Break up trouble and depression?

So I broke up with my boyfriend after two years, fully known him for nearly 5years he was my first boyfriend /love so we had history and we were very close during those two year. We were very much in love done a lot together/ sooo many memories. Yet we had problems / about the past/ paranoia/ some arguments about differences - (money/ finance/ the future/ living together) we did put a bit of pressure on each other by talking long term maybe too much. However those two years we had the best times did so much!! like any couple no one is perfect like little arguments. we broke up after a huge argument his family wasn't happy especially his mum - which I was so disappointed that he got them involved. since then it's been three months and I have never been so down and upset. These three months he has been soooo mean to me out me down in everything in my my work/ my degree / my friends / my upbringing / everything about me. I am devastated I feel used my confidence is so low I'm scared about the future meeting someone new opening up to someone trusting someone. I don't feel good enough or smart enough :(. Even though I have a good job good friends. I just feel so low. Only guy I have ever trusted and opened up to I was so in love with and crazy about since the first day I met him has treated me sooo badly!! :( he never apologised, I keep apologising for my mistakes and saying ther regardless if the bad things I still think his a great guy and I have always though very highly of him cause we had so many good times. But he says nothing to me I feel so small and so used! I'm so stressed I keep contacting him, sometimes he seems like he wants to know what I'm doing but most of the time he treats me like I was nothing!!! everything we used to talk about personal stuff I feel like it meant nothing, how do I deal with this I just want to be okay cause this is effecting everything I'm my life atm I can't focus and I am so unhappy with everything :(

Updates:
Everything that I thought he adored about me and cared about- its nothing now! I feel so low feel like I wasn't good enough. Through our bad times I thought we would work through it like a couple but we loved each other and that's all that matters cause we were faithful and always honest. Just had little arguments :(

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What Guys Said 1

  • First of all, I'd say you need to stop seeing him or being friends - if you never break the cycle, you won't get over it!!

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