Help! URGENT PROPOSAL GONE WRONG?

I was going to propose tonight but i might have to reschedule, we'll see. Anyways, my bowels picked the perfect time to practically explode in the bathroom of red lobster. No onr has came in here in the last 7 minutes and my To Be fiance is waiting at the table! I can't sit here waiting for it to dry to my bum fluff she will think I've left! The ONLY option I have at the moment is using the Toy Teddy bear that the little boy dropped in the stall next to mine a couple of minutes ago- I didn't notice, I was having a moment to shift some weight. There's surely enough fluff on it to absorb it right up.. if I need to... any more suggestions? call for help?


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