I been dating this guy for 6 months now. We are both interested in a serious long term relationship. We both have children from previous relationships. With work, kids schedules, sports, we rarely have any time to spend together. I guess at this point I'm worried how we could ever make this work. Another factor is I was divorced last year and my oldest daughter isn't ready to meet or have him as a part of her life. Any advice? Thanks!
Should I continue this relationship?
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What Girls Said 3
You can date and spend time together and get to know each other while still keeping your private separate lives by meeting on the weekends. There is no need to rush anything since you both are interested in one another and making something serious.
You've recently gotten out of a marriage that regardless of how horrific it was to you (or not), your children did not feel that and need time to accept it and invite someone new into their life.
So I'd say take it slow and there is no need for your children to meet him as yet... Some things take time and this is one of them... Often times they say end of a marriage is like death, and some people need way longer to process it.. One year is not that long.. Give it another 6 months and then see if you want to introduce this man to your family and kids and vice versa.
You dont want to have people meeting each other only to find out things later on that you dislike. 6 months is not that much. Give it 6 months more and then decide.. For now, keep it private and to yourself and maybe few good friends... Your children can find out about it when it is more serious... Slowly introduce them to him and show his good sides and tell them how his qualities positively impact you, your life and theirs. Hopefully you have some nice understanding children.. but just throw positive comments every now and then - randomly... warm them up to the thought and feeling ;)
dont go throwing bombs at them.1
It appears here, dear, that although you Both have 'Work, kids, schedules, sports..'there Must have been some Time along the Love Line To... Find the Time to have gotten This Far Thus Far.
Sit down with him and have a Serious Convo on how to Compromise, to Get on the same page here, dear. If you both Maturely put your Heads together, then with a little Team Work on both Sides, this can Work.
It take Two special people to try to pull this off and all. I see a Chemistry that you Together as Team Mates may have to be the Ones for this Tedious job to get to the... Finnish Line.
Your 'Oldest daughter' is Not the Bread Winner in this family, so with some of your own Patience, tell her She is going to have to Give a Little of her own Somehow... Your Fine Fellow is Not going anywhere right Now.
Good luck and Great Mate Going. xx
Six months is a little early to fully decide on marriage; that is something I'd start considering more seriously after a year or so.
Question: are you two willing to adapt your life styles so that you can actually have intimacy? (Not just sex, but quality time.) Is one of you willing to change shifts/jobs? If you can't take care of your relationship in the long run, then it will be harder on your kids later during the second divorce. Just my thoughts.
I can understand why your daughter needs more time... are you in a rush? Can marriage be put on the back burner for a while longer?0
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