So, for a little (like, the last two weeks) bit I've been trying to come to terms with being gay. I'm having a hard time, and I guess I have some questions on things I do and don't feel (and other stuff like dating, etc.).
1.) so, I guess I get crushes on guys (I don't get them on girls. I've tried it on girls I found sexually attractive, but I got nothing). like, I found out we have things in common, and then I begin to like them (even if I'm not sexually attracted, just normal attraction like "hey, so-so is good looking"). And then I even get jelous if they talk to other girls and stuff. so, when I accepted the fact that I'm sexually attracted to girls, I felt something change in me (I don't know if it was the denial of the situation going away or what) so I don't know if I still feel this way. I guess the question I'm asking is if I should ignore/forget this and move on? also, another thing, is that if I'm talking to a guy and I catch their stare, I feel this weird pull/connection thing and I don't know what it is, but also, I still don't know if it's there, should I ignore that too? as for the not gettting crushes on girls, is that possibly still my mind in denial?
2. as for dating girls, um, I'm not sure what to do. becuase, I don't think I want to date girls at all. like, I still don't know if it's the denial, but overall, when I feel safe in my own little world, I don't really want to date girls but only have sex with them. I dunno, I probably won't feel this way later so just any info would help.
3. how to feel better about the whole situation, like what to do if negative things happen, like your friends react badly, or even how to accept myslef more and dislike myself less or something.
wow you sound just like me. see I think your bi. for me I don't see myself in a real relationship with guys but I can see me having sex and stuff with them. my advice is go with that your bi. you should be happy first then if you want to after your happy label your self. if you got anymore questions just message me
Well, I guess I have one question, if you've been in this situation before: like, there's this guy that I like, and I kinda want to date him,but I'm afraid that I won't get turned on by him at all (cause girls turn me on easily,if I fantasize about guys,it takes a long time).but, I'm just afraid that I won't feel anything sexually about him and that if the relationship gets to sex, I don't want to cheat him out of anything. if you haven't been in a situation like this, just your opinion I good. - 10 months ago
Answerer
Hmmm I had the same fear when I was giving girls another chance. I know it might seem hard to get turned on in a fantasy with guys but I think you might find things different if he was there holding you in the arms rubbing and kissing you all over and etc. to be honest the best thing is to give him and chance and if there is problems, sit down with him and explain. but things are different in person with sexual things so I would give it a shot - 10 months ago
you still like guys for sure. If you don't get crushes on girls, and you don't like them as much as guys, why pursue it? Why even consider that your bi if you are fully happy with guys? It sounds like your talking yourself into being lesbian. You don't want to have sex with a girl. Unless, you can honestly say that you find their p**** hot and attractive. You have one yourself, I'm sure sex with a guy is much better for you.
I'm curious to see what you are thinkin, comment back?...
I'm not entirely sure what to think. like, since I was kid,i never felt a craze to chase guys like all my friends and my sister,so I thought I was werid. then in my final years of high school,i noticed that girls were attractive,and I figured that since I had more of a "reaction" that I was gay. I also think that I'm frightened of guys to a degree,and my opinion and mindset changes everyday to the point where I confused myself more.i have also thought I was talking myself into it to, but I dunno - 10 months ago
Answerer
Again, you obviously do like guys. You're not sure if you like girls. A lot of people don't start getting crushes till later (8th or 9th grade). Something about all girls is they can appreciate a hot girl. So you're not off track there. But seriously answer the question - Can you not wait to have your face between a girls legs, eating her out? Or put on a strap-on dildo and do her doggystyle? That's what lesbian sex is. so if you wanna do those things, then I guess you are bi. - 10 months ago
Answerer
One more thing, have you ever had sex or anything with a guy? I'm sure you will like it. I'm curious, if you have never really done anything with a girl or a guy, which would you rather do - eat out a girl, or give a guy head? Also, which would you rather have sex with?
I really think you're straight. the media and stuff tells you that lesbians are hot and everything so you assume you should like it and wanna try it, but deep down you know guys are hot and sexy and more attractive. - 10 months ago
Question Asker
Ive never had sex; I've never even been kissed. and I don't know what I would prefer. my mind and body respond differently from one another, so I'm not really sure. though, I guess if I had to answer: eating otu a girl seems unsanitary to me (and it kinda creeps me out).i'm not sure about giving head to a guy. as for sex: my mind says guys, while my body says girls.im pretty sure that the meida has nothing to do with it. I don't see anything great about what the media says, its just how I feel - 10 months ago
You ahve to do things sexually with a girl/guy to know that's what you like... Trust me. I am sure you would rather have a dick than a fake dildo. think about it. - 9 months ago
1. As a general rule, it's a VERY BAD IDEA to ignore what you feel. Your feelings give you clues to who you are, what you want, and who you need to be with. Want to crush on guys? Go with that. Have sex with girls? Go with that. You be smarter and more sane knowing yourself than fighting yourself.
2. As for not dating girls, but just wanting to have sex with them, it's a normal (THE normal?) problem straight guys face, and it's solvable.
Some tips:
Don't mislead yourself or the girls you meet--it wastes time. She's either game or she isn't.
Learn to watch clothing, attitude, and body language. A girl who's out for quick sex won't be as subtle as usual.
Don't ignore women in relationships; you just might be the best thing thing for her if you're willing to be uncomplicated. (When I've dated bi women, girls like you kept them sane.)
Never date your booty calls; it confuses the relationship and begs for trouble. Note: For the same reason, don't cuddle after sex. Kiss goodbye and get the hell out of there.
Find a straight guy who's good with women and have him school you. Better still, a bi/gay girl who's good with women.
3. You'll feel better once you settle into your own skin. As for friends, dump unsupportive ones; this is a general life rule, best you learn it now.
As for accepting yourself, I don't know what to say, except that you're fine, EXACTLY AS YOU ARE. Yes, you're complicated, but that only means you're interesting. Once this all sorts out--and it WILL sort out--you'll be happy and beautiful.
It really doesn't sound to me like your gay, you just like lesbian sex.
It's acctually more common than most people would admit, men and women both often have fantasies about gay sex but would never get into a relationship with the same sex.
You're not alone, I sometimes get the same idea about other guys but I would never date them, I only date girls.
The best thing about being bi (and ACCEPTING it) is letting your feelings take over. Follow your heart, and not your brain. You're young- try a lot of new things. What feels best for you?
I have no idea. I guess physically, I'm drawn towards girls, but if I find something appealing about guys when we have something in common. I dunno. (ps. what does follow your heart mean exactly?). that, and I don't really want yo go out and start experiment with random people. - 9 months ago
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 11 months ago
When: 11 months ago
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