Should I talk now or later?

My ex and I were in a long distance relationship until it couldn't work anymore because we barely saw each other and our schedules rarely allowed us to really talk. When we broke up, my ex told me that he didn't want to talk to me anymore because it was better if we both moved on... but he also told me - knowing that I'll be back in 4 months - that we might get back together when I'm back. This was 3 months ago though, and not talking to him is really hard. I miss him very much... I also don't know if he changed his mind and might be open to talk now, but doesn't because I didn't reply to his last message.
So my dilemma here is: should I text him and ask how everything is going even though 3 months ago he said we shouldn't talk, or should I wait until I'm back in 4 months to talk to him knowing that I miss him very much and that rebuilding the connection now might make it easier for us to get back together when I'm back?


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  • I was in an exactly same situation as yours and my opinion is keep what things are now until the distance is not there anymore and you two really have a chance to get back together, physically.
    In my case, my ex did come back to me but the core issue between us, the distance, was still there. Then we decided to stay "friends" out of our emotional needs, but what follows was that we had arguments such as he questioned me whether I still have enough care of him or I complained the ambiguous boundaries we had. Then we decided to make it official and the distance problem surfaced again to end things, for good.
    In short, I think getting back together it's totally possible if distance is the only difficulty you're facing, and the best thing to do in order not to kill the chance is to preserve things in the best state- where it's still possible for both of you to pick up things and then go together.
    Just keep your opportunities open, and if you are really meant to be, it will be.
    Hope you'll get the best result you want when you go back. :)

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    • thank you!!! I've been looking for an answer that was clear and made sense since the break up and finally I got one! I will do that then!!

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