When he needs space because you've spent too much time together?

We've been spending a lot of time together and he said he's been exhausted, one day we were fine and the literal next day he was cold and threatened breaking up. For no reason, it came out of the blue. He said he didn't want to commit yet we've been together for two years. I think it's because he needs space because he's used this excuse before when he needed some time alone but he didn't just flat out say it. We broke up last year for a month then got back together because he said he missed us being together. I'm just confused. Any advice please?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • you guys need waaaaaay better communication.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I've been in the same situation before ! He's putting you on a roller coaster of emotions. This is very unfair for you and you have to voice it out.
    In every relationship "personal space" is essential; you can't appreciate a friend without their absence.
    Talking it out slowly and having a heart to heart conversation will definitely improve the situation, or least make things clearer. Perhaps he has other issues (that you're not aware of), which makes him stressed out, and he suddenly burts. This is why communication is always key.
    But if communication between you two is weak and still fails, maybe its time he feels what its like to really lose you.

    All the best and good luck! <3

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    • I thought we had broke up but he hasn't changed his picture of us on social media and hasn't changed our relationship status... so maybe this is a break?

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    • How long do you think that space should be?

    • i would give it at least a week, you holding up alright?

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well how much time are you spending together? I personally am an introvert and definitely need time apart from a woman I am dating, I need to be by myself. Perhaps he is the same way and just doesn't know how to communicate it until he is about to snap. give some space maybe a day or two apart a week, ask him if he needs his time to himself, if he is an introvert then this is likely the reason for his responses.

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    • We went from being on vacation to me spending the night to Christmas together to going to disney. The day after that he got cold. A solid month of seeing each other every day.

    • Yeah that would do it. tell him you understand that he needs space away and then give him that space, its important to be apart as much as it is to be together because you have to allow each other to have your own lives so that when you come back together you have something to share.

  • did he come back? we talked in a previous question

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    • No we haven't seen or talked to each other

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    • Yes and he's been distant and cold so I stopped

    • i understand... i am sorry for this situation, thought maybe would come around or say sorry, you must devastated for this and i can only hope maybe things will turn in the future and you will br happy

What Girls Said 2

  • The guy may be bipolar, depressed or just moody. Men go through that also. I would pressure a guy like that. Because the more you nag and press them the more he will want space and becoming distant. All you do is help him along the way. And im sure it must be annoying for you because you want is attention and time. But if he switching up back and forth like that, he is showing signs of bipolar.

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  • It's really hard to say. I'm in a similar situation where my boyfriend got stressed out and then there was a build up that led into a "break". It happened over a month ago, and I thought if I gave him space he would come around (he didn't). Now I realize I should have tried to reach out to him, but I fear I waited too long. My best advice is try to get your head clear and do what your gut says. You never know until you try. Good luck.

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