Why do mostly guys find it difficult to be nice to their ex after she breaks up with him?

I broke up with my ex cause he was never there for me, he was so distant and communication was really poor, I got fed up and broke up, tho Im sorry for the fact that I broke up the wrong way (writing him a letter and returning his fav tshirt)... It's been over 3months the break up but my ex is mean, cruel and harsh towards me. He acts kinda cool when I'm there and he's alone but when people are present ESP mutual friends, he treats me like a stranger, snubs my hi's and behave he's busy doing nothing. not once not twice but thrice I tried chatting him up face to face but he acts really cold. Now I've decided to give him space but I noticed he's doing all to get my attention and gets jealous when I'm talking to other guys. so I wanna know, is it normal being mean to your ex or is there something he's holding on to (anger?) or I don't know I need your honest opinion guys


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  • I've only had one serious relationship and I frankly hate her and don't ever want to speak to her again. She's a self-centered, manipulative, immature bitch, and also a cheater. That's bad enough, but what really pisses me off about her was that I was so fucking good to her throughout the relationship, too good to be honest, that was my mistake. I cared too much for someone who didn't give a fuck about me. She literally used me and stayed with me because I was such a good boyfriend to her and not because she loved me because she never did and only made pretend to (her words, not mine). This girl literally fucking lied about being in love with me for almost a fucking year because she knew she was moving soon and thought she'd enjoy all the attention and love I gave her to make herself feel better. Puke.
    It was amazing to see how quickly she went from being a lovely girlfriend to a straight-up bitch. The catalyst was two weeks in which I was going through the most stressful event in my entire life, something that actually decided my entire future. If I didn't succeed my future career would have been over and I would have been in debt 100's of thousands of dollars with no way of paying it back. Literally the 2 most important weeks of my entire fucking life and instead of being there for me and supporting me while I was trying to get all my work done, she threw hissy fits because she wasn't getting the attention she wanted... for those two weeks, all it took was 2 damn fucking weeks of the most difficult time in my life for her to start showing her true colours. I should have dumped her ass then and there. Ever since those 2 weeks, everything just took a huge nose dive. She ended up cheating months later and breaking things off. However, she made sure it was after her birthday trip we took and just a week before her trip overseas with her best friend so she can go whore around with married men. What a fucking hoe.

    So yea, I think I have every right to hate my ex.

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    • Well that's quite unfortunate but mine was different. For the 2 months we dated I was there for this guy, I showed him so much love, so much, nobody ever believed I could date him cause seriously everyone knew he wasn't my match. But I looked over that, I held his hand in public and showed him off to everyone, I was all over him, mentally, physically, educationally, emotionally, I was there, I was more than a girlfriend to him and he was also sweet and nice to me till the second month of the relationship he started to behave different, he stopped coming around, hardly checks on me, takes things lightly, when I talk he says I'm turning into a complainer and a nag, he became a shadow I couldn't anymore. how would you feel if you dating someone who stays 3 doors away from your room and you don't see him in 2weeks 3weeks, yet he's always with his friends smoking drugging and shit! I swear I tried all I could..

    • , I fuking showed this boy so much love and I swear mehn I broke up not because I wanted to but because I thought that would get him off my mind and make me a much happy person, instead the opposite became the case, I became obsessed when he says he's moved on and that he's hurt that I let him go first and now he's broken as hell and can't forgive me and himself for loving me.. I swear mehnn since gen I've been trying to win his heart again, trying to be nice and soften his heart but no he's acting all mean and evil bruhhh

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What Guys Said 10

  • If you broke up with him, why are you trying to chat with him?
    I can't say how he feels, but I know how I feel after a breakup. I don't want to see her or interact with her until I've had a chance to get over it. In some cases, I'm fine if I never see her again. If you're the one who initiated the breakup, you should probably do him the courtesy of leaving him alone.

    Also, girls in my past have often said that I'm mean because of how I act after a breakup. I don't snub or mistreat them, but I don't treat them as anything special, either. I treat them as any other human I'd meet on the street. But that isn't what they want. They still want my attachment, and they still want me to treat them as someone special like the way I did when I was with them. That isn't going to happen.

    I don't know your situation, but if that's what you're expecting and if that''s why you're calling him mean, then you need to realize that when you rejected him, you rejected all that he had to offer to you as well.

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    • Sigh thanks for this. its sad but it's the truth

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    • Wow I really I'm speechless and at the same for the first time I'm feeling sort of remorseful and guilty about what I did.

    • Thanks a lot mehn

  • lol, is it the thing? I got completely opposite experience from girls

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  • He is just trying to win you back through these actions, but please don't give in.

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  • So, let me get this straight. you wrote him a letter, gave back his favorite T-shirt and you thought that was enough? Are you for real?

    *scratches head*

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  • i don't have an ex, if i did, i'd probably avoid them

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  • Jelousness

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  • I found no diffficulties in it.. its perfectly normal...

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  • he still has feelings or he just dont wanna see you with anyone else

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  • Broke up with my ex for the same reason. She was nice to me for a month but as soon as she got a new boy toy she became exactly this way. I guess it's pretty normal.

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