So I have been dating a guy for 8 months who is from another country. He has been in the US for about a year and a half total. We have exchanged I love you's and spend EVERY night together. He goes home to his country about for work every few months lately. We even have tickets purchased for me to go with him in the summer. Recently he has made me doubt how strong our relationship is. I made the dumb mistake of looking at his facebook. I found several messages between him and girls from back home. One even making fun of me lightly. I used google translate the best I could to understand them but it is mostly him letting them know he will be in town over valentines day. I dont know how to bring it up or if i should wait it out then ask him. I care a lot him and dont want to lose him but I refuse to be made a fool of. He called them beautiful as well. Could they just be friends? Should i dump him and get over it? I wish i could unsee this but I can't now :/
- wait it out!Vote A
- let him go!Vote B
Most Helpful Guy
Kind of as pointed out, these kinds of automatic translators can be very misleading, especially for certain languages.
It is complicated when you have these kinds of relationships which go overseas. He might have a very different dynamic there with his friends, childhood, family. It's like a different world, and I think you'll understand it if there comes a time where you join him in entering that world.
But I think it would take the most incredible jerk to be exchanging "I love yous" all the time and not mean something very strong by it.
One thing though, just in terms of the health of the relationship. It's not always so good when both people become extremely dependent mutually. Those kinds of relationships can end very badly. Mostly the heat and feelings are so intense there that someone can get burned.
It might be healthy for one or both of you to seek some independence. I'm speaking only from narrow experience as someone who got burned twice like this, where we went from texting "I love yous" and "I miss yous" all the time to arguing and bickering about stupid things, a roller-coaster ride of the most intense feelings (both negative and positive). At some point that roller-coaster can get derailed.
There's kind of a balancing act there between saying "I love you" too much and not growing tired of each other. You can almost grow tired of missing each other, as odd as it sounds, or fearful, worried about losing the best thing you have going at the moment, things of this sort. People just tend to act funny when there's so many "I love yous" being thrown around.0
Most Helpful Girl
What country is he from and what did he actually say?0