Did I dodge a bullet?

We dated 4 months. We had instant chemistry but she broke up with me for having trust issues with her. Here are a list of what has happened to make it hard to trust her...

***She text me a pic of a mans watch saying I left it at her place. It wasn't my watch... Her story? It's the prev. Guy she dated she text him and he actually wanted to come see her to get the watch but she gave it to a mutual friend to give back. Even after she said he was texting her like at midnight asking what she was doing...

*** she washed my clothes one day and said as she gave me my clothes that if I find any men shorts that are not mine they are her gay guy friends said he would come over during lunch at work and swim for 15 mins in the pool them head back to work... Weird right? Especially after that watch incident...

*** we only see each other on weekends and that's her preference she said she likes to have her space urging the week. During the week while at work when I text her she doesn't call me baby of anything she text me like I'm a buddy. And during her lunch I can't get a hold of her. Kinda shady and at night I get to talk to her by phone for about 30 mins.

*** I found condoms in her glove department in her car... She said she picked them up at a gay club a long time ago and also said she was single before me so she wanted to be prepared for sex...

*** her 2 best friends are sluts 1 is married and cheats on her husband and brags about to my ex and the other is sleeping with my exs boss who is married and my ex knows and my ex even goes out to have drinks with her boss...

***. Last time we had sex she was cold for the first time didn't want to cuddle and she started crying... She said the stress at her job is giving her anxiety...

Top of all of this my gut was turning. I hugged her wished her the best and walked away and I never heard from her since 3 weeks ago.

Updates:
I'm also wondering will she call me back? I never contacted her since the break up.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • This was probabaly a good move. It seems very scetchy and like it could have ended badly. It's good you got out when you did.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • you stepped in the same shit I stepped in too !!
    you should've broke up at the first incidence... there is nothing called conditions in relationships that's first, second the moment you hear stories about gay friends or friend's boyfriend or far relative or ugly guy or anything she use to cover the story then that's it she is cheating on you, being cold and crying is the ultimate sirens in a relationship, it can mean two things: she's is not happy with you and she will break up with you in that case or she is cheating on you and the reason she is not breaking up with you is because you give her a space and she can play around while having you, you are like a dream to many sluts as a boyfriend! ... make this as your no 1 rule: if you are sure 99%but you have this little 1% guts feeling then follow it before it becomes harder in future after getting serious !

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    • So it sounds like I had the boyfriend title but she was seeing other guys behind my back... We haven't spoken in 2 weeks and there is an urge in me to confront her but I know I should just move on and run.

    • Show All
    • That is good advice! I couldn't tell with this one she is educated very smart she is a nurse and has a very positive personality good head on her shoulders we clicked so well but she probably clicked well with others... She is also from a small town in TX so she has that southern sweetness on top which made me fall for her. We met through a mutual friend and I have been cheated on before so she makes this approach like she is different and said all my exs were whores and she has never cheated on anyone in her life etc she talked with super confidence so I fell for it... Then the red flags started to show and I realized wait our mutual friend is a slut she sleeps around with even married men and even admits she can't be with just one guy... And my gut feeling got worse every week and my ex knew it. Usually after a hard day at work for her I will give her sex and it helps her with the stress then that last time she started crying and didn't want to cuddle saying she has anxiety?

    • My gut tells me she must of had something going with another guy and sleeping with me brought out the guilt. Maybe I'm overthinking bc. I have not caught her in any lies yet just the red flags her behavior and now this break up. She knew I had trust issues when we first met and she wanted to show me she was different and uses that same reason to break it off after I fall in love that is why I'm mad at her. I verbally told her I don't want to fall in love if she is going to break up with me she reassured me it's ok she is not going to hurt me etc wants to move in together in the future blah blah bullshit. Now with this experience I do not trust nobody!

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • You most definitely dodged a bullet. Ever heard "Birds of a feather stick together"? If her 2 closest friends sleep around, there's a strong chance she will, too, and that's the common interest that unites them. Also- a guy coming over to swim doesn't wear his underwear, and he most certainly does not leave them around. You dodged this bullet better then Neo.

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What Guys Said 5

  • You dodged a lot of stress. Enjoy life and find someone who shares your morals and values.

    She was 100% shady

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    • Thanks man I just been bummed about the break up.

  • Yea I'd say something is going on there. Especially if it's only been 4 months. There is too many red flags to let that go on.

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    • We were official but from what she told me I was her first boyfriend in over 2 years and always had just friends with benefits. She also told me she has had one night stands. Hell I met her through a friend and it turned into a one night stand... That was my first red flag... I have this feeling she was still talking to the owner of the watch because she was liking stuff on his Facebook while she was with me. I also think there must be someone at work also. Just the whole situations seems shady like she is some player. Why make it official with me?

  • yeah, I'd trust your gut instinct on this.

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    • Since she broke it off for her reasons I felt stupid like I screwed but wait a minute the relationship is fresh this is the time u get to know your partner etc. I knew who her gay guy was but coming over during work lunch hour just to swim for 15 minutes just sounds weird to me and the other stuff I'm seeing. I'm wondering if she was screwing someone at work during the week and me on weekends. Who knows but her and her friends are sketchy and kinda shady...

    • yep, well anyway for future reference private investigators can help with this kind of thing. they say that most of the time private investigators find their is an affair happening which means people's intuition is normally correct. you were probably right as well, I'm just sorry it happened.

  • You were right to leave. You dodged a major bullet.

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    • I hope so bc there is a part of me that misses her we got a long so well talked about moving in with each other after a year etc.

  • Yo, you're stupid. She was cheating on you the whole time. I would have bailed at the first sign.

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    • I don't get it why would she make it official with me? It was her idea she wanted to be with me long term.

    • Do you have a relatively well paying job. Were you spending money on her? Chances are she was playing you.

    • Nope I'm poor lol she is a nurse we hooked up from a mutual friend and she was crazy about me. Said she wants us to move in together later etc, told me I was playing her heart strings, told me all these things she loves about me. Then did a 180 turn and broke up with me bc I was not trusting her bc of what I was seeing she said she was offended and has self respect and has lost feelings for me. I just kissed her forward told her I wish her well and I will miss her and walked away... Deleted her off my Facebook and deleted her number... It's her loss and I plan on ignoring if she tries to contact me I'm giving her what she wants and that's the end of us...

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