Here is the scenario: 2 people meet and it is like the 4th of july from first glance. The more time goes by the more intense the connection. Then, through the process of getting to know each other, it turns out that one of them has been married twice, both times were abusive marriages and one was unbelievably brutal right down forced multiple sexual encounters with forced multiple partners. After the stories are shared part of you wants to run but, a bigger part still feels the connection that originally started. Guys and girls, how would you react and what would you choose to do?
Stay with your gut instinct and keep at it. It will be a very long process of gaining trust. Do not make any snap judgments on behavior you see, as there will be many instances of odd and/or erratic behavior. Professional counseling is needed, for both parties. The victim for obvious reasons, and the courter for help on issues arising from the victims behavior and past experiences. Anger will be a common emotion (from both parties), as well as shame, denial and sense of loss or failure. If you are the courter, you must decide if you are willing to invest the time and emotional energy needed to help this person through to normalcy with the possibility of gaining nothing but an extra set of emotional baggage - if the victim decides YOU are not Mr/Mrs Right after consideration. If you are the victim, you must decide whether to allow another potential nightmare (failed relationship) into your already troubled life. Tough scenario with many scary consequences, but the potential rewards (bringing a person out of the dark and into the light) are worth it in my opinion. Good luck.
I would definitely agree with that guy that posted. Stick with it. Previous relationships have nothing to do with the connection you have now. - 9 months ago
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