Did he take advantage of me, or got caught in the moment?

unfortunatley girl , it seems as tho you were taken advantage of, you showed a vulnerability and he took the opportunity. my advice is to try to deal with it on your own as mucha s you can, and don't ever do it again (sex with him) accept that he doesn't want a relationship with you, and in time, you will forget about it

Well you know, you really did nothing wrong with him and you have nothing to be ashamed about. If you want to place guilt on someone, I don't think you can because I'd say it's even. You're sorry for what you did, and he was he for what he did. It's hard to know how he really feels about you, but in some ways I think he really cares for you. If you really like him, even as a friend, then there's no sense to avoid him but you could stop pursuing him big time. It's ok to call or text him sometime so you don't need to hesitate to do that. You can do it just to see how he's doing and to tell him you miss him. There's nothing wrong with doing that and if you do that a few times, it'll really show how he feels about you and if he does care for you. Don't leave someone you really like or love left up to chance or let to be blown away in the wind like sand. If you have any feelings for him whatsoever, don't let those die until you find out for sure if he has the same or not for you. Do whatever you have to do to make contact even if he doesn't at first until you're sure that nothing exists between you and him anymore, or if it's much stronger than you even realized. You'll only find that out by keeping him in the spotlight until you know you need to shut it off, or make it brighter, ok? Don't miss an opportunity that may never present itself again. We only pass through life once because a situation or a set of circumstances only comes our way one time.

Don't worry, I'll help you as much as I can.

The fact is, I was that exact same guy not too long ago. I have a really good friend of mine who is kinda into to me, for as about as long as I have known her. About two years now. Well anyway, she never admitted her feelings for me until way later, about a year. At the time though, I was in a pretty deep relationship.I mean, then I thought it was pretty deep.

Well, soon after I was single, we started talking, she was an inexperienced girl, sexually, and wanted to find out more. I didn't know this at the time, but I soon found out.

One day she came over to my house and chilled with me for a couple hours. She admitted to me that she had never kissed a guy before (I got scared there, didn't know what she was going to say next) and she wanted to learn how. Well things progressed after that, pants never came off though.

I felt bad afterwards, because I really did feel like I took advantage of her inexperience. She told me that I didn't, but I really didnt' believe her. she really got upset when she found out about me getting back together with my ex---this was NOT right after mind you. So then I realized that I had really hurt her.

Presently, and many months later, I am single and she and I are very good friends. She, I believe but she won't admit, has feelings for me and yet does not ever completely act on them. Yes, we have had our hiccups when we are sometimes alone, but they are brief and unawkward afterwards.which is strange to me.

The point of telling you this is because I'm trying to tell you how friends sometimes end up in very awkward positions. I never wanted to take advantage of her, but I know I did. Yes, I got caught up in the moment, but it was no excuse on my behalf.

Your friend did not, I believe, intentionally hurt you. He knows he made a mistake and that he did take advantage of the situation a little. But in all fairness, his instincts, as did yours got fired up. You both got caught up in the moment. His experience allowed him more knowledge of your feelings, thus the blame is more so on him. But you did end up seeing him and like you said, kissing him back. It takes two to tango my friend.

The reason he probably hasn't talked to you is because he doesn't know what to say other than sorry. Anything else would be awkward, I guess.

Relationships never go well when they start off sexually, trust me, I KNOW this. So maybe he isn't the right guy for now.but if you give it some time, maybe you'll find a better match--or he could be. Just open up your options and don't put all the blame on him. If you still want to be friends, things have a way of working out.

Oh yeah, don't expect it to be an easy ride either--situations like these never are.

Best of luck!

I'm sorry that happened. I think the ladies will have a better opinion then me because they may have been there.
The only thing that I can say is that he did stop when you asked him too & he did apologize.
He was a gentleman about the "situation"
I wish that you wouldn't feel used. I understand that it was your first time and we usually have a bit more romantic setting in mind but the heat of the situation sometimes wins.
You did stop when you said that it just didn't feel right. That's good. It's not like you picked some random guy at a club he was a friend. No one knows what he is thinking but maybe he feels bad about it too. You forgave him so PLEASE forgive yourself too.
I don't think that your any less of a person & you showed a lot of guts stopping!
I hope that you don't continue to beat yourself up over this. What's done is done.
I also hope that the ladies can help you more than I have.

Sorry to sound harsh here, but grow up. Take your conversation to an adult level and, by the way, many adults don't have adult conversations around this type of topic.

The fact is that both of you did what you did. Stop beating yourself up over it and stop beating him up over it. Certainly it may be disappointing to lose your virginity in a way you didn't want, but it happened and is done. I don't think you can push all the blame over to him. You knew whether it was consciously or not what you were doing.

He is probably feeling very miserable himself, I assume you are both religious and he is probably beating himself up over it. Call him and have a conversation with him. Tell him that you are sorry about what happened, but it has and now it is time to move on. You can still be friends.

how often does he usually call you and text you? he said he didn't want a relationship so I wouldn't expect him to call/text you more than he usually does because he wouldn't want to give you the impression that he was more interested in you after that night, he could also be feeling a bit bad about it since you said it was moving too fast for you. Wait and see what happens, if he doesn't text you why don't you text him and suggest hanging out within a larger group of friends and you can see if it's awkward or not, although it might be after that. it wouldn't be fair to say if he cared about you as a friend that wouldn't of happened, because STUFF does happen! so I hope you don't feel bad about the situation, don't dwell on it, I know you lost your virginity this way but it really wasn't an awful way to lose it so try not to worry. I hope this helps a bit xxx