My man looks at porn to much.

I personally think this is very disrespectful. Especially since you have addressed the issue with him and asked him not to. What kind of role model is he going to be for your child? I think you should sit down and have a talk with him about it. Ask him why it's so important to him etc. Let him know how you are feeling. You are not acting like a child at all. I hope everything works out for you. Good luck!

Some answerers are being extremely judgmental here, so I thought I would throw my 2 cents in for good measure. First, you do not specify whether he is looking at porn with your kid in the same room or not, you only mention "my child's father". If he is viewing the porn in the same room as the child, that is definitely a problem for the child & his/her Daddy. Daddy should view in another room away from kids (& you apparently). As dakadan wrote, I think you are "but a product of our society which has also taught many women that if a man is looking at something like that it is disrespectful." There is absolutely nothing wrong or disrespectful with a man (or a woman) looking at porn (of any type, color, variation, theme, level of weirdness, etc.), as long as it does not interfere with his/her or their spouse's &/or children's life. By that, I mean if you are supposed to be preparing dinner & you are looking at porn instead, there is a problem. If you are supposed to be getting ready for work & you are looking at porn instead, there is a problem. If you are supposed to be watching the kids & you are looking at porn instead, there is a problem. If you are supposed to be making love to your spouse, & you would prefer to look at porn alone, there is a problem. Otherwise, look, oogle, spank the monkey or rub one out, etc without a care, because it is something you enjoy & it is not interfering with anyone else's life. Now, the fact that you told him to stop means (at least to you) that it is interfering with your life. But as SoulMedic points out, you should find out "why he is so heavily into porn", or if he is even into it "heavily" or not. What is the meaning of "heavily"? 6 hours a day, week, month? We need to know the viewing habits of your baby's Daddy before any of us make any further judgments on his behavior. You don't give us much information regarding your baby's Daddy's porn viewing habits, other than he likes to sit on a computer (hope he isn't using water-based lube-what a shocker!) and you don't want him to. Why Not? Could it be that you are intolerant of his looking at Sports Illustrated Swimsuit calendars, which some people consider "soft" porn? Could it be that you are intolerant because it consists of only Blondes while you are a Brunette? Could it be that you are intolerant because it involves barnyard animals & you are a member of PETA? We don't know. And lastly, since we don't know what his porn habits are, yet we DO know that you asked "him not to because I feel disrespected", we need to know WHY you feel disrespected. Perhaps your feelings of disrespect come from feelings of inadequacy at oral sex when compared to a porn star's ability to swallow a 24 inch Polish Kielbasa? Perhaps because you feel it objectifies women? Perhaps you feel disrespected because he is looking at porn instead of you? Whatever the reason, you definitely need to determine if his porn viewing habits are excessive (see above) AND why you don't like it.

Well all guys look at porn. If it's where the child can not see it then .
I wouldn't feel disrespected if it is NOT taking away from your love life or he is not pleasuring himself.
Search here for something about girls & porn for even more answers on the topic of how many watch alone, or with their guy or feel like you do.

Merely looking at porn should not be viewed as disrespectful. Really, we'd need to know how you feel disrespected.

If it was so much viewing that it interfered with the relationship and/or household, then it would be a problem.

But just looking at porn should not be viewed as disrespect.

That depends. Perhaps finding out why he is so heavily into porn may help. Talk about it. Do you like porn? If so, check it out together, get some movies together, go to a sex store and shop around, even if you aren't into porn, find something that you might both enjoy. Start finding out what kind he likes and why? Can some of it be incorporated into your sex life?

For many men it is simply a way to escape, to fantasize, or simply excess desire that is not being met between the sheets. If you can have children together and have sex together then you should be able to openly talk about it. If he is apprehensive, proceed slowly, show interest instead of disdain. Even if you don't like porn for yourself, it can act as a catalyst within your sex life.

The dark side to porn is that many become simply addicted and it doesn't matter how much or what kind of sex they are getting, they need their dose of porn. It can be an addiction just as any other, and that should be dealt with differently. For now though perhaps a softer approach could open the door to other things for the both of you.

This is soo disrespectful to you. I can't tell you how bad. You are so right to expect him to not be watching it after you ask him not to. You have very good reason and you are NOT acting like a child. He's acting like a sex maniac. The more of that crap he watches, the more he'll want it. What kind of daddy will his child ever have to look up to?

I wouldn't say it is disrespecting you unless he is purposely doing it to piss you off. Men are very visual creatures and just by looking at porn does not mean he is necessarily disrespecting you. I actually think porn can get very good as long as it is used in a proper manner. For example, there are a number of men and women who have become addicted to porn which means they will need to get their fix and eventually it will have to become more and more hard core in order for them to get off. This can obviously create a problem in the bedroom since you can't be as wild as some of these videos can get.

I also know that women have chemicals in their body that have them watching for betrayal. Looking at porn is not a betrayal, although that might be what your mind is telling you it is.

You might take a different perspective and look at it with him. No it doesn't mean you are a lesbian if you look at pictures of naked women. For me I enjoy looking at scenes that have both a man and a woman in it because it creates a more realistic image for me.

I wouldn't say you are acting like a child, but a product of our society which has also taught many women that if a man is looking at something like that it is disrespectful. I don't think it is in many cases.

As long as he's not doing it in front of the kid, I really don't think you should have too much problem with it. I think women basically have three choices: guys who look at porn openly, guys who look at porn secretly, and guys who are so totally dominated by their woman that they don't look at porn but they also resent their woman for it.

If you feel disrespected, then there is a reason to have a sit down with him. Not to say no you can't watch porn, but maybe not while I'm in the house or the kids are awake.
Another option would be to watch porn with him, maybe if your involved you won't feel as disrespected. You could go and pick out a porn of your liking for the two of you to watch, as a surprise.
Just a few suggestions. Good luck!

you shouldn't feel like a child 'nor insecure about yourself.firstly,if the child is seeing the porn then your husband has a worse problem than sex addiction! he's subjecting your child to porn.that's illegal!

secondly,your child's father has a sex addiction that needs to be dealt with by him seeing a counselor or psychologist or psychiatrist.i can't stand it when someone tells a wife that her husband is normal and that it's normal for the husband to be searching for porn on the net or any other place.it makes me sick! this man needs counseling.period!

this might be 2008,but a sick person is still a sick person in any language.until he gets some kind of help his 'porning' won't end! don't fool yourself and don't listen to others who classify it as being normal or a guy thing /.

it's a nasty addiction!

If he is looking at pornography to the point where you are feeling shut out and disrespected then there is obviously a problem. Would you be ok with him looking at pornography a minimal amount? Is it the fact that he looks at porn that bothers you or the fact that he looks at it so much?

It can be unhealthy for a man to look at porn so much if he is using it as an subconscious excuse to keep an emotional distance from his partner. You need to speak to him about why it bothers you so much and you need to ask him why he feels the need to look at porn SO much. An interest in porn is normal for a man, whether he is single or not, but it can take over and that's when things get worrying.

You're not acting like a child but you need to make sure you your opinion across properly. He may think that you don't like him looking at porn so much because you're jealous but this isn't necessarily the case. Think about what your main issues are with it and tell him; calmly.