My boyfriend has broken up with me, but we still live together. I want him back... HELP PLEASE?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years and we live together with 2 crazy dogs (his dogs which I love). He travels a lot for work so I take care of things while he is gone, including the dogs which is a lot of work.
We live in an area which is quite far from my family and friends so it does get quite lonely and I rely on speaking with him everyday to get me through it.
2 months ago, he was showing me a video from Youtube on his phone when a notification popped up which said "Ally from Tinder". I lost me shit (obviously) but when he showed me his profile it said "just looking for friends, in a relationship" and there were pictures of me on there. He did call "Ally from Tinder" pretty" so it was mild flirting but I didn't get how he could be on this dating up just trying to look for friends.
Anyway, the last 2 months I suppose I was seeing if I could forgive him because he did admit he was wrong and has been trying to make it up to me, but unfortunately I have been treating him really badly and bringing it up every time we have a fight. I get really jealous if he is talking to female friends online etc.
He recently broke up with me, after I was thinking of breaking up with him because he just couldn't take it anymore I guess. Problem is we live together, we still love each other and he still wants me to live there with him and get this - still be exclusive. I don't see how we are broken up if everything is still going to be pretty much the same. But he is adamant that we have broken up and is not sure if we will get back together. He says "maybe one day, but not today". I have decided to stay at my sisters for a week to reset and think about things but I'm wondering if the right thing to do would be to keep living with him, be exclusive and pretty much housemates / friends with benefits until he sees that he wants to be my boyfriend again? Maybe if we cut all the fighting and learn to trust again, it could work again? Help!


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What Guys Said 2

  • It's over. He's been thinking about it for awhile. The Ally thing proves he's been considering it. Move out and move on

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    • Yes, I agree that he has thought about it a couple of times when it got really bad. But we always made up. This time is different because he did fight for us after the Ally thing and promised he wouldn't do that again. I just haven't been able to forgive him and kept bringing it up when I got paranoid about things and he said he couldn't do it anymore. Some of my friends say I should take this time with my sister to reset, then keep living with him without all the crap then see how it goes.. I'm thinking about doing this. I think it may be worth a shot. This way I can see if I can try to forgive him and move on without actually really losing him. I dunno...

    • You're just prolonging the inevitable

    • Maybe you're right.

  • it could work again yes but you have to learn to trust or not be so paranoid about things, because lot of relationships get ruined over silly things that might not be so silly to one of the 2 people involved in the relationship.

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    • So you think I should keep living with him after this mini break with my sister? As friends / housemates with benefits and be exclusive with each other? I'm thinking if I can live with him, without fighting and being paranoid, he will probably come around eventually. And it will give me a chance to learn to trust him again as we will be exclusive. He is going away for another 2 weeks in June so that will also give us some space. Do you think that is a good idea?

    • yeah i think it is a good idea it will either drive him to miss you more and he will want you to be with him again or maybe something else but i can't say for sure but if its all about saving the relationship in would do what it takes.

      but you have to eb ready for the bumpy road oif things dont go s planned. but at least you tried so if it does come down you leaving you can be happy know it was worth it putting an effort into it.

    • Hey thanks! :) This way is starting to make more sense to me. If I keep things nice between us but keep doing my own thing as well, we may get back to how we were. I guess the only 2 things that could ruin it during this period is me being all jealous and crazy again, or him actually cheating on me. I have not told him how long I was leaving for, but I was only planning on leaving for 4 or 5 days to stay with my sister from Saturday. I was then going to come back and tell him I have decided to stay and be friends, with benefits, no crap, but I would need it to be still exclusive as he wanted in the first place... then take things from there... It feels like a game, but I think this is necessary.

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