10 months ago
Ok your his side girl, you just don't know it. Guys will tell you whatever they think you need to hear to keep you happy and you giving them what they need as long as they can. My friend had a girlfriend for a long time and a girl on the side for almost as long. He fed her lines like your getting all the time. Unless I'm totally off base, if you ask for something serious and more, he'll find a way to shoot it down because he already has the one he wants, sorry hun
Part of me feels the same but he is single and hangs with everyone from work (they don't know about us because its against policy) and people think its weird how he goes home alone. We agreed when we started we weren't a couple. I could be his side girl though. - 10 months ago
Well I'm really shy to say this there's only two things why this is happening one is because he actually has other stuff to do or two its because he is seeing someone else but don't just mind it on my advice but if you do want more answers go to his friends and ask as many questions when he isn't there and maybe you'll get some answers.
I have asked coworker that are always with him and go out with him. He always goes home alone... he flirts but its innocent stuff... I think he might just be scared of the title. I don't mind not being able to see each other that often I'm a busy person to - 10 months ago
It sounds like you want more than he is giving you right now. My suggestion would be to talk with him about how you feel. The sooner you tell him the better in my opinion. If he does not feel the same way you need to end the sex part of the relationship because you are only going to become more emotionally involved and eventually you will get really hurt. On the other hand maybe when you express to him how you feel it can be the start of a new level for you guys to take your relationship.