Have you ever fallen in love with someone who didn't fall in love with you?

Have you ever fallen in love with someone who didn't fall in love with you?
Nothing wounds the human soul like unrequited love,
"Do you love me?" She said, "No, not ever."
A crushing blow, the world turns dark, and blackness fills my heart.
How long will I feel this way? Forever.

  • I have never been in a relationship
    27%(46)30%(112)Vote33%(66)
  • I have been in a relationship but I have never fallen in love.
    13%(22)12%(45)Vote12%(23)
  • I have been in a relationship and fell in love but I never had a partner who also fell in love with me.
    13%(22)17%(63)Vote21%(41)
  • I have been in a relationship, fallen in love, and those partners also fell in love with me.
    17%(30)13%(49)Vote10%(19)
  • I have been in a relationship and fallen in love. Some partners fell in love with me and some partners did not.
    30%(53)28%(102)Vote24%(49)
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
I am surprised that no one commented on the short poem below the picture. It's not great literature but it is an original work.

0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • Thank you for asking this question. :) Actually, I do believe that some people fall more in love than others. Like at the moment, I feel more in love with my partner than my partner loves me, but I think it may equally be a different way of showing love between people, maybe the person who loves you does not show it in a way that you understand? There are five different ways (according to books, but I believe there are many more) on how people show their love, so maybe one doesn't feel loved, but one is very much... if that makes sense :)

    0|1
    0|0
    • Thank you for you thoughtful reply. My girlfriend of 2 years says, quite candidly, that she does not love me but I will consider whether she perhaps loves me in ways of which she may be unaware. Despite her extremely high IQ, I think she is not always emotionally aware at the same high level.

    • Show All
    • People with a high IQ do tend to be more practical (not generalising, but they usually are)... so when she says she does not love you, it may be her way of thinking that she has become too 'dependant' to someone else regarding her feelings, hence why she is trying to gain back her independence by saying something like this... it is quite common actually... a lot of my friends do say this in fear that they will be respected less/more vulnerable/less independent... but at the end of the day, you also need to look at her actions... does she lie to you? Does she stay out late and only wants to spend as least time as possible with you (and rather sleep over at her friend's?) These are the signs of worrying about... or that she would not want to me intimate with you... in other cases, usually (and I am saying usually, because everyone is different), it is just a mere desire of expressing that she is an independent and strong woman... in my opinion.. I hope this helps.. :)

    • Very insightful and very wise beyond your years! Thanks

Most Helpful Guy

  • I have once but later I found out that it was better for me cuz the girl was exactly the opposite of what I expected

    0|1
    0|0
Sponsored

What Girls Said 62

  • I have had dudes that I liked that didn't like me back, but it wasn't really what I'd call "love", we never got to the point where we formed feelings that deep.

    I mean sure it sucked but the way I see it is there's no reason to cry over someone who doesn't feel the same about you.

    2|2
    0|0
    • Logic never soothes the heart.

    • Lol maybe for me it does, but then again I find it hard to fall in love. It was by a stroke of luck that I fell for the guy I'm with now.

    • I'm glad that Cupid is such a good marksman!

  • Every time I have a major crush on a guy feelings are unreturned. I went on a couple dates with this guy I had a crush on since September. These were huge feelings. He's also the only guy I've really liked in four years. We spent a lot of time together only for him to say he wants to only be friends and that our dates weren't technically dates, even though he asked me, paid, and called whatever we were doing a relationship. I'm really hurt by it because it feels like I'm destined to never know what requited love feels like.

    0|1
    0|0
    • That poem is it exactly. You never forget how much you felt, no matter how long it's been. I guess that's why they call it a crush. 😉Get it? Because your heart gets stomped on...

    • I appreciate your reply.

  • I've been in love (sincere and truly) with few guys the whole life so far. My best friend, my English lecturer and my browser game partner.

    Its unrequited love I had with my best friend. I waited for him for around 8 years, on 9th year he finally married someone else. I got heartbroken but then I found a man that cares a lot about me. Thats my English lecturer. However, he never confessed to me the same as my final guy. So yeah, on some point I asked myself what and where am I wrong really?

    Another girls (that wants to date my best friend long time ago) keep telling me I am ugly anyway.

