Is it normal to feel sad that my ex has already moved on?

A few short weeks ago I made the tough decision of breaking up with my boyfriend of over a year. Long story short we grew apart, and with me going to college in the Fall I felt that it was for the best. Recently a girl that had been chasing my boyfriend before and during the time that we were dating described to me in great detail their newly professed love...

Is it wrong for me to feel absolutely terrible right now? I know I'm the one who ended things, but that didn't make the news any less painful. Is it normal for me to feel jealous and upset that he's moving on so quickly?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • That's normal for you to feel jealous and upset, and like your relationship is devalued because he moved on quickly. However, with that said, would you not agree it's probably best practice after ending a relationship for him to move on to a girl that might be a good match since things? And for you as well.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's totally normal. I divorced my husband and it was finalized 4 months ago. The divorce was my idea and although I do not want him back, he has moved on and I have to admit it kinda hurts and maybe I'm jealous a little cause I don't have solemn else but he does. Just being honest!

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 14

  • sounds normal. You lost a guy, and someone else now "Feels" happy (double whammy). It sounds to me like you didn't fully disconnect or put it into perspective. You left because of logistical issues (it sounds) not because you don't care about him... the bonds are still there in your "heart"/mind. So, will take time to separate those and be happy for them. Not easy, girls bond more than guys and it hurts. Counseling can help if you can afford it. Or talk it up, pray it up, go to a divorce group, read a book on getting over X, etc.. Don't rush out and find someone else until you process your feelings.

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  • It is normal, but you should not dwell on it... after all it was your choice. I believe you likely made a good mature choice too!

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  • I think its normal to feel bad for a short while, it's only been a few weeks and so you are still not over it completely. It will take time but I think you will get over this.

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  • Its normal. its not normal to act on those feelings though. But she shouldn't have rubbed it into your face...

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  • It's normal to feel those things since you probably have some left over feelings, but at the same time he's no longer your boyfriend so what he does shouldn't matter.

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  • Thats completely normal. Bitch be steppin tho lol

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  • I just cut off exes completely for this reason. They want us to move on and when we do, they bitch about it. XD

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  • Men do not have the support networks women do. This means we have to develop a hard heart & move on , we cannot afford to mope & pine for something that is clearly over !! I've always found this easy to do , as have a " detatched " personality type.

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  • what do you want your boyfriend to do? stay sad about you? come on, you can't really be like that can you? so you finish the relationship with your boyfriend and YOU dont want him to move on? that makes no sense to me.

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  • yup. completely normal. have a nice day!

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  • It sucks but moving on IS the best course of action, in my opinion.

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  • I feel like that is natural for all women, and I think that's how it should be

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  • Yep, very normal.

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  • Guys move on with actions first then let emotions catch up, where women seem to more often deal with emotions before taking new actions.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Totally normal. Just because you ended it for whatever reason, doesn't mean all your feelings just go away. Allow yourself to feel angry or jealous or sad, because it does make us sad that someone couldn't be what we wanted, and then they try with someone else.

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  • He's moving on in his own way, but I feel like that would bite him in the butt if he treasured the relationship. Guys have a way of trying to distract themselves by avoiding their feelings and emotions, but have no real way of confronting those feelings until they crack one day. Women, on the other hand, have a lot of opportunities and emotional outlets with family and friends to properly grieve.

    But I can't speak on his behalf on how he felt. However, just worry about you. It's normal to be jealous and hurt, but it's now time to grieve. When you're ready to meet someone new, you will be emotionally ready for it instead of rushing into another relationship to fill that hole. May I ask if your ex had expressed any interest in the girl? How did he take the breakup?

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    • Before we broke up he had said she seemed needy and boring. She can't hold a conversation for more than two minutes. That's why it bugged me so much when I heard about the two of them dating, because he said he'd never go for her. When we broke up he said he understood and agreed it was the right thing to do because of all the things that were happening and would happen in the next few months. I thought it was an unusually easy breakup...

    • Yeah, then he's probably looking for something short term and something that could distract him now. Since it sounds like this girl had it in for him, he figured that he wouldn't have to work so far to find someone new if this chick was already needy for him.

  • It's completely normal. It makes you feel as if he moved on too quickly, and that he didn't tkae the proper greiving time. it makes sense, so dont worry about it.

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  • Yeah but that what they do.

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  • It's normal to feel sad and jealous. Of course it happens. But it's happened there isn't much you can do now

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  • Yes it's normal to feel jealous, and/or upset. He is just trying to move on that's all. But I can understand if you still may have some left over feelings for him, that's okay. He's just moving on the best way that he can that's all.

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  • I think you were still really sad about ending things, and her telling you about dating your ex so soon hurt you more. I guess it'd probably be normal to feel sad

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  • I felt the same way about my ex moving on so quickly, I think it's fairly normal

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  • Yes, it is. However, he's doing nothing wrong. He's just... moving on... in the best way guys know how.

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  • It's completely normal and understandable

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