Will the "no contact" rule bring her back?

Okay so I got some advice on here about the no contact rule to use to get my ex back now will someone tell me how this will work because I have looked up articles on this and some say it will work others say it won't. Can I get someones thoughts who tried this and it worked for them and if so how and what happened?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I know you asked for those with experience. But suggest is to not listen to that. It is NOT a good idea. An ex is an EX for a reason. Stop reading stupid articles. Their just teaching you to continue to play mind games with your ex, and then where you ex may take you back, they will grow to despise you for it. Its best to just be honest and owe up where you went wrong. Both parties are equally responsible for a broken relationship. It's not all on you or on her. The blame game needs to stop if there's any. Who the heck came up with this 'NO CONTACT RULE' Crap? You don't contact them because both people needs space to figure out if their ready to move on or not. Period. That is the whole point of not contacting anybody. That kind of advice is very hurtful to those who are serious about relationships. It's stuff like that that gets everybody twisted and confused. Don't play the game. If she wants to try again after a while, she will come to you, not the other way around. What matters is that you both learn to respect one another and show 'sportsmanship'. Meaning that there shouldn't be any hard feelings on anybody. If there still is, it means to back out.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I've lots of experience with this over the years. First, and ex is an ex for a reason. For me, getting back with an ex has always been disastrous. We tend to remember the good times, and get hit in the face later with the bad stuff later like it was conveniently ignored. Best to move on. But, if you feel so compelled, know that nothing is guaranteed. No Contact will send her the message that you do not want to talk to her, which isn't true. It really is best to not use it, and tell her how you feel, so she can respond.

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What Girls Said 14

  • No. When will you guys learn that women hate being ignored, and it doesn't compel us to change our ways, it just pisses us off.

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  • By no contact for you I mean don't keep chasing around after her, let her come to you. As I'm you give her space so she wants you to message her and notices you are gone. Imagine someone hasn't spoken to you for a while, you suddenly miss them right? If someone has no interest it's probably cos she knows she can have you so if you start being busier she will start wondering why you aren't chasing. No contact is only a game if you start ignoring her and stuff, all u need to do is let her come to you abit more because when you take longer to reply it will annoy her. That is a good thing though, because just like when u don't get a reply etc she will feel the same.
    I don't mean in your case ignore her for 30 days. I think with no contact everyone needs to make the rule to their situation as no one is the same.

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  • Dude just move on -.-

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  • It can work but sometimes it doesn't. I've had no contact before with exes and most of them (some were weeks or months) would message me on facebook, text or even show up at my door begging for me to take them back. For some people after some time they really start to miss the other, they miss seeing the other, talking, sex, things start reminding them of the ex etc.. So they try to get the person back.

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    • I just want to win back the woman I love that is all and each time I read something on this NCR some say it will work other times it won't

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    • No problem. Good luck.

    • I need all the luck in the world thank you again!

  • wait... first of all... why you wanna get back with your ex? also that no contact thing might or might not work

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  • I've broken contact and got them to comeback unintentionally. Ultimately it was my decision not to see or contact them anymore in the end. It might work, it might not. Good luck.

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  • The person is your ex for a reason, the 'no contact' rule is a game, and if you want that person back you should just talk to them about it not start any games. I've seen many people try to get back with someone by ignoring them and it just doesn't seem to work in the long scheme of things, it might work momentarily because the person will realize they miss you, but won't know whether it is you as a person, or the comfort you provide.

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  • Everyone is different. Personally NC does not work with me. I hate being ignored. Especially if i. try to work things out and he ignores me. No chance in hell in taking him back no matter how much I love him. if I was easy to ignore then I'm not important to you. NC does nit work with most girls.

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  • It depends.. If the girl loves you it will work, but if she dgaf then it will not.

    I did that to my 1st ex, it worked

    Then to the guy that i last dated, this one it didn't because he didn't have any feelings for me

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  • This trick is not no contact at all, it's EXTREMELY little contact. Not so much that she thinks you still care about her too much, but enough to make her crazy. Instead of ignoring her, treat her like an ordinary sort of friend. Minimal contact, though. Don't start a conversation, but when ou both are in a group together and you have just joined, say Hi like you did to everyone else. Ask her to pass the salt. Pretend that your breakup hasn't affected you as much as it affected her.. Believe me, m friend tried this and it worked. But he and his girlfriend were meant to be together tho

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  • Ok, before I give any advice, what were the circumstances surrounding your breakup?

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    • Long story short I emotionally abused her and we recently just started talking again

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    • Is there any way I can get her back though by doing this or no?

    • Nope. Just being honest. It won't really work, since you're the one that fucked up. It's obvious you want the relationship, yet your ego/confidence/whatever is holding you back from just telling her outright, so you want her to crawl back to you.

      Not a good thing man

  • Sometimes it can, and sometimes it can't. I've done the no contact rule with my exes before and some of them have came back. But my intention wasn't for them to come back I was trying to move on. Some of them would try to get my attention in school, try to follow me wherever I'm going, etc. It takes time for the no contact rule to work, I didn't except it to work but it did. If you just keep yourself busy, and act like you are okay without them they will come back and start to miss you. When they see how well you are doing without them and how well you are adjusting to it, they'll come back. They come back when they haven't had much luck meeting another person.

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  • It depends on her, every girl is different.

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  • The NC rule is used to cut ties with someone to improve yourself. To protect yourself. Not for games like these. Also, by going NC you are blocking them from ever having contact with you again, so how would you actually know if she decided to reach out?
    I personally would not chase anyone who decided to ignore me or block me from their life. It doesn't show love at all.
    You're best bet is to be honest with how you feel towards her and if she doesn't feel the same, then walk away and accept that things won't be the way you want. In that time, you can spend it healing and focusing on you and moving on. Instead of playing some silly waiting game, hoping she comes back in to your life.

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What Guys Said 7

  • No contact is used to protect yourself... not to try and win someone back.

    If you want to get your ex back you have to improve your value to her to the point where she will date you again, not ignoring her.

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    • And how can I do that? She has stated she does not have any feelings for me anymore.

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    • Depends how you two broke up, if you did something bad to her emotionally, you need to prove to her that you are a good person. Do some volunteer work and help the homeless or animals or smth and let her know that you're changing , but not just to get her back you have to mean it.

    • I do mean every word thank you so much!

  • No it will not. The No Contact Rule is horseshit - especially for guys. Ignore it and stay engaged in communicating with her.

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    • But that will continue to push her away though am I correct?

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    • Make it happen and get her back. I blew it but almost succeeded but God saw fit to fuck me over and so, here I am, an empty shell of a man for 23 years.

  • I think you leave it for a while and then if you feel the same way for a while, you return a call when the dust has settled and the drama that tore you a part is less important. Sometimes it's better if emotions aren't running high.

    But I normally cut my heart out and let them have the broken off peace. I don;t know if that;s better or worse but I feel stronger afterwards.

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  • What you have to do is, every 72 hours call your ex back and when she says "Hello?" shout "FUCK YOU" and then hang up. After about 7 months of this she'll be creaming for you.

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  • Think logical: How is going the no-contact going to work if there is no contact?
    And why would you want her back?
    That's no different than drinking from an empty glass!

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  • If she still loves u she will come back with following all rules out there or maybe effortlessly.
    and if not, she wouldn't.
    Even if u walked holding a puppy in front of her.

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  • Just move on already. Your broke up for a reason

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