I only want to do one thing: tell him I love him...but how?

You're trying to do two things at once that you should probably try separately: come out, and date your friend. You should probably deal with it one step at a time, coming out first.

Your gaydar is possibly a little underdeveloped, so that only the freaks stand out. You're likely surrounded by normal gay guys like yourself, you just can't spot them. If there's a gay-friendly part of your town, spend some time there to see how grown gay men act.

Goshhhhhh, well I do know a couple gay guys and both are not into the group thing you mentioned. They're pretty involved in things and to my knowledge, no one suspects that they're gay. If you know the guy is straight then of course the more you're around him the more you'll probably be bothered by wanting more. If he's straight and you get too "close" he'll suspect what's up and that talk could get around. I feel sorry for your situation because it must be so hard for you. Of course you can explore it, but I'd say to be careful how you handle this. It's ok to try to be his friend. Even if it's not gay, if you should happen to become good friends with him, you might end up being able to talk with him about your situation if he happens to be an understanding guy. Eventually, you'll have to come to terms with this but you don't have to come out of the closet if you don't want to, except with guys that are in the same situation as you are.

Weigh the odds. Would you be happier letting your feelings out to him, or protecting your friendship?