So I just seen my ex on tinder? What to do? Really tempted to swipe right?

[StarGirl2517]

Me and my ex were together for a month. We got together at the start of December. We met each other's families. He said he loved me etc. Talked about the future, marriage and all that. We got on so so well!! He said he was so happy!! Then a week after new year he said we moved too fast and it put him off and he's moving back to Liverpool where he lived for 7 years. I was gutted. Asked him for another chance at moving things slow. He said he wants to be alone for a while and it's best to cut all ties for now. I collected my things from his house (his mum gave me them because he had a tummy bug apparently) and sent him a message wishing him all the best and I'll maybe catch up with him sometime. No reply. Haven't heard from him in a week. Then I looked on tinder today (for an ego boost mostly) and there he is. I'm so tempted to swipe right outta curiousity lol! My sister said he could be on it for a ego boost too but I don't know. Bit gutted! When we started dating he said he deleted the app and I told him I had deleted my account completely. So maybe that's why he's showing?
please help? I'm trying to move on but seeing that hurt!

[BBMonarch]

Swipe left (left is no? swipe NO anyway). You don't need that after ONE month of being together no matter what he said and did that month. Swipe left and then go on and find something to boost your ego if you need that, but just DONT swipe right on an ex.

[StarGirl2517]

I just clicked out of it and done nothing at all! Maybe he just never deleted his account. He's planning on moving overseas and the reason he broke up with me was because of that so I don't see the point in him taking up with someone else. Was just a bit gutting to see.

[BBMonarch]

Of course it is gutting to see.. Its like stalking your ex Facebook page and see him change his status to 'in a relationship'.. but liking his picture or swiping right right or whatever won't make you feel better, if anything you will feel worse if he DOESN'T show up because he swiped no on you.. so, you should try to let it go.. (damn scousers, huh? :p)

[StarGirl2517]

Tell me about it! I don't see why he would be looking when he's planning on moving away again. Would be pointless. If he swipes right too it would probably be a little awkward all round really!!

[BBMonarch]

Sadly he could be just looking for one for the night, but either way.. He is gone and you shouldn't watch his ass walk away, you should just turn your back and find someone new. It was just one month after all.. You'll be fine, just don't swipe right :p

[StarGirl2517]

I just clicked out of it and didn't do anything! I'm going no contact for a while to help me. The longer I'm not speaking to him, the easier it will be for me. If he ever comes back, I'll deal with that when it comes

[Djsem]

So you both went back to your old ways.

Nothing to do but find someone else if you wanna do that.

But if you want some kicks, swipe away.

[StarGirl2517]

I just done it for an ego boost really. I have no intention of meeting anyone just yet.

[Djsem]

Don't deny the possibility out there.

[StarGirl2517]

I'm not but I'm still hurting from him breaking up with me

[Djsem]

Going on tinder won't boost your ego, you're there to find a replacement.

[StarGirl2517]

That's probably true but at the minute no one has come close

[Anonymous]

Well obviously he's not trying to be alone if he's looking on Tinder unless he is on there out of curiosity too

[StarGirl2517]

I am genuinely not looking for anyone else. Just outta curiosity more than anything. And a bit of an ego boost.

[Opinion Owner]

I guess it's possible that he is doing the same but what if he sees you there and swipes right 😊

[StarGirl2517]

My sister said the same but I'm too scared to swipe right lol 😊

[StarGirl2517]

If he's already swiped right and I do then it's a match. Then what?

[Opinion Owner]

I guess you'll both look surprised but he should feel kind of dumb since he broke it off with you, it's not bad that you're on there though

[StarGirl2517]

I just kinda wanted to take my mind off of things and was pretty surprised to see him there. I'm doing no contact on him at the minute so swiping right would be contact lol

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah I guess that's true but wouldn't you be surprised if he finds your profile and swipes right 😊

[StarGirl2517]

I really would!! Is it possibly that he maybe just never deleted his actual account just the app?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah that's possible because if you delete the app it only comes off your phone

[StarGirl2517]

That's what I thought too! But would his location still show?

