My question deals primarily with an attempt to better understand the girl I love, and perhaps myself, as well. Early on in our relationship, my girlfriend would often tell me of how she gets what she calls "butterflies" whenever we would hold hands, kiss or any such thing. I assumed that by butterflies, she meant the general feeling of happiness and contentment that we felt when around each other. But one day, she asked me very plainly whether I felt these butterflies, too.
It was shortly thereafter that I realized that, aside from happiness and contentment, she was feeling a very physical sensation that I knew I did not share. She described it as being similar to what one feels when going down a steep hill or on a theme park ride, but obviously more sexual in nature and, depending on her level of arousal, more intense. When I told her I felt no such thing, she was genuinely surprised and perplexed. It's apparent that this feeling is an early stage, so to speak, of orgasm. What's confusing to me is that she can feel fairly strong sensations of pleasure when I simply touch her or look at her, and the feeling can last for 60 minutes or more. She says she often gets these butterflies when she just thinks about me.
We are both virgins and committed to abstinence until marriage, so we're not about to experiment in any way. I would just like to know how this works, and if it's normal that I don't feel the tangible pleasure she does. Is it true that women can feel more intense pleasure and for longer just by thinking about it than men can by stimulating themselves physically? Is this nature's way of balancing the burdons of birth, menstruation, and the plethora of other hardships women face?
60 minutes or more sounds long but I have definately felt butterflies and it's one of the best feelings in the world. I'm not sure that it's orgasmic...it seems more emotional and includes excitement, hope and, yeah, a lot of lust. Interesting that you don't feel them...I wonder if guys just don't, by nature. Good question.
I agree wih marisa. Although I do have to say that guys can feel the same way, as I have before.
I would say it is different with different people. Perhaps you might get that feeling with sex, or when you hold your baby for the first time (whenever that may be in the future). Or maybe never.
People feel things in different ways. I wouldn't worry that you don't feel that way, and I wouldn't take it as a sign that you don't have strong feelings for her since you seem to.
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