Girls: How many sexual partners have you had? Am I overreacting?

ummmm

i think you need to look after her. if she's nice in every other way then she's probably really insecure

i waited 11months with my first boyfriend, because I loved him and wanted to wait
then the next guy was kind of pushy, and I only waited like 6weeks, which is a BIG difference and I didn't care about him nearly as much!

then he left me and I found out he wasn't that faithful and since then I've been kind of turning into a slut cos I've lost my self respect

just make sure she knows you don't expect it of her
even if she's always the one making a move - I do that cos I've stopped believing guys want anything else from me and I just want to be wanted any way I can

retrospectively I know this is stupid
but at the time that's how I feel

this sounds a bit emo
but still, don't blame her too much
sex is irrelevant
judge her on her emotion and cute habits and stuff, if you love her

(Y)

Ok so what's her # you never did say what you think of as a large #. I have had sex with 56 different guys. That's not something that I'm proud of, but that's the real #. Do I count the guys I messed around with NO, I don't. Would I round up NO. Would I count the guy's who didn't last but a few minutes YES that's still sex (although not good sex) truth is I was looking for someone to love and appreciate me, I was young and foolish and I thought that giving my body to them would make them want to be with me. Silly huh. Yeah well I know that now, but that does not change my past, and truly there is NOTHING I can ever do to change it. It's something I have to live with. I was sad & lonely and wanted someone to be with, but I went about it the wrong way.

On the bright side I have never cheated on a Boyfriend of mine I don't have a problem with fidelity, or even boredom with a sexual partner. I only want to be with the guy I'm with now. We have been together for almost 2 years and I've never strayed not even once. I've found what I'm looking for. Someone to love and appreciate me.

Would I ever tell him how many guys I've been with, the answer is no I wouldn't, I'd be too afraid he'd act like you are now, and I'd loose him, because of things I did before I even knew he existed. It would be a very hard thing to get out of your head how many people she has slept with. I'd never want to know how many he has slept with & I'd never ask him.

Two.
And she's with you now isn't she?
You, not all those other guys.

For the girl that said anything over 5 for a 24 year old is an insecure person is very untrue. The bottom line is don't judge. If you say that everything has been going great in your relationship and its this one thing that's bothering you than it may be an insecurity on your part. Not judging you, but I know with my ex he was used to dating virgins and I think this made him feel extra special when he was with them, but with me I wasn't a virgin and I think he felt insecure like "what if she is comparing me? " Trust that is never the case. If she's not some nympho slut running around having sex with any and everyone than see her for the person she is and not her sexual past.

If you guys really like each other I think you should work it out I personally have had sex with 7 and been with about 8-10 (can't remember) I usually say I've been with five. I'm with the person I lost my virginity to but we broke up a couple times and I slept with other people then. My bf has had sex with far more people then me even when I lost my virginity to him and it upset me for a long time although it didn't make me not want to sleep with him. He assures me that I'm the best and most attractive he's been with, and I think he's telling the truth. That reassures me but even thinking about him watching porn which I won't let him do angers me. Try to be fair with her even though she been with what seems to be an excessive number of people, she probably doesn't remember them that well or think about them when she is with you.
It's just a matter of whether you can live with it, she obviously cares about you to be honest with you so don't hold it over her head because she's probably trying to put it in her past
But I would have her get tested and use protection.

I feel that if it's bothering you this much than no you are not overreacting. Perhaps you feel a little betrayed by her casualness when it comes to sex. And now you find yourself second guessing whether or not she thinks sex with you is also this casual. Maybe you should talk to her about it and as lame as it sounds express your feelings about this--more than likely she will get defensive but if you keep it calm maybe you guys could work past this. Good luck

Well, you're in the 18-24 age range. I would say that most girls in that age range have had about 3 partners. At 24, if she's had more than 5, she's probably a really insecure person. If you want to continue a relationship with her, you need to make sex, more than "just sex".

Plus, if a girl is lying about her number, she usually lies by bringing the number down. If you think she's lying up, she probably has some pretty serious issues. Maybe she just needs and craves attention and she'll get it anyway she can.

I don't think you should worry so much about it. I have had quite a few sexual partners. Over 40 just talking "straight" sex. Not oral or messing around other ways (which would add a lot more) and all of that was before I turned 18. But when I was in college I settled down and got married and have never, in 10 years of marriage, cheated on my husband. The way she wants to have sex may be because of her experiences, people do tend to like things they have tried, but also a lot of people enjoy rough sex that haven't been with a lot of people. I don't think that is a sign that she hasn't changed. I don't think you should base your feelings about her on how many people she has had sex with, but on how she acts now. Women who have had sex with a lot of men often feel like they have been used and mistreated by men in general, so to have you reject her because of it would probably be heartbreaking. If she obviously likes you and you like her, don't make your judgments on her past and realize that people can and do change.

Well, as long as she hasn't ruined her life, it really doesn't matter. If you like her enough, and if she is faithful to you, you should just enjoy having her in your life, and don't hold her past against her.

I found myself in your same position a few years back. I met what I thought was this nice college girl, and at some point we were sharing how many partners we have had, and back then I was so inexperienced, I could count my sexual encounters with half a hand. This girl on the other hand told me she lost count at 50 guys. I would have never ever guessed it. Like you I felt sick about it, and as much as I tried to look over that, I finally realized that there are plenty of other guys that racked up the same body count at her age, so I figured she would be better off with somebody that had a similar experience.
I thought I deserved better, and well, I just broke it off, and looking back, good thing I did.

Basically, if you have an issue with her body count, then I would then ask the question, can I get over this, and if you can't, then simply come to the conclusion that I did---there are other men out there that are better prepared for this girl, so just go find somebody else that has what you consider to be a 'humane' body count cause if you don't have her type of numbers, then you deserve better, and believe me, plenty of other girls out there that don't get around as much. Good luck.