Should I Let Her Go?

I been married for 9yrs faithfully. Her 32 yr old son been living off us 7yrs in our home. His 5yr old daughter is stay with us to. I raised her since she were born. Herl work part time, lazy, don't spend time with his daughter, don't help out on bills, stay in the room playing vedios , drink to much etc. He won't take advice, & don't want to be a real man, father and get his life together. This got my marriage on the rocks. I talked to her about it many times through out the years & nothing change. I even talked to him & he gets an attitude & lie to his mother that I'm tripping & being mean. His mother & I talk to him & he lie that he will help out, do better but never does. But his mother believe in him & give him a lot of sympathy. Her & I seperated 2 months recently & she cried about getting back together & that he will stay with his dad... Another year has pass & he still here. I tried everything to save & nourish my marriage. Work, cook, clean etc. I want a divorce... enough is enough. I'm so fed up!!! What should I do?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Walk away. Don't let her grown-@ss son steal your happiness. You told her that he needs to grow up, and she clearly would rather enable him to be a immature brat than a man. She made her choice. Now she can live with the consequences, just like her son lives with his. Be happy and find someone who will be happy with you.

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    • Thank you. I am so tire of being took advantage of. I can't win my soon to be ex-wife over her son. I'm out the door.

What Guys Said 2

  • I am going to assume that after 9 years you love your wife? If so, the problem isn't her, its a situation. Situations can be changed. I wouldn't break up with her at all. If you love her, tell her, hey I love you, and want to be with you, and we can do that at my new apartment, because I can't live with your son and granddaughter any longer. Once you rent an apartment or another house, your in that lease legally for 6-12 months. Let your wife deal with her son alone, remove the pressure from yourself and you MAY can do it without ruining your marriage. A lot of people in this country are married, love each other and dont live together. This may solve the problem and he may move out, or you may find that you are okay living apart together. Plenty of research on the subject and becoming more and more common. My thought is if you have a happy marriage and love your wife, find an alternative, the next one could be worse. Easy to fantasize how you will remarry a super model kid free with no issues, but in reality just finding someone you can spend 9 years with is tough... psychology today could-you-live-apart-together... Just google that to look at. Always an alternative to divorce if you really want one.

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  • 32 year old and acting like that and you're dealing with it that's tough, tell his mother to stop think about him in that way bc his 32 years and you did your best to fix him but didn't work tell her she can see him any time but don't involve him in your life bc you all are adults and old to deal with his problems, if nothing work then it's up to you let her go or not but in general I don't advise you to let her go bc you spent 9 years and you're 49 so starting from there maybe a problem or difficult.

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