Do I still have a chance at a healthy love life?

I feel like I really messed up. I have a child by a man that I really feel like it's never going to work out with. I'm very hurt about this.

He's been making me feel like he's changing and truly wants to work things out. I already went from a sweetheart, to a bitter woman by the time he decided to change.

While he was showing signs of change... I was struggling with getting back to my true, sweet self. So, I was all bitter with an attitude. He was getting fed up with our arguments. The main thing is, I'm tired of spending money for him...

It's a long story but my main point is: I feel like he's texting other females because he's always deleting his texts and shying his phone away from my view. I saw him looking at porno pics on his phone right after we had sex.

It hurts me so much that I have a daughter by this man and once we are done for good, I have to face the probability that no man will ever (truly) want me bc I'm just another baby momma.

I know you're thinking: worry about your daughter. That's another (main) reason why I don't want to be with her dad. I don't want her to feel like she has to settle to be treated less than. I feel like I won't be able to prove to her that good men exists!

Am I right to feel like a hopeless romantic or is there hope?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • no one has the right to feel like thier a hopeless romantic unless all of there love ones die. there always hope. If I knew who you were in real life I would of definitely been there for you as a man. There always hope, but having a kid always complicate things dating wise and so does having a baby daddy that isn't great. So your main problem is your baby daddy witch leaves you two options. one find a way to work it out with him. two, remove him from you life, not your kids, and find someone new who going to treat you better

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    • Thank you. I hope so! God bless your child

Most Helpful Girl

  • It's better for your child's development, as well as maintaining your own sanity, to leave partners who behave in the way you've described above and will create an environment that is anything but stable/beneficial in any way.

    Is there hope if that's what you end up doing? Of course. I know many people who met someone new after they already had a child of their own and were very happy in their new relationship. As long as you're not moving from man to man on a weekly basis and/or living paycheck to paycheck, you're not the stereotypical 'baby momma'. Don't let that label alone define you and your self-worth.

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    • Thank you so much. I feel more hopeful. The most difficult part is getting rid of him but I hope he doesn't put up a fight and just leaves

    • No problem! I'm not sure about your living/financial arrangements with him but, just in case, I'd be sure to let some friends know about your situation so that they can be there for support. A friend who either stays with you and your daughter at your place in case this man resists being asked to leave, or at whose place you know you can stay for a bit while you tie up any loose ends with the situation at hand.
      Good luck. :)

    • I think that's a great idea but I don't have any friends. My close family really doesn't have space for me. The main friend that I had, knew everything but she stopped talking to me out of nowhere.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Definitely leave, having no father and a great, happy mother is still better than having a bad father and a bitter mom.
    My father left us like 10 years ago and I turned out fine, so don't worry about your daughter :)
    Plus there are still men that would accept you, why not?

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    • I agree. I turned out fine without my dad also but my mom continued today worthless men either. But I'll make better decisions

    • Having two parents isn't a requirement for a happy kid ☺

    • Very true

  • There will be haters, there will be doubters, there will be non-believers, and then there will be you proving them wrong.
    i hope you get the message...

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    • I definitely get the message. Thanks

  • My exwife had 4 kids when we got married, and we were married for 25 years. Don't be one of those typical baby mamas and enjoy your life. Do something with it.

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    • Thank u so much. That makes me feel 100% better!

    • Good. Be well!

What Girls Said 1

  • leave him. Focus on yourself and your daughter. The right man will come eventually

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