    0|1
    0|0
    • Women can be so cruel to other women!

    • Show All
    • @asker: Yeah. Because of jealousy they can try to do anything to bring others down without the guy's knowledge. Dailies bullies like "you're ugly, so dont ever think of winning him from me" or simply by act of trying to make me seems like I am the evil one on the guy is basically what others done on me for years. That is not including the losing pair of shoes or sharp tack nails being hidden inside my purse/bag/shoes. Anything that cause injury could possibly done by them. Here is how jealousy could drive even the prettiest girl to become an ugly one.

      For me, I dont snatch a guy if I knew he likes my friend or my friend likes him even if he might fell for me. That is hurting my pride and I value friendship a lot. I think few of my so called friends doesn't share this idea anyway.

    • @Adviceforadvice I hope so hahaha. Maybe you're right that it is more about them than me. :D but thank you anyway.

  • I've never been in this situation.

    My fiance and I both had instant feelings for each other when we met. Except we met when we were 12 and 14 respectively so it took us a few years to figure out exactly what to do with said feelings and handle them correctly lol

    0|1
    0|0
  • I've been in love twice I think. However, I'm not heartbroken about either one. One had strong feelings for me and the other one? Well, I'm pretty sure he was in love with me but didn't want to admit it and I'm also pretty sure he's still in love with me but won't admit it. I however am over the both and happily living my single life without any attachments.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Yes. I've loved him for quite a while now. I've been his friend for 5 years and loved him for 2. He's let me see a side of him that not many people get to see, and I've fallen hard. I know it'll never work though. He's in college, I'm in high school. He likes blondes, I'm naturally brunette. He's considered cool, I'm considered not. It's awful.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Fell in love with one of my best friends. We have known each other for years. It didn't work out... I think he only ever loved me as a friend. Eventually I realized I was in love with the idea of being with him, since we had grown up together. Felt like a Gatsby situation.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Not loved someone where they didn't me
    but i've had feelings for people who didn't feel the same way about me..

    0|1
    0|0
  • I don't know if it was love exactly. i had a huge crush on a friend years ago. he never saw me that way. it hurt a lot at the time, but i got over it. it's easy to, if you don't have to see that person ever. lol.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Yeah I did when I was 16 I had fallen for a guy who's basically a fuck boy (yeah I know I'm an idiot) and we were basically best friends, he flirted with me a lot so I though he was into me, so I asked him out. He rejected me and said he was into his best friend Jonathan, turns out he was bisexual too and I never knew 😂 but yeah it was a big stab in the chest cause we flirted a lot and spend a lot of time together so yeah that sucked 😂

    0|1
    0|0
    • Rule 1. Never ask a man out first.

    • Show All
    • Don't ask him out because a masculine man isn't attracted to a masculine move, which is asking him out first. Dont listen to Jason. Masculine men want a feminine woman, which involves comforting neediness.

    • Let the man approach you first. You be as lovely as possible, and grab his attention by opening you body language to him. If he doesn't respond, move on to the next. Don't get caught up in those needy men that need you to make the first move. They are weak in nature. You probably want a man with a back bone.

  • I've never had that happen thankfully. The love has been reciprocated.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I've never dated a guy, but I've had my heart broken by one. See I know the pain of liking a guy who doesn't like you back, but it hurts a whole lot more when you like someone, who admits they like you back, and who admits they really want to ask you out, and then they go against their word and get back with their ex.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I once told a guy that I loved him. His reply "what about somebody else?". How do you even come up with that. I may have thrown something at him.

    0|1
    0|0
    • Justifiable homicide. I would gladly defend you for free!

    • Lol. Even worse it was a guy i had been dating for six months. He was an idiot I realized in that moment

  • Yes, and it hurts whenever it happens, although one of them (only one!) was upfront with me and told me how he felt (or didn't feel) because he respected me as a friend and didn't wanna lead me on. It still hurt but I was very glad and appreciative of his honesty. For this reason, we've remained pretty close friends.

    0|2
    0|0
  • yes and It feel like I was the most stupid person in the world.
    Why you guys so shallow that you never see the beautiful heart in a ugly girl?

    0|1
    0|0
    • Why do you think all guys are like the few that you have dated?

