My boyfriend told me a girl grinded on him and he did nothing about it, is that considered cheating?

So my boyfriend was on a trip and this particular event hosted a dance on the last day so he said he was gonna go and I'm like "okay cool". Well he starts to tell me how some girl comes up to him unbuttons his shirt and sticks $20 in his shirt and starts grinding on him, but what gets me is that he didn't stop her or anything instead he puts his hands on her and starts dancing along. Is this considered cheating? Or am I overreacting because it feels awful


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If he didn't stick his dick in no not really. Everyone dances really slutty at clubs now so I don't think I would want to date a girl who is into getting drunk and going to clubs all the time haha.
    It's scummy to just sit there and dry hump some girl when you're in a relationship, but maybe thats acceptable these days idfk.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd say so, yes. If he's too weak to tell her off, he doesn't deserve you. Instead, he should be assertive with girls like that. She probably had no idea that he had a girlfriend, so it's not her fault. It's his fault for not doing anything about it. I was in a relationship with a guy who constantly had girls flirting with him, and in particular a girl who wanted to get in between us, but he never told her off, basically leading her on and making her think that what she was doing was okay, and I felt so hurt. I wish I'd broken it off earlier, but he was my closest friend and I didn't want to let him go at the time.
    You should let him know how it made you feel and see his reaction. If he gets defensive, it's probably not worth it to stay with him.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • No its not cheating. BUT, if it bothers you then let him know that you don't want no ratchet ass girls grinding on him. lol but seriously. communication is key in relationships or your both going to end up on different grounds and eventually break up.

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  • I wouldn't consider it cheating but he could have displayed a bit of self-discipline and told her he's taken... but, there was no kissing, no groping, no sex...

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    • Just a thought... something should be said for the act that he actually told you about this...

  • Yes.

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  • Time to find a new boyfriend
    I think he's giving you a signal that he wants to break up :P

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  • If he literally told you that with no regret whatsoever I don't think he considers it cheating.

    Think about that.

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  • Probably didn't know how to handle it. Something similar happened to me on the subway during rush when some teenage girl with her friends watching put her butt up against my crotch and started rubbing up against my penis, when it was over they all laughed about it and pointed at the obvious stain on trousers. I had to go home and change and was late for work.

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    • oh dear, not sure if troll or...

    • @paige678 my point is I didn't cheat and was molested and humilated by a group of teenagers.

  • man ya got some low bars my girl cheated on me with hundreds of guys oh wait that was in the beginning so I dont care

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  • i thought guys and girls were allowed to be "just friends", am i wrong?

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    • how is that just being friends?

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    • from what he has told me it doesn't sound like she wanted to be just friends

    • proving that guys and girls can't be "just friends", right?

What Girls Said 8

  • Anything which affects you emotionally or has a negative affect on you is not considered as overreacting. Regardless of how anyone else feels or views it , you should not accept anything which hurts you or affects you in an emotional way.

    You need to set boundaries within a relationship. If not, then people wil treat you as they want. They'll make you live within their own boundaries and standards.

    People treat you how you allow them to treat you. This would be a deal breaker for me, so I'd end the relationship. I'd consider it crossing a relationship boundary. I'd never lower my standards and accept any kind of behaviour which disrespects me

    That's why it's important to know each others boundaries early on in a relationship

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  • It feels awful as it's disrespectful but not cheating

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  • I would say yes it is.

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  • Wow, I would consider breakin up tbh

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  • To me yes, because he did nothing to stop her.

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  • It's a really shitty thing to do

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  • If what he says is actually true, I don't think he's cheating, but he's clearly disrespecting you by dancing along. That's not a good sign, and a major red flag.

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  • I would be upset too! I definitely think it was wrong of him to not stop her, and to go along with it.

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