Anyone ever been through a long term break up.. I need to know if what I'm feeling is normal?

We have been together 6 years.. We got engaged 2 years ago. For the last 2 years I haven't wanted to be in this relationship but I could never bring myself to end if because I was afraid to hurt him. We both drifted apart and even the sex life went down hill. He came home yesterday and said he wanted to break up with me and it hurts. I'm scared because I don't know if my actions or wants have been a mistake this past while.. I'm scared of being out on my own, I'm scared to not have him in my life anymore and I'm just scared and hurt yet part of my feels almost relieved at the same time. We have agreed to still live together till our 2 month notice is up.. We are being civil and nice which is beautiful and getting along but yet here I am.. Unsure of what I'm feeling right now about all of this.. Is this normal even when you didn't want the relationship anymore? I don't know what to think or how to feel.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Just gotta remember that you have not been happy for a long time and at the end of the day your happiness is all that matters. Everyone has those fears after a breakup. Gotta take it day by day.

    • I feel sad it's like a friend dying if that's a good way to put it

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    • I know. It's hard though, so many what ifs I'm just scared and hurting and I don't know why I'm hurting when I didn't want this anymore

    • We all get that way. You can't answer the what ifs. Best to set that aside for right now and try to get over him as vest as you can.

What Girls Said 2

  • You need to get away from him so you can have the space and time to think without having him around. You've been in a long term relationship, and I believe that the fear of letting go off of him is normal. It's someone you love. You two need time to think about what do you really want, either way don't hold him back while you decide if you want or don't want him in your life.

    • I don't want to hold him back. I've been so unhappy and I know he deserves someone who loves him. He has been good to me in a lot of ways but also not so great and I know we are both to blame for this but it still hurts

    • I know babe, it hurts to the point where it's easier to stay even unhappy than leave. But you're so young to be living like that. Let him go now, it won't hurt forever. You will find your happiness and he will find his. It hurts but that's the right thing to do

  • It's very hard to let go of something that used to bring you joy.. Just remind yourself that the relationship no longer does that 😕

    • It's so hard though he was my best friend

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    • I can understand though for this case. He wanted to marry me

    • friends with benefits is a terrible idea with an ex. I agree don't stay friends with exes.