My boyfriend and I had great, hot sex the first few times we got together. He was assertive, passionate, performed oral without being asked and I thought I had hit the jackpot. But as the months have gone by, he doesn't do oral, barely fingers me, sticks to same positions, not much foreplay, and not much open mouth kissing. He says because at the beginning, he didn't have any feelings for me and could be aggressive like that in bed because he didn't care about me. Now that we are in love, he is more gentle (and boring). If you are in love, wouldn't you want to do more pleasurable stuff (like oral) and share more intimate things in the bedroom?
lame, he's really got to figure out what he's got because he's taking you for granted, that's not a great thing at all, yeah I share a lot of things in the bedroom if I had a gf, but I don't have one so I'm kind of desperate but um yeah he should be putting more into his sensual life and get in the game
He's feeding you BS. I ran into a similar situation years ago with a girl I started dating. When we hooked up she was great in bed, doing all the good stuff. Gave me oral on our first night together (wasn't very good at it, but she tried) and then just died in the bedroom as the months went on. Our sex life became one-sided.
I ended the relationship because of it. She knew what to do in order to start the relationship but wasn't really into it. I honestly felt like I was lied to.
I agree with you, I don't think he was really into me. I think he's been playing me and lying to me the whole time. Says he love me, but his actions in the bedroom don't show it. Our sex life was also one sided, I felt like I had to ask him to do stuff to me and he just didn't do it on his own cause he wanted to please me. So, that's not a turn on at all and he began to make me feel very insecure. I'm glad you think he's BS too and that I'm not just going crazy! - 9 months ago
It sounds like the two of you are in a sexual rut. Maybe he just doesn't feel like putting in the effort anymore and uses the "I didn't care for you then" excuse, which is ridiculous because being aggressive in bed does NOT signify a lack of caring.
I agree with the other posters. Sex should get better when you are in love. You are more intimate and you want to please your partner. There is a time to be gentle and also a time to swing from the chandelier.
Maybe mixing it up, like changing places you have sex or playing games, taking showers together, massages, just about anything that is different. Tell him what you need and want from this relationship.
Um, me and my husband have been together for 3 years and the sex has honestly just gotten better for us! Of course, we constantly go weeks, months, sometimes a year, without seeing each other due to the Army so it's almost like having sex for the first time all over again lol! But yeah, he's totally just pullin it over on yah. We've only wanted to experiment more as time goes on.
Ugh I am totally with you on that one. How weird is that? Boring sex life sucks so bad. I always thought when you're in love, you become more comfortable with each other enough to do whatever, whenever and in any position possible, and want to make them so happy in bed to keep sparks flying and prevent a dull sex life which can lead to cheating, Lord forbid...
have a talk with him -my best advice- tell him how you feel and what you want.
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