So me and my wife are both 24 and when she suddenly became vegan i tried to support her but i dont want my son growing up around her especially with her ignorant ass spewing hate speech nonstop to meat eaters. When she went vegetarian i joined her because i loved her i gave up meat but now im Done Sick and tired of her dictating our fucking life style i had a cheat day and had a 4 piece chicken nugget meal from McDonald's and this bitch throw my fuckin xbox out Now we have been to gather about 5 years my son is my ex's child but she raised him like he was her son and acts like she gave birth to him i respect that but im done with her dictating my fuckin like i want my son to be able to choose whether he likes meat or not. sick of it. I got the damn papers to divorce her now she locked her self in her room calling her friends and mother and now they are bugging me telling me im and asshole and how i'm the one who ruined the fuckin marriage.
Most Helpful Girl
Maybe I could offer some insight to the situation since I am a vegan dating a meat eater (we've been together three years now). We almost broke up last year because of it, but we realized we loved each other too much not to give the relationship a second chance. To me, this sounds like a lack of empathy and communication on both parts. You are refusing to see things from her perspective and not making much of an effort, considering that being supportive does not just involve you giving something up for her, it means educating yourself as she has and having an open mind as well. Instead of trying to change for her, try to see things from her point of view and try to imagine how she feels. And for your wife... She doesn't seem to understand that acting psychotic isn't going to help and that people don't respond to negativity, bouts of rage, and criticism very well. If you really want this relationship to work out, you have to sit down with each other and actually put effort into this. You need to open your mind and take in the information and she needs to chill, read up on the psychology of carnism, cognitive dissonance, and effective activism. I'll link some resources that will help both of you understand each other better and that really helped my boyfriend and I become closer. He may not be vegan, but he understands why I get sad when I see the body parts of animals and he understands why I get angry at the fact that no one seems to care. That's the most I could ask for, honestly. If he goes vegan one day, that's great, but I'll always be so grateful for his understanding and acceptance. Veganism (+this whole situation) is really quite complex, so it may take some time to get through the links I've recommended to you both, but it's worth it if you two are serious about making your marriage work. Believe me, I felt like it was helpless and I wanted to give up on us, but I'm so unbelievably happy that we gave it another shot because our relationship is better and more fulfilling than it ever has been.
I'll add some useful links in the comments of this comment lol. Feel free to use it if you two decide to patch things up.0
Most Helpful Guy
One simple rule in life is that you are free to live it anyway you choose, within the law, and within reason.
What one must not do is force one's values on others, do not force your opinion on others, and do not silence those who's opinions differ from yours.
Read that to her, and if she doesn't get it, she will never get it.
Although a vegan diet pretty much sucks and you are depriving yourself a life of being awesome, some might say it's a petty argument. But it is not the veganism that is the problem here. It is that she is forcing her lifestyle on others. I suspect it does not actually stop at the vegan issue.
Advice? Let her say what she wants to her friends and mother. They are not your friends or your mother. Your own mother will listen to your reasoning. Your wife's mother will never take your side, so just ignore them.
The one who tries to dictate the lives of others is the one who ruined the marriage.1