Does my ex boyfriend still want to be friends or no?
Alright, so I'm trying to figure out if my ex boyfriend still actually want to be friends or if he was just saying it to be nice.
He broke up with me because he saw me as just a friend but said he really didn't want to come off as a jerk and that he still wanted to be friends. Despite this, he never contacts me or makes any effort to hang out whatsoever. I IM him maybe once a week and he talks for a decent amount but then he always ends the conversation.
When I asked him upfront this is how he responded: "yea of course I still wanna b friends lmao"
Whenever we see each other it's still awkward.. we both avoid each other's eyes. He told my friend that he saw me as a "very good friend and would never want to hurt me" but that could just be him trying to make sure no one saw him as an ass.
What do you think?
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
From my perspective, he is being a sweet guy trying not to be an ass COMBINED with wanting to keep you around incase things change. You two broke up for a reason either way. In this situation, I would continue what you were already doing - improving yourself. If he changes his mind, then the ball is in your court to accept him back.
In the mean time, improving yourself (going to college, working, etc) will make you more desirable to other men. Everyone likes someone with depth.
What Guys Said 3
He wants to be friends.
He just doesn't want to be friends to the same extent as when you where a couple.
Its simple. He will miss you if he doesn't see you, but only after an extended period of time (as is with friends). Its how guys know a girls not right. If you miss her every moment, she right. If you miss her when you haven't seen her for some time (like some days) she's just a great friend.
Alot of guys go out with girls then see them as friends and tries to steer in that direction, Hang in there its just getting over that awkward slump and you'll be fine, just be friendly when around him.
Like anyone cares* I have had 3 Girlfriends the past year, I'm Super best friends with two =D I bicker with one cause its fun and she's knows that so we tend to keep it going , never gets old but we get along when we want to =D
What Girls Said 5
i think he is just being an asshole I have been in this situation before and I would just say forget about him. some of my ex boyfriends were very understanding and I am still best friends with them so I would just say avoid him and maybe one day eventually he will start talking to you again but he will actually want to be friends. I waited 1 year until my one ex boyfriend started talking to me again and we fought like every single day so just avoid him.
sounds just like me.. my ex and I broke up recently too.. but he trying to ease off nicely, I don't kow where we stand but its the same deal, says hi on msn but that's abot it, does not text me or for eg call to hang out this weekend.. basically I would take him as he is or you will get to hung up about it. I mean my ex or whatever he is, if he cared he call mroe make more effort but I am gicing him his time.. and that's the way it goes I guess
improving yourself is the best thing you can too hun, more men will fine you desirable and you can always keep your options open, regarding your ex bf, I think its pretty normal for a guy to break up with a girl becuz he doesn't feel the intimate connections, remember, a guy must really care for a girl in the first place to actually put a stop to a relationship becuz he doesn't feel the connection, if he didn't care, he would've used you. I personally think he's a sweetheart and admitting him back into your life later on, well, you'll just have to look at your options since you're improving yourself, good luck sweetie
I think you have the right instincts when it comes to your ex. I doubt any guy wants to look like an ass during a breakup, especially since girls talk and the word will spread about how a guy dumps a girl. Saying that he wants to still be friends afterwards is just him being polite, unless you were really good friends before you started dating.
If he really wanted to still be friends he would bother to call, text, or try to hang out with you like a friend. Because he is not acting like your friend, means that he wasn't serious about his offer of post break-up friendship.