OK I lied a little bit but the option in which I really feel isn't there. It doesn't bother me for the most part. But my boyfriend has slept with over 100 girls. Yeah, I know. He used to be a complete man whore. And frankly the reason I started sleeping with him was because I didn't think there was any chance of getting attached, I just wanted a bed buddy at that stage in my life. Plus, he was always getting himself checked out just to make sure, and we always used condoms. But some how we ended up really falling for each other. Now, for the most part I don't care, but it does bother me sometimes when it's like, everyone we run into, he has slept with.
I'm not sure. I wouldn't date him if he had sex with random women before me. Like, a lot of one night stands, would be a turn off. I would be afraid of what he might have.
It shouldn't matter but it does to me. If he had 30 partners then I would start to think well why wasn't he able to keep any of them long? There must be some major personality flaw if he has had tons of girls before me. Or he might just be a player.
Yes, it does bother me. It makes me think how may STDs he may have and if he can ever commit to any real stable relationship with a woman and if he can be faithful to her. Also, its said that when you have sex with your partner then you're also having sex with all the people your partner has had sex with, that is quite disgusting. But then, if it all happened years ago when he was younger, and now he changed his ways and wanted to commit then I would possibly have a whole different aspect on the matter.
It's really strange to think the duality people bound themselves to when judging the sexes! If a woman is a whore if she sleeps with many men, then a man is a whore as well! No difference should be made, and that's the way I see it.
There is a difference in people's minds because of how the sexes think. Regardless of how much some may want to be treated the same, we're not the same. We're very different. Gals tend to be more reserved than guys -- you won't see many guys talking about their virginity as if it's a treasured thing. You won't see too many of them requiring love before having sex.
Because of this, women who don't match the image of the reserved woman are treated like an irregularity - in this case, a whore. - 2 months ago
(Continued) Women cry a lot. If a guy cries a lot, he's looked down upon by pretty much everyone. Women (and men) see it as a sign of weakness, and indeed it is. This is simply an example of how society has standards for both sexes, not just women. When people violate those standards they're labeled. A wimp, a whore, a criminal, an outcast, an extrovert, a hippie, a gun-nut, a terrorist, a hero. Etc.
Labels have always existed in tandem with society. As long as society exists, so will they. - 2 months ago
Answerer
If a man cries to me it means the same thing as it does for a woman. So you're telling me that men and women are judged differently in criminal offenses?? I don't think so. And I still stand by my statement...No matter what some bigoted people might think, society is what you make it, and you seem to be very fond of your 'macho' beliefs.... Which is ok, (with you), but completely judgmental and narrow minded when it comes to all people. - 2 months ago
I don't think you ready my comments very carefully. Oh well. To summarize, society is NOT what we make of it. Our own beliefs, sure, but not society.
I was not speaking of my views. I was speaking of commonly-held beliefs that society clings to. Oh, and crime? The terrorist/criminal thing was just an example of labels that society applies to people -- much like the label 'whore'. It all depends on your view of things. Were Jefferson and Washington terrorists or patriots? Player or whore? ;) - 2 months ago
Answerer
Terrorists and whore is my answer... ;P - 2 months ago
it does bother me, it makes me question his personality/behaviour with his previous girlfriends (e.g. jerk? abusive? clingy? stubborn? player?) and it also makes me wary of potential STD's if he's had many sexual relationships.
I went for "C". Reasons - I would wonder why anyone has been so promiscuous. I know everyone has different ideas of what promiscuity is and for me this is above a reasonable number of people. Even at 10 I wouldn't be SO comfortable. BUT if I liked someone that had had lots of sexual partners then I don't suppose it would really matter all that much as long as he had always been safe and tested.
I have had quite a bit of experience in my life. By no means has the number exceeded 50 but it's fairly big enough. Most of it was done in my experimental younger years. Anyhow, I don't want my boyfriend to judge me on it so I wouldn't judge them. It's not a turn on to have slept with hundreds of women. A turn on to me is a man that meshes with me sexually, physically and most importantly emotionally. I have been with men that have had 1 other partner in their life and have been more sexually expressive and better than men who have had 30 partners. As long as he is clean the number doesn't matter to me.
it bothers me a lot. its nasty if you sleep with a lot of people. I asked my boyfriend that question the other day. he's 30, but I still hated the response I got because it was more than 10.
It matters to me, because If he shares his body with anyone. Then what makes it special when he shares with me? Plus knowing that there're women who know your partner intimately isn't somthin that most women like ( but accept) knowing that there're a lot of women that know him like that, is a big turn off
I chose "E" because I think it's pretty personal. I have never discussed my past sexual relationships with my guy, and he has never discussed that with me either, and to be honest with you, I don't even want to know, and I don't care!
The past is the past, I only focus on our present and future! If he's had sex with a 100 different woman. all I know, for a fact is that I'm his number 1.
I know it doesn't matter to my girlfriends. It kind of bothers me though, if he's had sex with over 7 or 8 girls. I just have a very visual mind and when he tells me about past girlfriends and how often they had sex. How she thought she was pregnant. It kind of freaks me out (and turns me off) because I see images running through my head of him with her. Although I think this is related to the fact that he cheated on me (which is when my mind became very visual). All I could see for weeks was an image of her on top of him, safe to say I haven't been the same since then :( So this could just be me.
I don't think it really matters as long as it was always safe sex everytime. Personally, I don't think knowing your partner has slept with 20 girls as in answer C is a turn on. Kinda man whorish.
I think that it's kind of good to know sometimes whether your partner has been with a lot of people because of std's. Some people lie, so you might not know whether they have std's or not. However, I think that part of accepting your partner for who he/she is requires being honest about your life and who you really are. If you really love and accept the person, you can accept the fact that they may have not been such a great person in the past or they may have slept with more people than you would have cared for. However, if you're looking to settle down with a player, and you know he's slept around a lot - especially if he does not come out and tell you, then I would say that unless he comes clean and is honest with you, you might end up a notch in his belt or bedpost or whatever. Otherwise, if you really love him, and he loves you, you can forgive and forget the past. Just don't repeat it!
Poll added by question asker. Cast your vote to see the current results.
(Age:Under 18)
When: 4 months ago
(Age:30 to 35)
When: 4 months ago