  • it was one sided love to a crush or just attraction to a man i didn't love but was sexually aroused of.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Yes.
    It hurts a lot when they don't even notice you

    0|1
    0|0
  • Yes. Just recently met someone who told me to be honest and to be real to them. I admitted my feelings and gave them the space and time to clear their own head. I honestly thought we had a chance and after meeting them (we lived an hour apart and were only texting) I realized they just wanted easy sex. I mean sure, thats great and all but fuck. I wish people could be upfront about their feelings and what they want before leading someone on. I feel so disappointed in myself. But I have learnt my lesson with that one.

    0|1
    0|0
    • Sometimes, life just sucks. All you can do is to learn your lessons and move forward. :)

    • Indeed life sucks aha! But there is more to life than that one person who did you wrong😊 so yes wise words.

  • I'm so lucky the guy that I was in a relationship with I started to love him first but eventually he started loving me I can't imagine it it was a one way love.

    0|1
    0|0
  • For years I loved my childhood fling.. We were on, off, on off but never a couple. For about 10 years while I had relationships I between.
    I declared my love for him only last year and it wasn't reciprocated. Let it go... I will now never give my love to anyone who doesn't love me x

    0|0
    0|0
    • What if you meet and fall in love with someone who says, "I will never declare my love for a lady unless she first declares her love for me."?

    • He has some massive hang ups/or ego issues.
      If a man says that then that shouldn't mean you leave yourself open to be vulnerable.
      Declaring your love means nothing anymore... It's how you show it in the long term (past the infatuation lust phase).

  • I've been infatuated with people who didn't feel the same. Though I wouldn't personally call it love. To me that's something very different that can really only grow over time.

    0|1
    0|0
  • yup. I told him that I was falling for him and that I know he cares about me but he said he doesn't love me. Guess it was only about sex for him.

    0|1
    0|0
  • ugh who hasn't. then again it's ok because fuck them

    0|2
    0|0
  • I mean I was in love with some boys in school but it was not "real love" because I didn't really have a relationship with them! and I didn't really even KNOW them.

    0|1
    1|0
  • Sadly so, but I'm beginning to realize that he just doesn't like me that way and it will never be. Sucks on his part because I thought the word of him but he keeps chasing these beauty queens who care nothing for him.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I don't think I've ever fallen in love, I know I've loved people and they've loved me back very much (they said they fell in love) but I dunno if I just haven't met the right person or if I don't love in that way.
    What option should I choose?
    I have deeply loved people and they've loved me back (but I wouldn't say I've fallen in love)

    0|0
    0|0
    • i guess you should give it some more time till you really understand what needs in your life

  • I don't know if falling in love but so so so many times, like 98% of the times, my feelings were not corresponded.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Never

    1|1
    0|0
  • i have been in a relationship fell in love and the partner faked love but was emotionally empty

    0|2
    0|0
    • That is painful at any age!

  • No...😅

    0|2
    0|0
  • More from Girls
    32

What Guys Said 71

  • Somewhere yes and no, I am a browny fit schoolboy. My story starts with a School Hall (There was a practice going on for some annual program). I am an instrumentalist (Keyboard/Piano Player). I am the best player in the school premises. Almost, everyone knows me till now and that's a success for me. I achieved a lot and I done a youtube tutorials too.

    My life was going smoothly...
    ...
    ..
    .
    BUT,

    One day, My guru (Teacher) told me to play for a program with some choir girls. I had to say, yes (He was my mentor and i can't regret the proposal). When I was there during the practice session, I saw the love of my life, singing with her melodious voice. She started staring and smiling at me. I gave a grim look and laughed at her (She looked terrible though she was cute).
    She came to me outside the hall and asked for the username for insta. I said it, she added me and had a endless talks on the chat. I had a crush on her.

    The day went by, My achievement started fading away because of my love. I know, its very difficult to handle the life and love at a same time but... My love is my life. So, I sacrificed my time for her. It made me a average student from a topper in my class. I didn't seems to be angry for this, because i wanted that care, that love, that feel, that only she can give me in this whole world. I was in love with her. But, she was not. She was talking care of me as a best friend :(

    One day, I was thinking to leave her because i thought, i failed to achieve her heart...

    BUT...

