Should I be friends with benefits with my ex gf?

I was in a relationship with this girl a year ago for about a month. She was moving way to fast and talking about having kids and that she loved me 3 weeks in. Over the past 6 months I started missing her and wanting her back. (I think it's more missing being loved) She contacted me back in October because she had questions. I figured since she obviously still thinking about me I would see where things lye and try to get her back. I told her that If she didn't want me and there was no chance of us getting back together tell me and I would never bother her again. She said it and I stuck to my word. So time went on and I realized it's for the best finally being happy with myself and being single for the first time in years. Then this past Sunday I get a random friend request from HER. I was shocked no sure what it was about so we started talking and she told me she not mad at me anymore and didn't like the way we left it. She said she would like to go out again but keep it "casual" since she is moving to Florida in June and doesn't want any labels. Just fun and sex. I don't want friends with benefits with her but I get why she wants that. I just don't think I could. I know I'll catch feelings and every part of me wants what we had before. I screwed that up. She is someone I've told a lot of personal stuff to and the first person that ever said they loved me so to demean that by being friends with benefits just sounds horrible. The thought of her being with another guy bothers me. Should I give her what she wants? It leaves her with the perfect opportunity for revenge after I broke her heart she can do the same to me now. Or do tell her no? I've told her the way I really feel but she said she doesn't want the same and she can't commit. So she knows the way I feel. Please help I feel horrible about the way I did her before. I'm not a bad person I was just hurting because of what my ex before her did to me. I feel that she is owed that revenge. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • What exactly did you do and I don't really know if you should be friends with benefits with her if you catch feelings. If she is the type to argue a lot and the next minute she just want cuddle then no I don't even think you should talk to her. If she always respected you and loved you then you should try. It's best to tell her how you feel because people liked be told things. So it's a yes no situation. But this is probably best for some one like a guy, or even had relationship. I'm focusing on education so I never really had one

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    • I broke up with her after she went away for an internship because I was scared of getting hurt. I talked with her last night about the way I was feeling and she said she can't do commitment she just wants no strings attached. When she moves in four months we would never see each other again so no matter which way things go it ends badly. There is really no way for us to both be happy.

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    • So should I go through with it or should I just leave it alone?

    • I think you probably shouldn't if it's going hurt you but if you don't she probably never going to talk to you again so I'm that case you should.

Most Helpful Guy

  • It is always a major red flag when a girl starts talking about kids that early in a relationship. Some women want babies so bad they throw rationale out the window and basically just look for a willing sperm donor. Hard to say that is what she is after now, but why take the chance? It is hard to turn up the chance to easy sex with no strings, but since you are pretty sure you will catch feelings and won't be able to end it when she leaves again, I think you should pass on this. Just seems like too much trouble and risk.

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What Girls Said 1

  • you used to date her cmon you'll catch feelings

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What Guys Said 1

  • I'd do it. Free sex whenever you want? Cmon man that's a definite yes.

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