Is it ok to tell an ex you miss them so you can move on?

I just want to say "I miss you and hope things are ok with you. No hard feelings. I just wanted to tell you. It's not because I expect anything & I'm trying to move on. I just care about you & wanted to let you know so I can get it off my chest. I genuinely hope you've been good x"

We went out for 9 months, and it ended because I wasn't happy in the end and he needed to sort his life out & couldn't cope with things. Money problems, lack of motivation. He didn't want to see me hurt, so we never officially broke up face to face. He even cried once when he thought I was crying.

He's self destructive. not paying phone bill. Not saving any money. He's 32 & I know it's important for him to get things together, but at the same time I don't want to think about him like that.

Should I tell him this?

I feel I can't fully move on yet & think about him & the fact he has no family around or many good close friends. He said i was the closest person to him, but in other ways he was closed off & wouldn't face his issues. We haven't spoken since the but & he's never online. He says i hurts every time he thinks about it & I mean the world to him.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Telling him that won't help you move on, even the message says you haven't moved on, it also won't help him move on either. what you should do is just keep your distance, probably meet new people.

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    • He just messaged me today "Hope you're well" with a thumbs up and smiley face. I've wanted to talk to him for so long, but now I'm confused about what he wants. I haven't replied yet. It's been 2 months since we spoke.

    • there's always the option of keeping it friendly. but after a while of no contact.

    • He actually messaged me a couple of days ago to saying "Hope you're well :)", so I'm glad I didn't say anything.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Telling him you're "missing" him is going to make him think you haven't moved on.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Yeah I guess that is okay. It is strange why people who break up with the person need to do these things, you broke up with him. I am just saying this because the last guy I was seeing said his ex might want to talk to him when she got home from school. I always wondered why since she broke up with him. But, I also understand you had feelings for him at one time and maybe feel bad about it? I am saying all of this because it might give you closure but it might open up old wounds for him. But he also might be happy to know you did still care that much and his grief after the break up was not for nothing.

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  • No there's really no point.

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