    That was the turning point of my life, She said, I can't live without you and started crying. Then i told at last...

    I love you.

    She started crying and I asked, Will you marry me?

    She said yes, I love you too.
    I will never ever leave you.

    This was our love story...❤❤

    1|1
    0|0
  • I've been in love before and to be honest, we think they love us back and times we do know they love us back, other times, we are unsure.
    I remember falling heads over heels for this one girl and devoting everything I had, my entire being down to my molecules cared about only one thing which is making her laugh and smile everyday. It was like my drug, her laugh and smile was my addiction and I couldn't stop. You fall hard and you only hope they do as well but then things go south when you remember getting down one knee on a Monday then a few months later on a Monday she breaks your soul by leaving. To this very day I questioned if she truly loved me or was I just a chapter in her life. I think the answer is both which is even more sad.

    I've been in and out of relationships more than I can count with both hands which is kind of sad, I think my own fault is that I forget timing is everything. I was trying to be serious in a time where you're supposed to mingle with everyone then calm down and get attached, I did things backwards which is were my life is now.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Yes, it happens all the time, it's natural. There are people out there who likes us and people who doesn't like us. Same thing when it comes to love.

    The thing is, if you love somebody who doesn't love you back, probably the best thing you could do is try to get over it, move on. There's a good probability that you'll end up hurting yourself pretty bad if you keep pursuing that love.

    0|1
    0|0
  • can't say I have, unless count this fictional character I had a thing for when I was a kid, lol, but nobody real anyway. I always been rather reserved in many ways, so people tend to just fall for me before I fall for them sort of, I suppose its "safer" that way, but I can't really help it either.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Well I dunno if it's love. All I knw when I click with someone, I care for her.. Also I can open up.. I am in a similar situation. But the gal rejected me coz she doesn't want me. She has her fiance. Her weakness is she likes built guys so rite nw although having her fiance, she is comfortable n closer to a colleague who is built n cute...
    She no more talk to me when alone. She linked with her frens n mine. Only in groups where this built n cute guy is, then she will talk to me.. It's like forcing herself. I knw her moves..
    Am so stressed. Everyday I feel stressed coz we work in same floor

    0|1
    0|0
  • I am in love with this girl who happens to be my bestie.. She doesn't have love left in her to give it to anyone bc she has a history.. it aches to feel she won't get married to me.. but can't afford to loose her on the pretext of Love... I have the courage to accept his fact that I won't be able to get her as my wife.. ever.. But it's fine... all I do is to ensure she's healthy and safe..

    0|1
    0|0
    • This sounds horribly tragic!

    • Show All
    • You know what girl.. you're elder than me.. actually not a girl.. woman to be precise.. still i feel connected.. you have the apt sense I love !!

    • And Yes! I love the way you have made preparations.. done some really great work on the question.. I loved that..

  • it happens all the time to people everyday, love is freewill and therefore you can't make someone love you and it hurts when they choose not to. i always get told im "like a brother" to girls or their best friend... its getting so frustrating i wanna give up on love... why hope in vain when the results are always the same? :(

    0|1
    0|0
    • Don't you just feel like punching somebody in the face when they give you one of those lame lines, like "One day, you're gonna meet the right girl and she's gonna be so lucky. . . blah blah blah!"

    • yes... i get that a lot, its like theyre saying, "any girl would be lucky to have you but not me, i can do better" and when they say "i don't deserve you" its not a compliment, they are meaning " i deserve better." though they know you take it the wrong way

  • Every time. I've always had crushes and got rejected every time. Made gifts and shit. Tried a lot of stuff but nothing works. So I've just stopped getting crushes, no point if you get hurt in the end no matter what. Now I'm focusing more on myself and I'm improving myself.

    1|1
    0|0
  • yes and it was hard but i never gaved up she was the only girl i liked and for her i was like a brother u know i asked her to go out with like 5 times but she never accept and then next year i became taller and i started gym so i was more attractive so sh started looking mire at me and hangout with me but i already gave up so when she wanted to go out with me i said no because i lost 1 year asking her and i knew that she was just liking me for how i look like

    1|1
    0|0
  • so many fucking times. i fell in love like 1000 times. sometimes I even think I was in love with being in love.

