How do I get over someone I truly loved?

I'm seriously broken right now. My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years and yesterday I found out that he had been talking to another girl (for I don't know how long) and he was acting like everything was ok between the whole time. We were going through a rough patch, but what couple doesn't go through rough patches? I was under the impression that we were working things out, but the girl he has been talking too said that he said that our relationship died and that him and I didn't even talk like that. But, we talked every single day, even if we had arguments... we still talked so I thought everything was ok, but I guess I was wrong. He likes the other girl better because she has a car and a full time job (but he doesn't and he has no job) and they can go places and do more things, I guess. I don't have a car, but I have a job and I'm working hard to get one. But, we would always hangout at my house and watch movies together and smoke and I guess he got bored of me. I was always there for him even in those moments where I shouldn't have been there and It hurts because he said our relationship died, but I thought we were gonna be ok. I tried my best to make him happy. I feel really stupid now and I can't stop crying. I'm really hurting and I don't know what to do. What are the first steps to moving on from someone you truly loved?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You have no reason for regrets. You said it yourself - you did your best. You can't keep someone against their will. Find something that makes you happy and focus on it. Do stuff you have been postponing before. You can't change the past. No reason to dwell on it. Draw you conclusions on what people to avoid in the future and move on with your life. Good luck! :)

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Most Helpful Girl

  • That sucks as to how he did you. But honestly you listed that he has no car and no job, Is that really someone that you can see yourself with for long. Usually men like that end up dating someone who can help them out. He is no longer a headache for you anymore. Now he is someone else problem. You may not see it now, but believe me from what I am reading about the guy you are not missing anything with this guy. He wasted your time. Its going to take months to get over him because the breakup is fresh. It took me months to get over someone i was talking too. It was not easy, but as each day goes by you will start to notice that you will get hours without thinking until it becomes days and then months.

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What Guys Said 3

  • You have to acknowledge that you did your best but he just wasn't down, so there was nothing else you could do. At least he didn't cheat on you, or even manage to cheat on you?

    In terms of moving on, time is the greatest healer. Don't rush yourself, but also don't sit around crying over him. It's important to try to carry on living your life. Do things to distract yourself, go out and enjoy life. It's always hard at the beginning but if you allow yourself to move on then you will be able to in no time.

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    • He did cheat, basically

    • Talking to a girl isn't the same as cheating, even if he did like her. If he didn't do anything beyond that, I wouldn't call it cheating. Regardless, do your best to move on from it.

  • love doesn't die I still love the girl that cheated on me and told me about it but said it was rape I still love the girl that abused me love doesn't die if it's true love. I learned from both and I learned people like that aren't worth the time or energy. the first step is coming to terms with the mistakes you made that lead to that it takes a lot of time but you learn your a better person now and you can thank them for it eventually. do you want a solid piece of advice.

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  • You can't just get over someone you truly loved. Time heals the wounds, so after a couple of months, you'll be over him. First, you have to make sure, that you don't see each other too often. The best thing you could do after that, is deleting your pictures from your relationship. After that, you'll need some help of your friends to make sure, that you won't be sad. After all of this, it should be okay.

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What Girls Said 1

  • something similar happened to myself and my now ex boyfriend of 5 years - heartbreak is hardest fucking this i think i ever have been and ever will be through - and it will never stop hurting completely but give yourself time and space to heal and try your best to stop going over and over the situation but instead accepting it and moving on no matter how hard. let yourself feel everything you have to feel and don't get frustrated at how long it takes, over time you'll feel yourself slowly started to learn that you can breath without them and it is possible to live without them. What is meant to be will be and you may looks back in years to come and actually be thankful for the way things turned out. So yes just allow yourself time and patience but also have faith that what is meant to be will be x

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