[Opinion Owner]

Only where he last was I think, oh and does Tinder show people that are in other countries too if you change the distance? I would think it has a limit in miles right?

[StarGirl2517]

I think it does! You can match with people in other countries too. I don't know whether his location is showing when he last used it or not

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah that's hard to know but I suppose if the location changes then he is using It

[StarGirl2517]

I never thought of that right enough! It's stayed the same

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah there are a lot of apps that work like that always using your location for best results I assume. I was going to try Tinder but I couldn't download it without using Facebook which I do not have or use

[Ribhu]

I don't know maybe it would look desperate n that might make him take u for granted

[StarGirl2517]

I just clicked outta the app and didn't do anything. I'm just curious as to what he's done

[Ribhu]

i can't tell u for sure
but after committing to someone i wouldn't have left her under any circumstances

[StarGirl2517]

He was the one that rushed everything so fast and then all of a sudden he's deciding it's put him off. How is that possible?

[Ribhu]

I can reply to that coz I've seen many of my friends do this but please don't get hurt

[Ribhu]

Boys mostly rush things only when they are craving for intimacy n the physical touch, there's no other reason n when they are done with it they start losing interest in the relationship wheras for girls (most girls) its the opposite i guess

[StarGirl2517]

He talked so much about our future. Wanted my babies etc. It shocked me big time but I went along with the flow because I was happy and I thought he was too! His mum even said I made him so happy and I was the best thing to happen to him. He agreed and then all of a sudden he's moving to Liverpool and wants to be alone for a while. Could he have just shut his feelings off completely. He said he doesn't want any contact "for now"

[Ribhu]

its not possible to shut off feelings completely if he was so much in love with u
I don't know about his situation in particular
maybe he has his reasons too
just don't lose hope n self belief

[StarGirl2517]

I thought maybe he had just shut off his feelings completely but I didn't think that was possible!

[Ribhu]

Never

[StarGirl2517]

Thanks for a guys point of view! I just don't understand why he would be on tinder if he still has feelings for me. Though I signed up just to keep me occupied.

[Ribhu]

either he didn't deactivate it or he wants to keep his options open which means he's not totally into u

[StarGirl2517]

I was hoping all hope was completely lost. I don't think there's any way of knowing whether he has used it lately or not

[Ribhu]

u are right

[Ribhu]

Do u have any beautiful friend on tinder?
u can ask em to help u out

[StarGirl2517]

I was thinking of maybe doing that but maybe I should just leave it! I've decided to go no contact for a month and then message him. He said he wanted to cut ties for now.

[Ribhu]

okk
sometimes people cut off all ties only to see if he still wants u nd loves as initially nd if u do the same
if the above happens then two souls are deeply in love 😊

[StarGirl2517]

I thought he was saying that just to be nice. He said he wants to be alone for a while while he decides on moving but he has been online on whatsapp so much lately I can't help but think he's met someone else

[Ribhu]

sorry but i feel kinda same too

[StarGirl2517]

I was thinking that as well. Maybe it's a rebound? I dunno! I feel stupid for it hurting me so much after a month!

[Ribhu]

It'll initially but slowly im sure it'll heal
love is real complicated thing to get into n get out of

[StarGirl2517]

It is especially when they move things so fast and the disappear on you

[Ribhu]

I'm sorry u had to go through all this

[StarGirl2517]

It's ok! I just didn't think it would hit me this hard! I didn't know a guy who would promise you the earth and then just change! Maybe in time he'll realise what he's done.

[Ribhu]

it has happened with me too
in my case it was a girl though
so ik how u feel

[jman46241]

You didn't delete your account..

[StarGirl2517]

I only set up a new one the other day

[emel16]

Why would you?

[StarGirl2517]

Just to see if he swiped right too. I just clicked out of it and done nothing lol