    1|1
    0|0
    • I have seen that in others and at one time recognized it in myself. I called "being in love with being in love," or "being addicted to being in love."

    • Show All
    • Addictions can feel damned good!

    • hum... some. loool.

  • Yes I have fallen in love with someone, that did not fell the same as I did.

    It sucks.

    Unfortunately for me, it took that person passing away for me to find out I had been nothing but a pay check to her.

    0|1
    0|0
    • That sounds horribly, horribly awful!

  • Hells to the yes

    0|1
    0|0
  • I seem to always fall for girls who've already given up on themselves.

    0|2
    0|0
  • I've fallen in love with 3 of my friends and only one resulted in a relationship but it turned out he was only using me to "prove his bisexuality" to his friends. dumped him real fast after he said so online where he thought I wouldn't see. I fell hard for another one of my friends but he's aromantic and never had a romantic attraction to anyone. The third time... well she doesn't know yet but I'll figure something out.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think a girl at work had a crush on me. I told her friend yesterday i actually really dislike her due to her being lazy at work and i was always asked to help her. I never helped her. I used to talk shit behind her back too about how her and my now manager (who i also really hate for the same reason) would talk all morning not get work done.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Love is still a strong work, but I liked her very much. Yes, it has happened.

    0|1
    0|0
  • i have never been in a relationship, but I only ever have one sided love

    0|2
    0|0
  • That's how I feel when my fridge gives me the cold shoulder

    1|2
    0|0
  • I rarely if not never fall in love. There have been times where a gal starts to fall in love with me but it wasn't reciprocated.

    0|1
    0|0
    • I hope I have women falling in love with me when I am 101 years old! :)

  • Oh no. The memories are pouring in. Yeah, I've been there, once. It ached badly.

    0|1
    0|0
    • It consumes the soul!

  • Probably happens to women all the time when it comes to White men. White men don't respond to women anymore. White men never approach them, never hit on them and never ask them out. It's over.
    Women can only sh*t on White men for so long. What, you think we'd just take it and live with it? That there won't be response from us White men to this anti-White male feminist BS?

    Now go find yourself a cat-calling, groveling ugly Black guy to settle down with, haha. White men are not for you anymore. Very soon 100% of all White men will be MGTOW.

    0|0
    1|1
  • No. But I have gotten my pride hurt, which felt like a loss of love at first.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I don't know if my partners ever fell in love with me, they turned into complete dicks.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Sure, who hasn't?

    0|1
    0|0
  • I guess yeah. Sucks ass. Date someone else :) it'll get better faster if you get another girl you like.

    0|1
    0|0
  • loving someone who doesn't love you back , seems pretty good feeling in initially because you think that your love can make him/her love you but as the time passes you come to know that this is nothing but just you are holding a gun to your head and about to pull the trigger. It's better if they don't love you, then either search for the new one who does or get busy in your own life.😊

    0|1
    0|0
  • is that not the normal way. I have met many people who I feel I could have loved if only they had felt the same way about me

    0|1
    0|0
  • yes, there is a girl. it's been an year I proposed her. she rejected me on that first moment and she is ready to accept me as a friend. I have literally been fallen very hard to her and like it's my love at the first sight feeling! I always love people and you know, no one loves me ! no one !! I think it's not the right person I chose out or there isn't someome for me 😞

    0|1
    0|0
  • You know what's worse?
    When you make a birthday wish to finally meet your true love.
    Then you have a dream from start to finish about you and your true love.
    The next day it comes true.
    You both know it but you are too nervous to approach her.
    And it never happens.

    Then you spend 6 years going insane letting the darkness consume you praying that she'll set YOU FREE!

    This is true by the way

    0|1
    0|0
    • Is it too late to find her and see if she might still be interested?

    • She's moved on with another.
      I only saw her 3 times in the past 6 years.
      She mad at because one of her friends misinterpreted what I said which was "I don't care if we're together but I don't trust him" speaking of her boyfriend at the time who I had a bad feeling about. Her friend said I was trying to break them up and she didn't even let me explain my Side of the story.

    • *she was mad me because*

  • Never been in a rleationship but i fell deeply in love, in fact thats that very reason as to why i'm getting therapy...

    0|1
    0|0
  • More from Guys
    41
Loading...